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Spouse Motivation

LatinaLite

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LatinaLite    44

LatinaLite
Posted

So I had gastric bypass surgery on 1/23/17, highest weight was 330, surgery weight was 274, and currently at 224. I've lost 50 lbs and 15 inches. I feel great, have tons of energy, and love going to the gym or outdoors with my 3 kids, but my boyfriend, who is over weight as well (around 315lbs.) Just can't seem to keep up with me anymore. He has lost around 20 lbs on his own since last Christmas, which is fantastic, but lately he has been sliding back into old bad habits. He always has an excuse not to go to the gym, he sneaks sweets late at night, won't go out with us, and just generally sits on his butt all day watching YouTube videos...when not at work. We started this weight loss journey together! He didn't want surgery, but me having osteoarthritis at only 34 years old, I needed it. He is approaching 40 this year and even though he doesn't have serious health problems now, I'm afraid that if he doesn't start to change and get active, he will soon. What attracted us to each other was out sense of adventure and loving the outdoors...now Im lucky if I get him to go on the back porch. I'm so frustrated! Any suggestions on what may be the problem or how to get him motivated once again?

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blondie66    271

blondie66
Posted

It's much easier to stick to the weight loss journey after our surgeries. He hasn't had the surgery and finds it hard to stick to a weight loss program. Unfortunately he won't lose the weight until he wants and is committed or has surgery himself. The reality is it's his issue not yours. Take it from a 51 year old women! Take care of yourself and if he wants to join he will and if not you will move on. Do not sabotage your life and health for a partner, parent, sibling, friend...anyone.


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LatinaLite    44

LatinaLite
Posted

O won't slow down because of his choices...but it is hard loving forward without my partner. I don't want to see him having the health problems many over weight people have. I want to spend these adventures with him...not simply sharing them with him afterwards.

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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      I have no clue where to upload this, so I'll put it here. This is pre-op vs the morning of my 6 month appointment! In office I weight 232, that's 88 lbs down since my highest weight, 75 lbs since my surgery weight! I can't believe this jacket fit... I am smaller now than the last time I was this size which the surgeon found really amusing. He's happy with where I am in my weight loss and estimates I'll be around 200 lbs by my 1 year anniversary! My lowest weight as an adult is 195, so that's pretty damn exciting to think I'll be near that at a year. Everything from there will be unknown territory!!

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        You look amazing!!! 😻 you have been killing it!

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        Congratulations! You're making excellent progress and looking amazing!

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        So proud of you Cat. Getting into those smaller size clothes is half the fun isn't it?. Keep up the good work!!!!

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        That's brilliant! You've done amazing!! I should probably think about changing my profile picture at some point. Mine is the doll from Squid Games. Ironically the whole premise of the show is about dodging death. We've both done that...

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