I have been on this forum for about a year and a half. I have seen so many posts of people worrying about excess skin after weight loss. I find this to be incredibly trite and shallow, a roadblock thrown up in the mind to justify the subconscious reasons why we put on and hold the weight to begin with.

First of all, there are of course permanent consequences for getting so big that your skin has to stretch to be twice the size it would be if we were normal weight. It doesn't go back to a state in which it was as if we never were overweight. And so what? What is often unspoken in these forums is that a very overweight person worrying about how they are going to look if they lose weight because of sagging skin, is silly in a society in which obesity is considered ugly to begin with.

More importantly, most of us have the surgery because our bodies and lives were becoming unmanageable due to excess weight, not to look better at speed dating.

For those who are asking the question I have seen posted on this forum a million times, no your skin will not go back to being how it was before your weight gain. There is no cream, no wrap, no swanky magic that's going to make it be as if you were never overweight. The only real option for getting rid of excess skin if you are very overweight when you start, is plastic surgery.

And that comes with its own price. I am not knocking people who choose to have that, I might even choose that eventually, as vanity is one of my flaws. That said, plastic surgery is very very serious, and fairly savage. And still, your body cannot look like it would have if you had never put on weight. They will be scars. Big ones. Surgery of any kind is a serious injury to the body.

The point I am trying to make is that if you are considering having weight-loss surgery to save your life, stop worrying about your skin. Worry about the inner conditions that have led you to the point where this is necessary. Focus instead on changing your behaviors. Focus instead on health, not looks. We have such a distorted view of bodies in this country. Body diversity is beautiful! Stop thinking that you have to look a certain way. Be healthy. Be you.

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Interesting show, The Doctors about young people having wls and the affect on their self esteem and future success in life besides the health benefits

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Is there an administrator on this site because people have been nasty and judgmental from the very first post (trivial? shallow?) and continue in spite of the peace makers. I am new and am disappointed. Are there other sites for support?

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And before I get off this forever Christina.Rose I agree that this not a welcoming site . The first post seemed like an attack on someone. Don't know who it was aimed at but your reply was justified for those who need support and who will probably never ask questions on here again. Little Bill was correct about people complaining about people complaining.

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Oh dear...Some many unresolved emotional ssues. So many personal agendas. So many points that need proving...Must be great to have so much free time.

I had surgery to be pretty. I'm sure I am the only person that had surgery for vanity reasons... okay I mean, I was prediabetic and in a lot of pain and couldn't handle steps, yadda yadda. But me looking at myself in the mirror and hating what I saw was what pushed me over the edge. Being jealous of people who were living full and happy lives did it as well.

I worried some about hair loss and loose skin, because I'm a self pay patient. Skin removal is not always covered by insurance-- in most cases, in fact, I don't believe it is. So I would be looking at an additional expense if I went through with it.

So, yes... people will ask about loose skin because they're thinking ahead. Can I afford to have it removed? Do I want another surgery? Is this decision NOW worth what I will go through in a few years? i have a friend who had RNY who lost a ton of weight but can't afford skin removal, despite the fact that her pannus is beginning to be bothersome. It's a valid question that people ask, and asking here is research.

A little something to remember while you're judging people for looking at the whole picture.

Is there an administrator on this site because people have been nasty and judgmental from the very first post (trivial? shallow?) and continue in spite of the peace makers. I am new and am disappointed. Are there other sites for support?

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Bariatric pal has been the same for years and years. You aren't going to change it by complaining. Block some people, pick your battles, grow thick skin. Get what you need from this site and log off. There are some people here that are aggressive and you're not going to change that by complaining.

Only saying this because I am a vet and there 10,000 threads about how mean people are here. And those threads haven't changed anything.

I do not think there are no people who have surgery for dire medical reasons regardless of the alternate consequences. All I am saying is that I find it ridiculous and am calling BS on people claiming there isn't a "vanity".....and I really consider it to be more of a praying to look different/better for happiness.......aspect to WLS. People who are desperate for weight loss and to feel "normal" and are concerned about trading in fat for skin problems shouldn't be shamed for asking about it. The OP was rude and nasty and I responded with the feeling that I got from that post. and Im 36....not a fossil but not a college kid. Also, I have PCOS, joint deterioration and PTSD to name a few issues I want relief from. I didn't slip through a Psych eval and IDGAF if anyone blocks me. I have every right to ask any question or react to any post just like everyone else here.

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Around the world 18,000 children died of STARVATION in the past hour the past hour and 21,000 children died of PREVENTABLE illness in past 24 hours. Meanwhile he r e on Bariatric Pals an endless parade of precious millennial snowflakes (and their rock puppets spend the whole day "debating" this nonsense.

Maybe it's time to start a Minnesota's only thread where you all can compete to see who is the biggest and best snowflake oall.f

I'm new to this forum as well. I see a lot of posts about other people's post. I made a post about the 180 day weight loss trial and what kind of Protein shakes I should consider.

I felt so much support when I received responses. It made me feel like this is a place that will help me both before and after surgery.

Later I read a thread about how people are sick of questions that have been asked and answered over and over. They werent going to answer any more questions like what kind of Protein shake, etc. anymore.

The point was that newbies should be using the search option. I would have been a lot less embarrassed if the person would have just posted that.

Anyways that is just my opinion as a newbie. Now I skip the my work here is done and tired of people ... threads.

Ironically, I actually clicked on this thread because I was hoping some of my questions about extra skin would be answered.

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Edited December 4, 20169 yr by paradise

I'm 44 and definitely not a millennial nor a delicate snowflake.

I am just a person who plans on having WLS in May with questions and hope for support.

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Oh my everyone. Take what you like and leave the rest.

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I'm 62 years old. I've been over 200 lbs. for all of my adult life, and over 300 for the last 25 years. I started at 334 on 3/11/16 and am currently 209 and would like to get to 170. But I've said from the getgo that I wanted a breast lift/augmentation when my weight stabilizes. Gravity and now this weight loss has left my breasts like tube socks with a couple of marbles in them. Now I won't say there's no vanity in it. But two weeks ago I rolled over on my left breast while sleeping and pulled the holy heck out of it. It's been hurting ever since and am now sleeping in a bralet.

It seems everyone has interpreted the original post differently. My take on it was that she wasn't ranting about people asking questions about excess skin or researching the issue - she was talking about people who are contemplating losing weight and using excess skin as a reason to stay overweight and not take any action. I have seen a lot of those posts too and they make me sad because that person is not ready to make changes yet.

I love that this community is so brutally honest. I am clearly a food addict and a dose of reality (or a swift kick in the pants) is oftentimes sorely needed. Those messages can be a bitter dose to swallow and hard to hear sometimes, but I really want to succeed this time and I want to be called out when I am rationalizing.

I too took it as someone venting on the fact people do use the fear of excess skin as an excuse to not get healthy. As far as plastic surgery goes I don't feel that's vanity following up on several other posts. I'm a strong believer in doing what makes you feel beautiful, if you wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and are excited to see who you are and are able to remember where you came from- that is liberation. I believe we are all worthy of that feeling of freedom.

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I agree with a lot of your sentiment, but let me make one thing perfectly clear.

Most people who have skin surgery after WLS are NOT doing it out of vanity, but out of necessity due to infections and the skin just being a hindrance in functioning normally. So to say it's 'vain' to have surgery to remove skin after WLS is insulting and frankly quite ignorant.

And even if it's done out of vanity, so what? People feel amazing after large losses, and they want to feel even more amazing and have things tightened up and removed. That's their prerogative. And did you know that statistically people are more likely to keep the weight off after having plastic surgery?

Thank you for saying exactly what was on my mind after reading that post. I know that after my WLS my numbers are going to look better. I have exercised and yo-yo ed dusted for years to lose weight for 2 reasons, better health and to look better. I don't want to trade one problem for another problem. Losing weight for extra skin, which can cause odors, sores, infection, and low self-esteem. It drives me nuts when people says it's about vanity when it's not, but about a different tyoe of health problem.

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