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What has been the hardest part of your journey thus far?



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Honestly this has been the one question that i've been dying to ask everyone who has had wls.

Everyone is different, so what was the biggest change for you?

Was it realizing that you can no longer eat certain foods? Or is it exercise? Or was it emotional changes like depression?

Or anything else you can think of.

I'm just trying to get myself mentally prepared for all of the many changes about to come.

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Right after surgery 2-3 days, you have the overwhelming sense of loss. That maybe they took too much stomach, that there is no turning back, that you are gonna die. But it does go away. That was the worst part for me.

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@@hbrhonda surprisingly that was the one thing i never even thought about. But i'm sure i will right after my surgery.

@@Icantbelieveit oh wow, so it wasn't the types of food you were eating, just the portions that were causing anxiety? For me i think it will be a huge adjustment to realize that i can longer have some of my favorite foods. Because i just don't need them.

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For me the early portion of post-op and weight loss mode really wasn't hard. The weight fell off like magic, I got compliments all the time, I got to buy cute new clothes, I felt fantastic. I didn't have any complications and didn't experience any depression or regret or anxiety after the surgery.

Things got hard for me when I had to lose the last few pounds and transition into maintenance. I had been in denial about some things -- though I would have parroted back some wls sayings to you and swore that I believed them, things like "you have to change your relationship with food" and "you have to commit to this for the rest of your life." As I got closer to maintenance and then into maintenance, I realized that:

--I would have to work hard to maintain my new weight for the rest of my life, for real

--The way I ate in weight loss mode would be very very similar to the way I would have to eat for the rest of my life

--I would not be able to "eat what I want in moderation" and still be successful at maintenance

--I would not be able to have anything like a regular cheat/self-sabotage day or meal in maintenance and still be successful

All of these things did kind of put me in a tailspin. I basically gave up because I just felt defeated -- right at the time I should have been feeling triumphant! I ended up re-gaining about 20 lbs right after I hit my goal weight.

I managed to turn myself around, gave myself a good talking-to about the idiocy of feeling sorry for myself, and worked hard to get those 20 lbs off again.

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Before surgery, it was fear for my husbands life, and my fear of the unknown.

After surgery it was fear of what the hell is going to happen now, I will act like I am pitiful and post surgery.

Two days later I was walking in the grocery store.

Four days later I was in the mall, visualize what I might buy one day. I had a little cheese stick and Protein Shake with me so I would not be hungry, and damn!!! I never got hungry! Amaaaaaaazzzzziiiinnng!

Three years post op, NO FEAR!

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@@Bufflehead thank you!!! That's exactly what i wasn't sure about. I know i can do it but i know it's going to be hard. At the end of the day, how we're deciding to lose weight is different from most people so how we stay on track will be different too. It's sounds ok to hear but i'm sure once i actually am in that stage i'll know just how hard it is to maintain my new lifestyle. The no cheat meals will be hard for sure.

I think for me personally i'm going to meet with my dietician a few times after my surgery.

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@@hbrhonda surprisingly that was the one thing i never even thought about. But i'm sure i will right after my surgery.

@@Icantbelieveit oh wow, so it wasn't the types of food you were eating, just the portions that were causing anxiety? For me i think it will be a huge adjustment to realize that i can longer have some of my favorite foods. Because i just don't need them.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I never worried about not having a certain food ever again, because if I am that crazy about whatever food in time I can have it. Even if it isb3yrs down the road.

But the thought of no big bowl of Pasta, big plate of XYZ is out the window because of the physical impossibility actually gave me anxiety. I wasnt a big eater all the time, just a bad eater. So it took me off guard that this would be an issue.Wasn't a thought before surgery really.

I still have anxiety about eating a larger portion than I can handle, even with portioning. Paranoid about stretching my pouch. Paranoid if the portion will trigger me to stop losing. When I watch 600lb life and they dont lose or actually gain after surgery and I see their portion sizes, I always wonder how they can eat that amount.

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For me the early portion of post-op and weight loss mode really wasn't hard. The weight fell off like magic, I got compliments all the time, I got to buy cute new clothes, I felt fantastic. I didn't have any complications and didn't experience any depression or regret or anxiety after the surgery.

Things got hard for me when I had to lose the last few pounds and transition into maintenance. I had been in denial about some things -- though I would have parroted back some wls sayings to you and swore that I believed them, things like "you have to change your relationship with food" and "you have to commit to this for the rest of your life." As I got closer to maintenance and then into maintenance, I realized that:

--I would have to work hard to maintain my new weight for the rest of my life, for real

--The way I ate in weight loss mode would be very very similar to the way I would have to eat for the rest of my life

--I would not be able to "eat what I want in moderation" and still be successful at maintenance

--I would not be able to have anything like a regular cheat/self-sabotage day or meal in maintenance and still be successful

All of these things did kind of put me in a tailspin. I basically gave up because I just felt defeated -- right at the time I should have been feeling triumphant! I ended up re-gaining about 20 lbs right after I hit my goal weight.

I managed to turn myself around, gave myself a good talking-to about the idiocy of feeling sorry for myself, and worked hard to get those 20 lbs off again.

Yes on EVERYTHING you just said!!!

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Not being able to eat or take in a lot of fluids! I'm 8 days post op and I still can't have more than 3-4 bites. I had a terrible hernia that was repaired during surgery so my healing is progressing very slow. Thank goodness for popsicles!

I wonder.... When will it get better? What will my normal diet consist of?

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It will get better. My husband and I, and so many many people here, had hernia repairs during surgery. Just keep sipping. Look toward the prize!

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Long term maintenance has definitely been the toughest.

Looking back, Those first couple years were so exciting and easy. It may not have seemed that way at the time, of course. There was the liquid diets, the diarrhea, the Constipation, the fatigue, missing out on eating a lot of good foods, struggling to stay hydrated, the emotional break downs, etc. But these things were all temporary and the perceived sacrifices were rewarded with weight loss, lots of NSVs and a new wardrobe!

But maintenance is forever. Its boring, NSVs are nearly nonexistent and the scale doesn't really move unless it's in the wrong direction. You have to be diligent and stay on plan day after day after day. Like Bufflehead said, the way you eat to lose is very close to how you will have to eat to maintain....for the rest of your life! I have no doubt I Would not be able to do this without the psychological tools I got from my therapist and from the support and advice from those that went before me.

You are doing exactly what you need to be doing....asking lots of questions. The better prepared and informed you are, the better you will be able to deal with all the little negatives along the way. A good attitude and keeping your energy focused on the long term rewards will go a long ways in making everything easier.

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For me the early portion of post-op and weight loss mode really wasn't hard. The weight fell off like magic, I got compliments all the time, I got to buy cute new clothes, I felt fantastic. I didn't have any complications and didn't experience any depression or regret or anxiety after the surgery.

Things got hard for me when I had to lose the last few pounds and transition into maintenance. I had been in denial about some things -- though I would have parroted back some wls sayings to you and swore that I believed them, things like "you have to change your relationship with food" and "you have to commit to this for the rest of your life." As I got closer to maintenance and then into maintenance, I realized that:

--I would have to work hard to maintain my new weight for the rest of my life, for real

--The way I ate in weight loss mode would be very very similar to the way I would have to eat for the rest of my life

--I would not be able to "eat what I want in moderation" and still be successful at maintenance

--I would not be able to have anything like a regular cheat/self-sabotage day or meal in maintenance and still be successful

All of these things did kind of put me in a tailspin. I basically gave up because I just felt defeated -- right at the time I should have been feeling triumphant! I ended up re-gaining about 20 lbs right after I hit my goal weight.

I managed to turn myself around, gave myself a good talking-to about the idiocy of feeling sorry for myself, and worked hard to get those 20 lbs off again.

This is a beautiful and honest post, and I couldn't agree more.

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It will get better. My husband and I, and so many many people here, had hernia repairs during surgery. Just keep sipping. Look toward the prize!

It's good to know that I'm not alone. I will continue to sip until it gets better! I just wish I knew how long! ????

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
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    • Doughgurl

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      1. Phil Penn

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      3. Doughgurl

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
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      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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