Am I being too sensitive about this or would this bother anyone else?

Only my immediate coworkers know about my surgery. I wasn't planning on making a big announcement. But this afternoon when a group if us where going to the cafeteria to eat lunch somebody asked me what I was doing to loose weight. My answer has always been "smaller portions and hard work". It's not a lie... it's just as much of the truth I planned to tell most people. Not two seconds after I gave that answer to this person I barely know one of my coworkers who knows about my surgery blurted "she had surgery" as the answer. I'm so mad! I feel like her saying this makes it sounds like such a simple process and surgery was 'the easy way out'. Am I just too sensitive about it? Should I say something?

I'm sorry but I'd be pissed!!!!!! It doesn't matter WHO you told, they should have never done that to you. I'm with you 100%

I don't blame you for being angry. It is your story to tell not your coworkers. In the beginning stages, I only told my immediate family. I have since told a few friends. I am sorry that happened to you.

Sorry...not sorry, lol. Only the truth was stated. You don't need to make an announcement regarding your surgery...but when *asked*...you should tell the truth. Anything less, is a lie....and deceptive.

@@jas84047 said : My answer has always been "smaller portions and hard work". It's not a lie... it's just as much of the truth I planned to tell most people.

Sorry...not sorry, lol. Only the truth was stated. You don't need to make an announcement regarding your surgery...but when *asked*...you should tell the truth. Anything less, is a lie....and deceptive.

Can you explain why you stated that the answer jas gives is a lie and deceptive?

I don't think it is deceptive by any means!!!! It's nobody's business what you had done. If anyone asks me personally I'm saying high protein and low carbs with exercise. It's not a lie.

It is unfortunate that people lack the ability to behave professionally in the work enviroment. You should be happy with the progress and feel sorry for someone who has no class as you are taking the high road. Don't dwell on it, pat yourself on the back, you are conquering a major obstacle in your life. FYI: It isn't a secret unless you are the only one who knows it!

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. I am not ashamed of it but it's still so new that it's still a lot even for me to grasp. The coworker who knew had to know because of our job. To be honest, she could technically be fired (& actually it's against the law) because we work in healthcare where I had my surgery (thus why she knew) so it's a HIPAA violation. I knew people would find out eventually but I feel it should be my place to tell. I think though the part that got me was how she answered it as "she had surgery" inferring the "easy way" - which we all know it is far from. I will say though, I did use it as a teaching moment for the gal who got told. She is also overweight so had lots of questions. I already talked with the 'teller' and asked she zip it.... but she is now mad at me for "being a baby". Ugh. I give up...

Thanks though to all who felt my pain!

You have every right to be angry. You did not directly share this information with her, she read your file. I also work in healthcare and this is in direct violation of HIPAA law. Every patient file contains personal identifying information and is not to be shared. I personally would take a different tact and report her actions.

Yeah not her business to spread. But in telling her, you kind of opened that up to discussion. I think you're being a little too sensitive. After you lose all your weight and people get used to the new you, this won't even be a thing. So I'd say just grin and bear and keep working. This too shall pass.

You said you worked in a hospital/healthcare setting. So, did you just tell her about the surgery in passing, or was she involved in your care and that's how she knew? If the first, then she is just rude. If the second, it is absolutely a HIPAA violation and it should be reported/documented. She wouldn't get away with blurting out other patient's medical information, and nobody would consider another patient a "baby" for reporting such a violation.

Either way, it sounds like you're handling it well. Best of luck to you!

Being 3 days post op VSG, I am pretty sure surgery isn't an east way out. I only told 2 of my co-workers, and they have kept it under wraps but I have a sinking feeling I will be outed as well. So I really wish I would not have mentioned it to anyone. I find this is the biggest regret others have as well. Hindsight ....being 20/20. Just move on...you can be angry...you can confront the person...but really at this point, what is done is done. Just have a good comeback when/if it is mentioned again.

de·cep·tive

dəˈseptiv/

adjective

giving an appearance or impression different from the true one; misleading.

"he put the question with deceptive casualness"

synonyms: misleading, illusory, illusionary, specious; ambiguous; distorted; literaryillusive

"distances are very deceptive"

deceitful, duplicitous, fraudulent, counterfeit, underhanded, cunning, crafty, sly, guileful, scheming, treacherous, Machiavellian;

disingenuous, untrustworthy, unscrupulous, unprincipled, dishonest, insincere, false;

informalcrooked, sharp, shady, sneaky, tricky, foxy

"deceptive practices"

Not trying to beat a dead horse here...and if you don't agree...so be it...that is your prerogative. But telling ppl you are eating "smaller portions" and "high Protein, low carbs" is...MISLEADING, CUNNING, CRAFTY, SLY, SHADY. Albeit true...you are eating smaller portions...but only because you had a surgery. Therefore is the reason I used the adjective, "deceptive."

She only blurted out the truth. Telling the truth...is never wrong. Be open with your experience...you never know who you might help...along the way.

My .02 cents.

WLS surgery is a medical procedure. IMHO it was not your coworkers responsibility to add her comments. Obviously, she wanted to call you out. You don't owe anyone a full disclosure on how you lost the weight. If you're sensitive about this than so am I, as I cringed when I read your post.

On the positive, your weight loss is showing enough for people to notice!

Edited August 6, 201511 yr by CityGirlinBurbs

@@jas84047 Just smack her in the face! She'll think twice next time before running that big yapper! I'm almost positive HR won't mind. You just get a employee handbook and cut out the pansy part about " work place violence" and pled ignorance!! And if they can't take your side and be understanding to your new found hardship about being around that person then tell them to take that job and shove it, you don't need that stress in your life anyway! Tell'me Elode said so!

No I'm kidding don't do that....Make some ex lax brownies just for her...or I heard Amazon sugar-free gummy bears are good So don't even have to touch her, if you think she's skinny now just wait until she gets hit with the Bowles of hell!! Sorry that's the only nice suggestion I have

It's a good thing I didn't tell anyone about my surgery "in confidence." Because if I had and they'd blurted it out in public, violating my confidence because "telling the truth is never wrong," I'd have cut them a new asshole.

@@Sanstan ... your world may be a black or white one, but I can imagine hundreds of scenarios in which blurting out "the truth" is wrong, stupid, hurtful, destructive, revengeful, dangerous or illegal.