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Afternoon all!

I'm writing this on a super awesome day: my one-year post op date! This day last year, I weighed 387 pounds and was in recovery after my bypass. This day two years ago, I weighed 450 pounds and saw very little hope of making it past 30. Today I am 207 pounds and perfectly healthy. How times change.

I've learned so, so much in the last two years since I started down this road towards health and happiness. Some of the things I learned were tough lessons, some of them were illuminating and freeing, but all of them together have brought me here. "Here" is a place I never in a million years thought I could be. "Here" is an entirely different Abby, an Abby I thought was sort of a childish dream, or maybe a fairy-tale I told myself to comfort myself during the painful years I spent being obese and incredibly unhappy and uncomfortable.

I still struggle every day with the person I was, the person I am, and the person I am becoming. I struggle to regain my self-image, and to regain an understanding of who I am outside and inside. I struggle with the social and emotional changes that have happened since my surgery, namely the way that people suddenly treat me like a human being because I am no longer painfully obese. I struggle to forgive the cruelty that I experienced at the hands of so, so many people, including my own family and friends. Including myself. I struggle with food cravings occasionally, and with the gravity of the change my personality and habits have gone through. I struggle with that tiny voice of fear in the back of my mind that tells me I couldn't possibly keep this goodness up. I struggle not to compare myself to others and I struggle to keep clothes on my back as I continue to drop sizes. Every day is a struggle.

Every day is also a miracle. I would do this again, and again, and again... forever if I needed to, if it would bring me back here every time. This road has been a little bitter, a lot of sweet, and a wilder ride than I could have possibly imagined or prepared for.

And it ain't over yet!

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you here who have been a part of this journey with me, whether you realized it or not. Thank you to all the vets who slapped some sense into me and the kind strangers who listened during times when my anxiety was out of control or when I was feeling so bad about myself that I felt hopeless. You all share a little piece of my victory with me. I wouldn't be here without you and the enormous host of other people outside of this site who have supported me and encouraged me and been proud of me the whole way. THANK YOU. I have a life now, and a future that simply did not exist for me two years ago.

I am ecstatic to be able to share these pictures and my progress with you all today. I love you all.

<3 Cervidae (Abby)

Stats!

Starting weight: 450 lbs

Surgery weight: 387 lbs

Current weight: 207 lbs

Weight lost since surgery: 180 lbs

Overall weight lost: 243 lbs

Jean sizes lost: 20 (size 34 to size 14)

Waist inches lost: 28 in

Hips inches lost: 35 in

Neck inches lost: 4 in

Shoe size lost: 1.5 sizes

Aaaw this brought tears to my eyes congratulations beautiful. You got this keep up the great work. I fully understand the way that your feeling thank you so much for sharing this with us.

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Afternoon all!

I'm writing this on a super awesome day: my one-year post op date! This day last year, I weighed 387 pounds and was in recovery after my bypass. This day two years ago, I weighed 450 pounds and saw very little hope of making it past 30. Today I am 207 pounds and perfectly healthy. How times change.

I've learned so, so much in the last two years since I started down this road towards health and happiness. Some of the things I learned were tough lessons, some of them were illuminating and freeing, but all of them together have brought me here. "Here" is a place I never in a million years thought I could be. "Here" is an entirely different Abby, an Abby I thought was sort of a childish dream, or maybe a fairy-tale I told myself to comfort myself during the painful years I spent being obese and incredibly unhappy and uncomfortable.

I still struggle every day with the person I was, the person I am, and the person I am becoming. I struggle to regain my self-image, and to regain an understanding of who I am outside and inside. I struggle with the social and emotional changes that have happened since my surgery, namely the way that people suddenly treat me like a human being because I am no longer painfully obese. I struggle to forgive the cruelty that I experienced at the hands of so, so many people, including my own family and friends. Including myself. I struggle with food cravings occasionally, and with the gravity of the change my personality and habits have gone through. I struggle with that tiny voice of fear in the back of my mind that tells me I couldn't possibly keep this goodness up. I struggle not to compare myself to others and I struggle to keep clothes on my back as I continue to drop sizes. Every day is a struggle.

Every day is also a miracle. I would do this again, and again, and again... forever if I needed to, if it would bring me back here every time. This road has been a little bitter, a lot of sweet, and a wilder ride than I could have possibly imagined or prepared for.

And it ain't over yet!

From the bottom of my heart, thank you to all of you here who have been a part of this journey with me, whether you realized it or not. Thank you to all the vets who slapped some sense into me and the kind strangers who listened during times when my anxiety was out of control or when I was feeling so bad about myself that I felt hopeless. You all share a little piece of my victory with me. I wouldn't be here without you and the enormous host of other people outside of this site who have supported me and encouraged me and been proud of me the whole way. THANK YOU. I have a life now, and a future that simply did not exist for me two years ago.

I am ecstatic to be able to share these pictures and my progress with you all today. I love you all.

<3 Cervidae (Abby)

Stats!

Starting weight: 450 lbs

Surgery weight: 387 lbs

Current weight: 207 lbs

Weight lost since surgery: 180 lbs

Overall weight lost: 243 lbs

Jean sizes lost: 20 (size 34 to size 14)

Waist inches lost: 28 in

Hips inches lost: 35 in

Neck inches lost: 4 in

Shoe size lost: 1.5 sizes

You are amazing!! Congratulations! Well written.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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Abby, congrats on the NEW amazing you. Thanks for sharing the good and bad.

Continued blessings to you. Stay positive.

Sent from my SM-N920V using the BariatricPal App

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Not only did you lose weight, you lost age. You look 20 years younger from the change! Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Congrats.

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    • LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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