Heading to South Florida for Thanksgiving. There will be nine of us. All adults...no children. Mom wanted to make a 16 lb. turkey along with lasagne and assorted sides. I ticked off the names of all the attendees including her and dad. No one other than my sister and possibly the 25 year old young man who is included in the guest list is a big eater. Some of us eat small because we are watching our weight and some are just not big eaters anymore due to illness and old age.

I told mom a 12 lb. turkey would do. Several times in fact. I know that in my family, and likely many others, the greatest sin is not having enough food. As such, there would be tons of it and lots of leftovers...but also lots of overeating. The new mindset is that we have enough. More than enough. Every day I remind myself that food is part of my life, not my life. Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn't. But I try each and every day to eat clean and smart. I have no problem anymore suggesting some of the same to other members of my family.

Now having said that, I suspect when all is said and done, it will be a 16 lb. turkey as my dad will overrule her.

I also suspect that I will be eating turkey till I head back home a week later...

At least it's turkey and not 6 different pies

While I agree we all can and should eat less, I think you may be overstepping on this special day for the other eight adults coming. It may be the last Thanksgiving they decide to eat at mom and dads. And whats Thanksgiving without leftover turkey sandwiches. If you don't want to eat turkey the following week, then leave the leftovers to the other eight adults. It's turkey, its not going to be any more work to cook, just a little longer in the over 16 lbs vs. 12 lbs. as someone else mentioned its not pie or cake. Now I might speak up and say, hey, lets not go overboard with the Desserts.

But I wouldn't get into a pissing match with dad over this. Its suppose to be an enjoyable event and these holidays between Thanksgiving and New Years are stressful enough for many of us. Do not push your new way of eating and living on others unless they ask. It's very annoying.

Speaking of holidays, Happy Halloween.

While I agree we all can and should eat less, I think you may be overstepping on this special day for the other eight adults coming. It may be the last Thanksgiving they decide to eat at mom and dads. And whats Thanksgiving without leftover turkey sandwiches. If you don't want to eat turkey the following week, then leave the leftovers to the other eight adults. It's turkey, its not going to be any more work to cook, just a little longer in the over 16 lbs vs. 12 lbs. as someone else mentioned its not pie or cake. Now I might speak up and say, hey, lets not go overboard with the desserts.

But I wouldn't get into a pissing match with dad over this. Its suppose to be an enjoyable event and these holidays between Thanksgiving and New Years are stressful enough for many of us. Do not push your new way of eating and living on others unless they ask. It's very annoying.

Speaking of holidays, Happy Halloween.

Oh not to worry...in the big picture, I know this is not something to make an issue over. All I was trying to say was that the mindset is just so different than in years past. And actually mom said a 12 lb turkey will be much easier to handle...

Happy Halloween back!

I always did turkey for 8 adults and never got one bigger than 10lbs and we always had lots of leftovers...that is without having lasagna and other "mains" options. 12lbs should be plenty big and then some.

Have a safe and warm voyage.

I agree with how things change. I was out the other morning with friends at a local restaurant and ordered the special. .... eggs, bacon, sausage toast and grits.

I started eating the eggs......offered the toast, sausage and the bacon to the others at the table..... and then as I appeared finished and my bowl of grits remained untouched......my buddy asked if I was going to eat it. I quickly said no.....to help himself to it. I chuckled hearing myself saying that......

In the past, I would have stabbed your hand if you made a gesture after my food.

Go figure

I am the planner of my family and everyone has been waiting for the menu for Thanskgiving for a few days. I pulled up the one from last year and there was so much food I couldn't believe we went through it all. Mind you we have about 50 people for Thanksgiving as it is the one time a year the whole family get together. I was going over the list and wondering do we need 3 different types of potatoes, 2 different stuffings and mac and cheese. Not to mention the multiple apps and desserts. But I had to remember that there are 40 other people that want options and lots of them on this day. Normally I do all of the veggies but this year, I signed up for one app, 2 veggies and 1 dessert. This way I know there will be something healthy that I can eat and not feel like I am just watching everyone else eat. It is my first Thanksgiving since surgery so I don't want to set myself up to make bad choices. Making a shrimp salsa as an app. (we get together at 1 to watch football, dinner isn't until 4) Asparagus and brussel sprouts are my veggie choices this year. No oil, butter but no one will know the difference. Thinking of baked apples for dessert. Hopefully wont have any problems making good choices.

I usually host the big blow out meal for Thanksgiving, with family, cousins and friends who are on their own. This year, we're traveling for a few weeks around Thanksgiving and we'll be in New York. Our children will join us for the holiday. I expect a much smaller turkey, fewer sides and one dessert. Or we go out. But we will definitely line up on the street to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade

It is insane to think about the changes in perception of "how much is enough" happen, after this surgery. I'm into week six now and although the amount I eat continues to grow little by little, it is ridiculous how radically different it is from just two months ago. For dinner, I picked up a small order of green bean chicken at Panda Express. First of all, I made the conscious choice to avoid fried and breaded. Every time I make one of those good choices, I pat myself on the back for putting my brain in check. So far, I have a perfect track record post-surgery. I'm going to be the one in control, now.

But sitting there eating my food (I got ALMOST all the way through it, had about 6 green Beans left in the bottom of the box), I had to chuckle to myself. A couple of months ago, I would not have thought twice while I ordered a three item meal with chow mein, orange chicken, kung pao chicken and beijing beef, with maybe one or two egg rolls and an extra large Pepsi to wash the whole calorie fest down. Almost 2,600 calories just in that meal, alone. My goodness.

Number one, the change in the type of food I am choosing is big...but when I think about the sheer volume of what I used to eat, compared to today...it kind of blows my mind. I order a "normal" portion of food at a restaurant and I swear, it now looks like it could feed a family, to me. My brain is recalibrating...because for several weeks, I found myself fighting against the perception that my portions were "too small" when in fact, they ended up being a little too much.

This is a crazy journey.

Edited November 2, 20169 yr by PorkChopExpress

I usually host the big blow out meal for Thanksgiving, with family, cousins and friends who are on their own. This year, we're traveling for a few weeks around Thanksgiving and we'll be in New York. Our children will join us for the holiday. I expect a much smaller turkey, fewer sides and one dessert. Or we go out. But we will definitely line up on the street to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade

I live in NY and have been to the parade a couple of times. Enjoy it...you will have a blast. If you can, head to the upper west side the night before and watch the balloons being inflated. It's become a big deal now and they have barriers up but when I used to go when the kids were small, you could get up close and personal with all the big balloons.

I love love love all the various dishes at Thanksgiving but I do not like turkey. We are a small gathering of ten (that includes all the extended) so we typically just get a turkey breast and a ham. My biggest pitfall is my mom's dressing. She usually makes two kinds; the stuffing with raisins I grew up with that no one but me really seems to care for and cornbread stuffing.

I only get this dressing once a year and once she is gone, it is gone because she just makes it, no recipe and I can't seem to duplicate it. She knows I had surgery but no one else in the family does and because she doesn't want to call attention to me, she still makes it, knowing I can eat maybe 1/4 cup. I just take home a lot more than I used to. I enjoy every bite. For a few weeks...

My mom's dressing too would be my downfall. Raisins, prunes, ground meat and stale bread, lots of onions, celery and butter.

I love love love all the various dishes at Thanksgiving but I do not like turkey. We are a small gathering of ten (that includes all the extended) so we typically just get a turkey breast and a ham. My biggest pitfall is my mom's dressing. She usually makes two kinds; the stuffing with raisins I grew up with that no one but me really seems to care for and cornbread stuffing.

I only get this dressing once a year and once she is gone, it is gone because she just makes it, no recipe and I can't seem to duplicate it. She knows I had surgery but no one else in the family does and because she doesn't want to call attention to me, she still makes it, knowing I can eat maybe 1/4 cup. I just take home a lot more than I used to. I enjoy every bite. For a few weeks...

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

My mom's dressing too would be my downfall. Raisins, prunes, ground meat and stale bread, lots of onions, celery and butter.

I love love love all the various dishes at Thanksgiving but I do not like turkey. We are a small gathering of ten (that includes all the extended) so we typically just get a turkey breast and a ham. My biggest pitfall is my mom's dressing. She usually makes two kinds; the stuffing with raisins I grew up with that no one but me really seems to care for and cornbread stuffing.

I only get this dressing once a year and once she is gone, it is gone because she just makes it, no recipe and I can't seem to duplicate it. She knows I had surgery but no one else in the family does and because she doesn't want to call attention to me, she still makes it, knowing I can eat maybe 1/4 cup. I just take home a lot more than I used to. I enjoy every bite. For a few weeks...

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Yup. No prunes in hers, but everything else and sausage instead of ground meat.

As usual we will have 12-20 people. I will smoke a turkey the day before and that always goes to my dad. The day of I will smoke another one and my sweetie will roast one. We will also do a ham that my brother in law bought when he was here in September. I plan to have one broccoli ball (broccoli, stuffing, parmesan cheese and an egg as a binder) a couple of "fork fulls" of my mom's recipe sausage rice and pretty much just have some turkey or ham. Either way we are doing 3 turkeys and enough food to feed a small army!

At least it's turkey and not 6 different pies

LOL! I know that's right!