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I hate shopping...wait, what?



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I know, cute clothes, off the rack sizes but oh my goodness what do I choose?

We have had guidelines for food, exercise and everything health related but I need some fashion guidance.

I haven't been able to wear this size since I was in High School and things sure have changed in the last 20+ years. I go to the stores and aimlessly walk around lost.

Ugh, I thought this would be the fun part.

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I used to shop online almost everyday because i knew my size and I had places I knew what size I wore there.

Now shopping takes hours because I have to try ever single thing on, every single time I go shopping. Even if I haven't lost weight, that doesn't mean I haven't lost inches. *sigh*

Also I am not navigating a lot of new stores and new sections and it is just a journey of its own.

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There's a book which addresses, among other things, the question of discovering or defining one's tastes/identify after surgery. I've written a bit more about it in response to others' posts. I also wrote a review on the first edition at Amazon a few years back. As I recall, I was most struck by the material on finding one's identity in regard to your topic. Here's a link from the author's website to the new edition.

http://www.drtaniekabala.com/book

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Just think though....when you know exactly what you like, you spend SO much money. Think of all the money you're saving right now while your figuring it all out!

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Just think though....when you know exactly what you like, you spend SO much money. Think of all the money you're saving right now while your figuring it all out!

Very true. I mostly stay in sweats and tees but today we had a party to go to and I wanted something that fit.

I felt overwhelmed. I may have to grab some friends to help.

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There's a book which addresses, among other things, the question of discovering or defining one's tastes/identify after surgery. I've written a bit more about it in response to others' posts. I also wrote a review on the first edition at Amazon a few years back. As I recall, I was most struck by the material on finding one's identity in regard to your topic. Here's a link from the author's website to the new edition.

http://www.drtaniekabala.com/book

That link is not working, can you give us the title of the book or the author?

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@@gina171, sorry about that. This link indicates "ebook," but is good for the paperback as well.

(Edited: Another link that won't work

Title: "The Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion:

A Practical Guide to Coping with Post-Surgery Emotions"

Author: Tanie Miller Kabala, Ph.D.)

http://www.amazon.com/Weight-Loss-Surgery-Coping-Companion-ebook

I have the revised and the original editions, but haven't taken time to compare them. If it means anything, this is the review of the original edition that I wrote in Amazon: "With so much written about weight-loss surgery itself, it's good to have Dr. Kabala's book as a guide through the emotional aspects of weight loss. It addresses clearly the familiar doubts, fears and obstacles. There is space for responses to the written exercises, but it would be smart to write everything in a separate journal. A journal becomes the record of our evolving emotional (and physical) landscapes and our growth through the weight loss journey. The most eye-opening chapter for me is "How to Cope with Identity Confusion." Dr. Kabala was wise to include clothing choices, as clothing is a big part of how we express our personalities. The large questions that arise with significant weight loss -- Who am I? What do I like? What do I want? How will I express myself in ways that feel comfortable? -- are given clarity and a format for finding answers. Because the book is about dealing with the common roadblocks, people who are considering surgery can benefit from it, too. I think the same holds for people who are losing weight without surgery."

Edited by WLSResources/ClothingExch

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CATO store, I just Love it! Women's clothes at affordable prices. One side is Women's 1x and up, other side is XL and down. Modest yet style! Co-ordinated together outfits on display so you can mix and match. I go there and always fall in Love with something. I'm not plugging the store for any other reason than the fact it works for all sizes. And I feel excited when I leave.

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FYI: 5 years ago I lost 65 lbs and did it drastically in 3.5 months without surgery. I went through an emotional roller coaster ride. #1 I didn't recognize my self in the reflection. I found myself crying in the dressing room because of the fact I was so disconnected from that person.

#2. Before surgery I gained it ail back and some due to thyroid disease called Graves brought on by diet and genes. Had thyroid removed. Not able to get the weight off on my own.

#3. Surgery now and am down enough to go shopping and fit into cute clothes. Except now I am able to come to terms with this immediate issue. Because now I realized since the things that matter to me.

Asking myself this question: " Do I like how I look, and am I proud of what My image in the mirror says about me?" Only you can answer that!

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I completely understand. I used to be able to order clothes online, and they arrives at my doorstep. Now, I have to try everything on, usually, I go back to get 2 sizes smaller, as I can not mentally adjust to my goal soze, which I attained. Then, once I find something that fits, agonize over whether I should buy it, as it may not fit next month. The price we pay to be healthy and at goal weight. Maybe I will adjust someday, but the downside is far outweighed by my benefits.

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I know, cute clothes, off the rack sizes but oh my goodness what do I choose?

We have had guidelines for food, exercise and everything health related but I need some fashion guidance.

I haven't been able to wear this size since I was in High School and things sure have changed in the last 20+ years. I go to the stores and aimlessly walk around lost.

Ugh, I thought this would be the fun part.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I love the brand INC by Macys, and look forward to wearing their regular misses sizes: http://www1.macys.com/shop/womens-clothing/inc-international-concepts-womens-apparel?id=3481

In store and online they consistently have sales, and the pieces are good quality and last. Pieces mix and match well, and they are classy but comfortable designs. The pants often have the nice tummy tightener waist, (which I know I will appreciate with loose skin around my abdomen as I lose more)

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Since my weight loss I am excited to go into "normal" shops and I feel the begining of another addiction....... Shopping!!! But there are times when I wonder what my style is????? Never the less, I sometimes just go into stores to try on the clothes to see how my shape is changing ..... I've also noticed I have now moved from my traditional anything in black to more vibrant colours. Loving my band

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The better department stores have personal shoppers: bergdorfs, neimans, nordstroms, saks etc. and they also do alterations in house.

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Sail away. I also adore inc clothes. Macy's carries them here and I find I like their sizing and cut.

They cost a bit but I usually have a Macy's coupon or promotion so it takes some of the sting out of shopping there. I find that brands quality is very good .

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I am so with you!!! I am currently on a shopping trip and don't even want to shop. I don't know where to go, what style to buy, and don't feel good spending money on things that I hope won't ft soon anyway.

I'm down 90 pounds with about another 100ish to go so I need new clothing but also still have a ton to lose.

I actually hate shopping now. And I sued to love it.

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    • LeighaTR

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      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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