Hi Everyone!

Over the course of the last two weeks, some of you may know that I have been struggling with the most horrific left side pain known to mankind. The incision area, that my surgeon playfully likes to refer to as the place where "the magic happens", has been troublesome and pulling and nagging and even gave me a friendly little muscle spasm earlier this week. I have been immobile, I have been crying harder than I've ever cried and I have endured all of this pain without pain meds. I'm pretty sure my husband and children are afraid of me. LOL

Because of the pain and lack of mobility, I have been having buyer's remorse. With every day that has passed, I have continually asked myself "What did I get myself into?" "What have I done to myself?" "Was this worth it?"

Today I got all of my questions answered.

Today I went to my two week post-op appointments with my surgeon and nutritionist. I stepped on the scale and closed my eyes and told the MA to tell me when to open. I heard her say "wow!" and I couldn't help but open my eyes. I had lost 20 pounds since surgery! TWENTY POUNDS!!! With the 30 I lost pre-op, I have lost a grand total of 50 pounds!!! I AM ON THE LOSER'S BENCH!

I started to cry. My husband teared up a little too I think, because he knows how hard I've struggled with my weight over the course of my life and our relationship and with the insurance and all of the pain. Two weeks, 20 pounds..what an amazing feeling!

I won't go into details on the appointment itself, because it was normal post-op appointment, but I will share the fact that my blood pressure was the best it has been since I was in my 20s, possibly my teens. When I was in the hospital after surgery, my blood pressure was a major issue, so to see that my numbers were normal was astounding.

The meeting with my nutritionist was just as expected. She told me I wasn't getting enough Protein in, but I knew that already. It is something I'm struggling with and she told me to go ahead and move onto the RTD shakes (Premier Protein, specifically, because of their high protein content), which I was thrilled about because I hate the Protein powder they have me currently on. She noted that my liquid intake was good, but could be better (I knew that too!) and gave me some food/snack tips for my trip to Disneyland next month, which was incredibly helpful.

After I left this appointment I stopped and cried some more because I was so overwhelmed by the progress I have made thus far. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that only two weeks out, I would've lost 20 pounds, nevertheless 50 pounds in a month. Those brief moments of tears were freeing and exciting and it made me realize that everything I have gone through to get to this point has been worth every agonizing, frustrating, tiring and painful minute.

My questions then became "What took me so long to do this?" "Why did I doubt my choice?"

I knew going into this that it wasn't going to be easy, and it took me a while to get here, but now I know it has most definitely been worth it.

Here's to the next 20 pounds!!!

xoxo,

Niki

Edited September 17, 201510 yr by Nikikins

@@Dream4tc I actually really like my surgeon. I was not at all thrilled that he wouldn't prescribe me more pain medication but he had his reasons (a lot to do with patients abusing the pills, the pills slow down the healing process and wreak havoc on your system). I guess as a doctor I have to respect what he said, but at the time I wanted to shove his reasons down his throat! LOL I do like him though and will not hold this against him.

My PCP did not help, he referred me back to my surgeon. I do not like my PCP at all.

My pain is no longer as severe as it was during that time (or earlier this week even) and I can move and be more mobile. I am still in pain but it is not nearly as bad, so I feel like I probably am at a point now where walking it off might be an option. Before it wasn't, but now I think it's possible.

I'm just going to move forward on this journey and know that it'll get better and easier as @@Amylou said earlier!

You are alot nicer than I would be. I can understand his concern with patient abusing narcotics. I worked on a drug detox unit for 5 years caring for opiate addicted patients. There is a difference .....you just had major surgery and only 1 week out!!!. If you were 1 month out and still wanting pain medication every 4 hours....then yes I would question and try to find out the underlying problem.

I have worked CV-NEURO ICU, CV- Step down, Med Surg, Ortho, OB, Drug detox and now in management. He really doesn't make sense to me. Pain control can actually heal you much faster. It will allow for better mobility and get our patients up and moving to prevent further problems like DVT or PE (blood clots in legs or lungs), pneumonia, etc. I really don't understand his logic, but I work with surgeons and Dr's with his thought process.

I am glad you like him and glad you are on the mend. You are doing exceptionally well!!!! I just have a problem with physicians not helping patients and being insensitive when it comes to pain. I care about others too much. I guess it's in my nature because the nurse is on the front lines assessing and caring for the patient. We are the eyes and ears of the physician. His skill is the surgery, not the pain control.

Changes have occurred with physician payment reumbursements. Now physicians rely on patient satisfaction scores......

I am so sorry about your PCP. I bet that was frustrating also. If you ever have surgery again.... Call me.... I will be your advocate <3

@@Dream4tc I appreciate you looking out for me and I completely understand where you're coming from! I thought the same thing, that managing the pain would allow for me to walk and move and heal, but there was nothing I could do to change his mind. But, I can't carry it with me! I'm trying to learn to let things go more and enjoy life with this second chance!

Btw, I loved my nurses more than I love my surgeon! They were AMAZING! So thank you for all that you do

Congrats! I wanna be where you are! Yes, I'm jealous! Go! Go! Go!

FANTASTIC!

Yay, Yay, YAY!! Oh I am soooooooooo happy for you!! :)

So proud of you for hanging in there and staying strong! ???? congrats ????

Congrats on the weight loss.

Thanks to all of you for the well wishes!

I'm struggling again with a different kind of left side pain; now it feels like it's burning and muscle aches instead of pulling and tugging. It is radiating to my back BIG TIME. I am pushing through it though because I know this will go away eventually!

All of you are my inspirations, keep up the good work everyone!

xoxo