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Learning from my mistakes



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I wrote a post last week (or maybe the week before) about getting to the point where I normally start to fail. Losing the same 15-20 pounds, feeling good, dropping a size, and then BAM, I'm back to my old habits. It's really hard to shake the feeling of "time to fail" now that I'm below 290 (very difficult for me to stay there in the past). So last Thursday I weighed myself and I was 287, meaning I didn't lose any weight in 2 weeks. I freaked out and kind of went on a bender over the weekend. Well, as much of a bender as I could with my new limitations.

I stuffed myself with mostly carbs, drinking Water to push them through faster. Healthy, no? Had some Dairy Queen ice cream. Indulged in a mini Cookies and milk binge (those slide through nicely). My brain was telling me it's over, time to gain the weight back, this is as light as I'll ever be able to force myself to be... And it hurt, physically, to push myself like that but I did it anyway. Brains are very, very complicated and sometimes extremely stupid. It's like I was on autopilot. A zombie. Brain told me that because I'm having a bad month I deserved to eat what I wanted to get by. I couldn't make it shut up.

But then I woke up today and told myself the lap band is still there. It's still restricting my intake. I can do this. I need to drink more Water which helps overcome the carb cravings. I need to listen to my body. STOP BEFORE IT HURTS. Protein and veggies first. I'm getting another fill in a couple weeks and that will help even more. I'm going to exercise tonight.

Wow, what a horrible mental and emotional hurdle to pass. But I can do this. This time it IS different. Listen up, Brain, it is NOT TIME TO FAIL. It is time to overcome and move on. These size 22's will get looser and I'll be in size 20 in a couple months! It's go time!

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I have the same history. I have the sleeve. I have lost 30 pounds and stopped for two weeks (actually gain 3 pounds loose 3 pounds for two weeks). but I just sat and entered my food from all weekend today- into my thing I log it on/ and I am *not* eating enough to gain any FAT. so it has to be different, it will pass.

I did try on a pair of jeans this weekend that 6 months ago I could not pull up - two weeks ago were probably 2 inches from buttoning and they fit perfectly now. So, things are changing and that will have to be enough of a victory for this week.

keep going, one day at a time.

Edited by Christinamo7

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YOU CAN DO THIS!!! YOU WILL SUCCEED!!!

Don't let stinkin' thinkin' get in the way of your success!! Remember -- nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.

As I'm typing this, I'm telling myself the same thing because I've been stuck in the same 7 lb. range for 6 months. Every day, every week I keep plugging along and working to getting back to doing what I know I am supposed to be doing -- Protein, Protein, protein, Water, Water, water, walk, walk, walk - to keep it simple. And.....log log log that food in somewhere. Accountability by tracking my food and exercise helps keep me honest with myself. I don't have to prove anything to anyone. I did this for me. I am doing this for me and my health.

WE CAN DO THIS!!!

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I get those mind hungers too. Especially with carbs because I have always been a carboholic. Now that I am able to eat more foods and drink my wine I really have to watch it and log everything. I have been at a stall for several weeks now and I would really like to get to goal so I have to stay focused on the fitness part I guess because I am only taking in 1500-1800 calories per day.

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I have my metabolic rate checked at surgeons office, and I was told not to exceed 1100 calories a day, ad I am same height as betty boop, just a suggestion, why are you consuming so many calories, i am 8 1/2 months out, seems like alot to me, not judging just telling you how my program is.

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Seems like we all have our bumps in the road. But keep driving!! The magic bus is moving if you just stop hindering it.

This seems to be where our head tries to remind us that this is what we have always done....gone so far and sabotage ourselves. Hopefully your new tool (band or sleeve ) helps you to see you can keep going.

This time can be different if you get right back on your program and do the Protein, Water and perhaps a walk.

This can be the "oops I made a quick error and now I'm back " moment. That can literally be the difference between all the yo- yo, stop and start, and I'll begin again later pattern that got me personally over 250 lbs.

think of it in the past and keep going. String together good days. And good weeks... Are there off moments? Yes I believe there are. No one can be perfect ( or rather mostly)

But this surgery can work in the LONG RUN. Which is why you tried a new way, yeah? The old ways don't work!

I'm encouraging you to readjust yourself and keep going.

Please keep posting. There is a caring community here to help. Best to you.

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I dont know if this will help. I just got these book titles off another thread 5 mi utes ago, so I have not read any of them, but they were recommended by members of this site. "Intuitive Eating"byEllen Trimbole; "The Emotional First Aid Kit" by Cynthia Alexander. I was thinking of getting them for myself.

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Hi sbg224:

The Nutritionist at my surgeons office told me the reason I was at a stall was because I was not getting enough calories and said I need to increase up to 1500. I would feel better at 1200 so I may have to take your advice and go back down because I am still at a stall with her advice. Thank you

I have my metabolic rate checked at surgeons office, and I was told not to exceed 1100 calories a day, ad I am same height as betty boop, just a suggestion, why are you consuming so many calories, i am 8 1/2 months out, seems like alot to me, not judging just telling you how my program is.

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Thanks for the encouragement everyone! I'm doing much better now :) kept my eating on track yesterday and going strong today. When I stick with Protein and drink enough Water then my cravings go away. I just need to remember that when I have a moment of weakness and want simple carbs. Self-destructive benders are not the best way to cope with stress or set-backs.

I didn't know surgeons could check our metabolic rates! I may have to ask for that at my next appointment! I'd be curious to see how much I actually need to eat in a day.

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One of the biggest lessons of this process for me was to learn that stalls are a normal, natural, and necessary part of the process. None of us lose at a constant or steady rate, and periodic stalls are to be expected. Once I got my head around this concept, I had a lot of peace.

Embrace the Stall!

Embrace the Stall

http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

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I read the emotional first aid kit and thought it was great. Intuitive eating I tried years ago, and I asked the NUT when does this start and she said it could be tomorrow, 2 years or never, so dropped that concept. You should check with your nut, but at Cedars sinai in LA where I had the surgery, there is a scale, sort of and it measures so many things, the weight of each arm and leg, metabolic rate etc, hope your doc has one, and that is where it says 1100 calories is my limit or I will gain weight. My next appointment 5/12 I will have them do it again and see if it changes. Good luck.

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      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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