In a really bad place!

[Linda Frazier 0]

I will be 4 years out in July. At 1 year out, I had lost 122 pounds. I was told I was too thin ( 5'6" 155 lbs). Stupidly, I continued to exercise, but got lax with my good food choices and pitched the "rules." Each year at my annual exam, I have steadily gained weight. My surgeon said in the beginning that her goal weight for me was 200 pounds. My pre-surgery weight was 283. She told me to just not gain anymore. About 6 months ago, I was having problems with reflux. My pcp sent me to digestive disease docs. They did an endo because I had also been throwing up quite a bit after eating. The video of the endo procedure showed that I had a restriction where the pylorus goes into the small intestine. Naturally, they forwarded this info to my bariatric surgeon. She did another endo and stretched the area. I have had no more vomiting, but continue to gain weight. I'm nearing 200. Bye-bye ONEDERLAND! I know I have sabotaged my surgery, my weight loss, my healthy lifestyle. My surgeon told me that I have raised my set point, that I could possibly lose 10 pounds, but no more than that. So I've pretty much given up. I'm buying larger clothes and eating mostly junk. Before anyone asks, yes I have a therapist and a shrink. I guess the fact that she told me I had no hope of losing the weight I've gained back just leaves me thinking I wish I had known this before the surgery. I was naive enough to believe since my stomach was so much smaller, I couldn't possibly gain much (and it was slow at first with all the vomiting, I was maintaining). I didn't have much for a support system in place from the beginning and have less now. I don't go to the meetings because I don't want to discourage anyone pending surgery, and honestly, I'm ashamed I've wasted my opportunity. My body image has been negative since I was a 135 pound teenager. You all know the story, not thin enough, not pretty enough, not popular, etc. I travel for my job now and am not happy with the way I look in my professional clothing. This is going nowhere! It's turned into a huge rant, and I didn't intend to go there. The bottom line is I don't know where to turn at this point. I'm consumed with guilt, so tough love Is not the answer. Does anyone know of a way for me to get back on track to lose weight? Is it really true that it's impossible for me to lose more than 10 pounds?

[Shirley Shirley Parr 20]

Oh, honey, I'm so so very sorry for your dilemma!!! My heart breaks for you!!!! I'm not a surgeon or doctor, but I do believe that nothing is impossible. It sounds like you're already involved in counseling--that would've been my first suggestion. I also know about a group called Celebrate Recovery, which is found all over the country. It's a 12-step, Christ-based program for overcoming "hurts, hangups and habits" of all kinds. You might try to look up your local chapter by googling it. Also, whether you never lose any weight or not, making good food choices is your best bet to stay as healthy as possible. And, who knows, maybe it'll happen for you. But the main thing is to get your mind and heart right!! I pray you'll find some peace.

[1poundatatime 174]

You lost all that weight once, you can do it again. Don't give up on yourself!

Make tomorrow into a new day and just start fresh. Go back to the basics and take it one step at a time .Yes, you'll have to undo some bad habits, but it can be done!