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Passing For Thin - Support Thread for Those Approaching Goal



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Jaqui - you totally crack me up girl! You're far from a "crusty"! Congrats on the 77kg!!! ;) And great reminder that we need to mentally adjust our calorie burn as we get slender!

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Jachut,

Do you ever do speed intervals when running? You'll be amazed at how many more cals you burn when you do them, and they're not that hard, proportionately.

In case you haven't done them (or for anyone else who is interested), try this: run your slow to normal speed until you're warmed up. Then run as fast as you can for 45 seconds. Return to your slow to normal speed for 5 minutes. Repeat for the duration of your run.

It's a killer plateau breaker.

Yea for the 77kg!

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I havent for ages, I really should.

I do circuit training 3x per week though and that is very "interval" style - bursts of very high heart rate with lifting heavy weights - the running on the treadmill is the easy bit!

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:)

Jachut,

Do you ever do speed intervals when running? You'll be amazed at how many more cals you burn when you do them, and they're not that hard, proportionately.

In case you haven't done them (or for anyone else who is interested), try this: run your slow to normal speed until you're warmed up. Then run as fast as you can for 45 seconds. Return to your slow to normal speed for 5 minutes. Repeat for the duration of your run.

It's a killer plateau breaker.

Yea for the 77kg!

Thanks for this, I've never heard of it before. I'm going to try it.

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Eficka, welcome back! Two pounds can melt off very quickly. (From one chocoholic to anotherm go sugar-free for a bit!) The hiking sounds wonderful. I'm envisioning the Von Trapp family hiking in the mountains of Austria, singing and all. Is it anything like that?

It was a gorgeous day here today at the beach in Malibu. The bit of sunburn made running difficult, though.

Thanks for all of the insight, everyone.

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I can't wait until I can honestly write here--that I lost my 107 pounds. So far I am 1/3 the way..I can't wait to pass for thin. My goal is to look like I did when I was 30 to 32 years of age. I guess those was the years I was at my best.- I was about 170 to 178 Pounds--nice 33 inch waist and plenty of energy

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I am only 3 lbs from my surgeon's original goal weight for me. He said, 162 would put me at a healthy BMI and we'd shoot for that and reevaluate. Recently he adjusted it down to 150, which seems reasonable to me.

The problem I'm having is one of contradiction. When I look in the mirror I see myself as I always was. Not the thin teenaged me or the highest-weight middle-aged me. Just the same face. Yes, I can now see my collarbones and when I lie down can see my hipbones. But I don't see a thin person.

When I see people at work that haven't seen me in awhile, many comment on how great I look. It sort of confuses me because I don't feel it.

I know I'm thinner, I can see that on the scale. I know I'm smaller because when I hold up my underpants to put them on it surprises me daily that they look so small in my hands. But my mind really can't wrap itself around the true picture. I guess my concept needs to change of exactly what a size 14 looks like. Maybe photos will help.

So here's another contradiction. When I run into people I haven't seen since before the surgery and there's no reaction at all, I get a little annoyed. I think, "Well, don't you even notice that I've lost the equivalent to a third grader? Come on, tell me how great I look!"

Then I still feel like the fat girl at the table when eating out and think everyone is watching everything I put in my mouth. If a staff member comes into my office when I'm snacking on some almonds, I feel a little ashamed, like I have no business consuming calories.

I don't think my mind is ready to accept goal weight and the lifestyle it entails.

Anyone else struggle with these issues?

Paging Dr. Freud!

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When I look in the mirror I see myself as I always was. Not the thin teenaged me or the highest-weight middle-aged me. Just the same face.

Me too, mariecarmen. I think this is part of the adjustment problem we're having. Since we only ever saw the face and it was only subtly different, we didn't accept the reality of how big we are and, thus, the reality of how much we have changed with the weight loss.

Yes, I can now see my collarbones and when I lie down can see my hipbones. But I don't see a thin person.

Again, me too. I see "fat" arms and legs and that's about it. Part of me knows that's just excess skin and there can't be that much more fat to lose, but whether skin or fat, I feel fat.

I know I'm smaller because when I hold up my underpants to put them on it surprises me daily that they look so small in my hands.

I do that too -- daily. How can those tiny things fit me, yet I feel so fat? It's illogical.

When I run into people I haven't seen since before the surgery and there's no reaction at all, I get a little annoyed.

Yeah. I hear that. I told my Mom to just know that it's not possible to say the right thing to me. If she comments on the weight loss too much, I'll be annoyed that "all I am is weight loss." But if she doesn't comment, I'm annoyed that she doesn't acknowledge it. It's the same with other people -- they can't win with me. I've worked through this a little. It's hard to comment on someone's weight, even when it's for the better. When I feel that annoyance, I try to remember that.

If a staff member comes into my office when I'm snacking on some almonds, I feel a little ashamed, like I have no business consuming calories.

Again, yep. I could have written that. Guilt and shame and food go hand in hand for me, even when I'm eating what I'm "supposed" to. Now that you say that though, I do feel like this is a place where I could make some progress. I can choose to react differently when someone "catches" me eating. I'm going to choose not to feel ashamed about that anymore, starting today. I think I'm ready for that.

Thanks for identifying so many things to talk about mariecarmen. Yes, I think many of us feel like you do.

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To add what you're seeing. I think it'smore about accepting yourself as the "New and Improved" person. Sometimes I get compliments on how much weight I lossed--but I am only 1/3 of the way there. When I am asked about how much I'll lose. I get a shocked remark--"Why so much? I am 5'9 and I am supposed to be 163 lbs too. I am hoping that I can look in the mirror and see my collar bones too. I still see a fat guy even though I am 235 or lighter. I started at 273. I can't weight to see that 1 as the first number. It will make me feel accomplished as a person. The lap band is a tool for all of us. I am just like any other human--we skip sometimes--eat the wrong food, I have had the days when i said--Ok...I had that cake last night--even though it was tiny. I lower my calorie intact the next day.Like I'm doing today--but still eating(small).

We have to get to that acceptance thing within us. If I adjusted my weight to 150--that is me as a 17, 18 and 19 year old. I would wonder how I will accept that. Many will think all sorts of things--but who cares. All we are seeking here is some sort of "Longevity". Hoping that less weight equal less desease, less hassles with clothes--shopping at the normal stores. Buying the normal foods, getting acceptance into a society that thinks "Thin"--but with over 50% of the nation now over-weight or fat...sad--but you are doing GREAT...Don't doubt it...

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I have to admit that I get tired of hearing how wonderful I look and how much weight I have lost! I know I should be appreciative, and I really am. The problem I have is when it is all I hear when I see people. My MIL goes on and on everytime I see her and tells everyone around us about my lap band and how much weight I have lost. I keep thinking "was I really that bad before?" or is she just trying to make me feel good. I get it at work alot with certain people too. I get tired of my weight being such a big issue all the time. I guess thats what I wanted to get away from when I got the band. I don't want to obsess about my weight anymore.

Sorry about the rant, I just got back from dinner with in laws!

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Hello, I am glad I stopped in today to read this thread. I am not anywhere close to goal. I get really discouraged because I can't seem to lose. I had a resting metabolic test taken and it showed I have an extremely slow metabolism.

I read the post about the plateau breaker. I usually do 30 min on the elliptical and 30 min on the treadmill. Do you think that I should skip the elliptical (I call it the elliptiKILL) and concentrate on learning to run faster?

I really need help. I have had the band going on 7 months and it drives me crazy to never see the scale move. This week I am doing liquids because I saw the dr. on Wed. and he said that might help the plateau.

I should also say that I have been doing weight training for over 3 years. I joined a gym 3 years ago when the weight just kept creeping up. It didn't seem to help, so I got the band.

If anyone has any suggestions, I would love to hear what's working for other people. It's maddening to be eating such tiny portions, exercising

6 days a week, and the scale stays the same.

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Hey...like the young folks say--"I'm feeling you--deep".

People do that--they focus on your weight and make the deal what kind of person you are.When your weight has absolutely 0% of who you are.Now sometimes as we get smaller in our program now--we hear it from all kinds of folks. Sometimes from people who actually don't know you at all.

Like I said in my last communication--I see the strange looks, I feel the eyes on me. I am not that important. But I was looking as I was pregnant with twins. But I am a Man who is now 50. So I am loving the fact that--I can walk and talk to certain people. They actually treat me different. I am shocked as I said--that some of the nicer Women--nicer looking want to talk to me...I was so shocked at how motivation and libido has been up. Almost like i am 32 again...Ranting is ok. We got to get it out somehow. Either here or to another person. I think you are doing the right thing--putting it on here

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I’ve been thinking a lot about self image/body image lately because I think those issues have always contributed to my regaining weight in the past. I would like to get to a point where I can be satisfied with the results of my weight loss rather than continuing to see a flawed body in the mirror no matter how much weight I lose. No matter how nice people said I looked, I always knew how imperfect I really was. I’ve mostly thought of my body as my enemy – the source of much misery, shame, and embarrassment throughout my life. I have decided to take a different approach this time. This body has been subjected to a lot of abuse and neglect by me. I’ve overfed and under exercised it for years. I’ve criticized it, cried about it, and tried to hide it. Still, it has continued to do its job of getting me around and allowing me to do satisfying work. I’ve been able to have two wonderful children and a successful marriage, take care of my home, travel, and generally enjoy a rich and rewarding life. It is a miraculous machine that is incredibly resilient in spite of what I’ve done to it. Instead of continuing to focus on everything that’s wrong with it, I’m going to try to accept and appreciate it for a change. I still want to lose the excess weight to look and feel better, but this time I’m going to really try to appreciate it more and be less critical of its outward appearance. I'll probably need some reminding, so when you catch me complaining or feeling sorry for myself I would appreciate a kick in the pants. Hopefully much smaller pants.

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This body has been subjected to a lot of abuse and neglect by me. I’ve overfed and under exercised it for years. I’ve criticized it, cried about it, and tried to hide it. Still, it has continued to do its job of getting me around and allowing me to do satisfying work. I’ve been able to have two wonderful children and a successful marriage, take care of my home, travel, and generally enjoy a rich and rewarding life. It is a miraculous machine that is incredibly resilient in spite of what I’ve done to it. Instead of continuing to focus on everything that’s wrong with it, I’m going to try to accept and appreciate it for a change.

That is beautiful, Becky. Sometimes I feel so ashamed for being ungrateful. This body of mine has afforded me a miraculous life! Let's try to remind each other to focus on the awe and wonder rather than the negative!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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