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fear of failure..



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Hi,

I'm new to the board and am scheduled for Lapband surgery on March 18 somewhere in CT. I have done a lot of research and seminars since July 2004 and finally made up my mind in October. I have met several people who have had success with the Lapband. I was wondering if any of you felt like this was just one more diet, one more trip down the weight loss highway. I have fear of failure and it's probably because all other diets in the past have failed over the long run. Did any of you have these reservations?

Renee

Age 48

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Actually, I felt the same way you did before surgery. Now, I wouldn't trade my band for anything. I dieted my whole life, I tried every diet that came along, and this band has helped me more in the four months that I have had it than anything else ever did.

I think we all have the same thoughts you are going through right now, believe me if you follow the rules, it will work for you.

Good Luck!

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Renee, I guarantee you we ALL have felt that way at one time or another. But you know what's different this time? A little piece of silicone that is STILL inside me, doing its job. No other diet has given me a permanent monitor, something that helps me NOT take that 10th, 15th, 20th bite. Relying on an inner voice is what's failed--but this time the voice has VOLUME and I have to listen.

How many times in my life have I wished and prayed for something to make me stop eating when I know I'm full? How many times have I wondered why on earth I'm doing this to myself? Well, that's what the band does. It inserts an actual physical barrier that sends a STOP, YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH message.

What I do with that message is up to me. But it is a whole lot harder to ignore than, well, than no message at all (which is what had been the case pre-band). It makes me eat more slowly, giving my rational brain time to catch up and perhaps figure out something else to do.

That's what's different, Renee. This is a whole new thing and gives us a power we have never had. Of course it's possible to self-sabotage--I know, I do it all the time--but it's also MUCH easier to stop negative behaviors before much damage has been done.

Good luck, and be sure to come back!

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Ditto on what Alex and Betty said. I totally thought it would just be another thing I'll fail at when I got my band but it hasn't been that way at all. I swear my band is the thing that makes the decision if I'm going to eat easily or put up a fuss. I went for Breakfast yesterday and after 4 very small well chewed bites I got that total feeling of discomfort... It wasn't a PB but I knew enough to stop eating. Later at dinner though I was totally able to eat a nice reasonable plate of food and only felt that little band nudge towards the very end reminding me I can't eat limitless amounts of food. I have allowed a single candy bar daily thru my entire band journey and have never felt like a failure or deprived. I recall meeting someone last week at my gyn. docs and she said I really must feel deprived. I had to immediately chuckle and tell her that was not the case at all. I still get my treats, I still on a very rare occassion eat at places like McDonalds, I don't feel deprived at all. (Okay... except for maybe when I really want to eat some particular yummy food in front of me and my band doesn't want to let me) BUT that is the only time and doesn't happen too often. Ussually I can eat nice amounts, feel satisfied and lose weight. Best of luck to you, Teresa

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Hey Renee ~~ I couldn't help but notice we are getting our bands the same day!!!

I know it is a hard desicion and you wonder if it is just like everything else you have tried,BUT LOOK AT ALL THE SUCCESS STORIES HERE. This will work. It won't be easy but it will work. I know we will have to do our part but we will have the band on our side and you helping that tool will work. Please be positive and try making some changes now. That will help you get through changes after surgery.

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You know, I had lost and gained 100 pounds twice and had struggled with diets like we all have, but for some reason when I decided to get the band, I did not feel like it was going to be one more failure for me. I just knew it would work. And it has.

Nancy

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Claraluz~ I guess that was alot like me. I FELT THIS HAS TO WORK CAUSE NOTHING ELSE DID. Yes (I've had moments of what if)(but I've also had moments of what if I don't)? Fear of the unknown is deffinetly scary but fear of our health right now is even worse. RENEE IT WILL WORK!!

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Corgi, What a great question. I have been asking myself the same thing but never thought about posting it. The replies all the members gave made me feel sooooo much better. This is such a hard decision, I go wednesday to see my regular Dr. to see if he will fill out the referral papers for insurance authorization. There is that inner fear what if this to doesn't work? Good luck to you!

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Corgi, we all have felt what you are feeling, but thisis the first time I am losing weight without feeling like Iam dieting.. without weighing and measuring my foods, counting points, taking appetite suppressants, etc..it feels so good I can actually say I will not regain this weight back this time, my band is the tool I have needed!

It is normal to have these fears, but I do not know of any who have not had success in one way or another with their bands, you will do great!

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Guest jodie

hi, my name is jodie. I am being banded tomorrow 2-23. that is why iam up at 5.00am nervous and cant sleep:nervous i would like to thank you all for what you have said. i have been reading your messages and had made me feel better. thanks

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Jodi - Why don't you start a new thread with your information. You will have more people answer you that way.

Good Luck with your surgery, and let us know how you are when you are able to post.

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Corgi, you'll be back on here in no time telling us about how your life has changed..for the better.

Sitting in the band dr's office yesterday, several people were waiting for their initial consult. Their comments like, "This is my last hope." "I've tried everything else and nothing has worked." "I'm a failure"... sounded all too familiar.

Then I met 2 slender ladies there that I thought were salespersons. One had lost 100#, been banded 3 years. The other had lost 150#, banded 2 years.

It's nice to see both sides of the coin. Really makes you appreciate your band all over again!

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