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Surprised by poll results



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I was really surprised by the poll results on "does you SO know how much you weigh". I was really surprised by the amount of people whose spouse or SO didnt know. I have always guarded my weight like a lion. No one in my personal life knows it. The thoughts of my Dh knowing it literally makes me feel faint and sick. I know that he sees me naked, but I have a major hang up with him hearing the actual number. I just assumed he would find out the day of surgery. I figured since I was there over my obesity, my weight would be the big topic of that day. I just assumed that the number would be rattled off by nurses and the Dr left and right. I have just been trying to prepare myself for my Dh and entire family to finally hear the number. So many people have said that they are many months out from surgery and there Spouse/SO still doesnt know. How in the world did you pull it off?

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Interesting! I think most of us all feel the way you do. It is a source of shame and embarrassment for most of us, too, so why would we be announcing it? I have been banded almost 3.5 years and my husband has no idea how much I weight. He doesn't ask, doesn't care, and just supports me when I say I lost X lbs. Do thin people announce what they weigh? I have no idea how much my "normal sized" friends weigh so why would they ask me? RELAX! AND, if someone asks you, you can always say you are not comfortable sharing that information! Nice way of saying MYOB!!!

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It just never bothered me. I don't think I told him until I was looking into surgery, for the simple fact that it never came up. I had definitely weighed when he was in the room, maybe he looked and already knew. Who knows. But it doesn't bother me to tell him what I weigh any more than it does to tell him what my favorite color is, or what I'm thirsty for. Same with the rest of my family - if they ask I will tell them, if it comes up in conversation (not my weight necessarily, but a during a recent conversation an unclue of mine whot ops 400 lbs said someone his size couldn't be banded...) I will tell them. I don't have it printed up on a t-shirt or anything.

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My DH knows, but that's because every time I get off the scale, I can't wait to tell him. He knew my weight even when I was at my heaviest and before the band, not losing weight at all.

But I was not weighed on my surgery date. Nobody said a thing about my weight. The only times I've been weighed was in the Dr's office at the beginning of my appointments. But DH only came into the room where they weigh one time. Other times, he has waited on the couch in the waiting room for me to get that portion of the appointment done (it's a small room). It's highly likely that they won't weigh you on your surgery date, nor even mention it. I doubt it was even listed on my paperwork that they had just for my surgery. Why would the surgical staff need to know that? The anesthesiologist would need to know, but not everybody. You have to realize that they are probably aware that you know you're overweight and people tend to be sensitive about the number, so they'd have to be some insensitive asses to keep rattling off your weight so everybody could hear.

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...So many people have said that they are many months out from surgery and there Spouse/SO still doesnt know. How in the world did you pull it off?

I'm at a loss as to how NOT to pull it off...

Why on earth would he ever need to know?

It's not like it's written in giant orange numbers on the end of your bed or tattooed on your face.

My husband didn't acompany me to a single appointment, and he likely never will. Why would he need to?

He did go with me to surgery and picked me up the next day. I was not weighed before OR, and if I were, I would have asked him not to look (but he wouldn't have anyway). If anyone has ever asked me my weight in front of him, I decline to say while he's there. He understands and is not offended by it.

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I don't usually tell anyone what I weigh unless they are overweight themselves. A girl from work asked me the other day and I was wary about answering. Her guess was about 20 lbs less than I weigh. I told the truth and then jokingly said that my boobs weigh at least 10 lbs each. :(

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I'm with Steph, at no point on my surgery day was my weight mentioned until I was with my surgeon in the OR and he asked me how much I had lost in my pre op diet, 5 seconds later I was out for the count. I think it was just his way of distracting me from the fact that the anethesiologist was doing his thing on the other side of the operating table lol. My dh has come along with me to fill appointments, but has always waited in the waiting room. You could keep your "number" to yourself pretty easily if your partner isn't going to be there in the dr's office with you for your fill appointments along the way. It can be done if you are wanting it to be that way.

That said, my dh knows how much I weighed at my highest and has known along the way. I told him yesterday that I was staring down the barrel of 100 pounds lost. Its never been something that I kept from him or my family and closest friends. Yes, I was ashamed of being that big, but I was more proud of my loss. Maybe you will feel the same post surgery too.

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My Dh has never pushed me to tell him what I weigh at all. But there have been different things that have popped up throughout the years. For instance, when he went to the Dr with me for ultrasounds of our babies. I always asked him to turn around during the weigh in. It isnt that he really needs to know he just thinks its silly that I try to hide it from him. He says he could care less what I weigh. It is my hang up and I cant help it. I dont know why I assumed it would come out on surgery day, but I did. Thanks for the responses. And even if it does come out...I do not plan to weigh that much longer!

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My husband and I were banded together.(Well, not literally; we were banded on the same day, that is.) When we started the band journey he found out my weight because we looked at each other's pre-surgery paperwork where it was listed. Now I tell him what the scale says because it is a victory and celebration rather than a shame that I hide.

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