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I feel like I look weird



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Had my sleeve gastrectomy on 12/16/14, and have lost 120 pounds in 7 months.

I am jogging, following the diet like crazy, and have gone from being a daily (heavy) drinker to only having two drinks (on my birthday in May) since the surgery.

My doctor is thrilled. All tests read great. I've lost more in 7 months than the doctor predicted I would ever lose (he said -110 was what he thought would be likely for a final loss, but more would be great), and I am still losing.

And while I physically feel pretty good, doing things I couldn't or wouldn't have dreamed of a year ago, I can't help but be uncomfortable in my (saggy) skin. I feel like I have that "used to be a fat guy" too-small head now. I have the droopy stomach skin, etc. I look in the mirror, and I don't really like what I see.

How have you dealt with WLS success by all measures that doesn't register when you see yourself in a mirror?

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I know what you mean. Can't speak for you, but for me, this hard look in the mirror is not too attractive, and similar to you, get lots of muscle building exercise, but now going on 80# down in three months, looking pretty droopy. This sounds really strange, but I expected to see the in-shape, smooth skin (no droopys and no stretch marks) 25 year old farm boy emerge even though I am 64 and made decisions that meant that I was significantly overweight from 35 on. The reality is that I got up to 450 at one point, and put my health at high risk, and as a result, my skin got very misshapen and stretched out. Now, like you, moving around great, have much better endurance, have gotten cured of five major health issues due to surgery, but am STILL looking for that good looking farm kid. I am having to adjust to a very different "Me" ..... and to reframe my experience into being so glad that I am better, and this is me with droops and sags, and that is ok...

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Guys have plastic surgery, too.

:)

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I'm down 120lbs, too. Biggest areas of saggy skin are my stomach, arm pits and inner thighs. What bothers me more than the saggy skin is the fact that my arm puts and waist are always itchy! No redness or rash, just constant itchiness.

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I have issues with body image. I don't always see the weight loss because of the sagging skin (stomach, arm pits and inner thighs also). I still see the fat guy. The scale (110 #), my clothes (down from 5X shirt to a 2X) and my friends and family see the changing new me. I have a hard time with it. I don't think it's unusual it's just guys in general don't talk about it. For me personally, my surgeons office mentioned the plastic surgery option down the road but after going over the pros & cons I decided as long as my body's insides were healthy the outside I'll learn eventually to accept.

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we had our surgery the same day sir, and trust me, we are all in the same boat. everyone raves about how good i look etc, and most days i think i either look sickly or i dont recognize who I am, or i think i look fat. People used to use that a skinny guy on the inside waiting to get out line, but im not sure if i wasn't a fat guy on the inside too. lol

I dont think the end results will ever be aesthetically where we hope they will be, even with plastics. For me, age just prohibits it. I think it is going to come down to accepting that while i wont be fat, I also wont look amazing in and of itself, unless you compare the before and afters. SO someone who doesn't know I was fat, wont think i look amazing. I truly understand , as do we all here it seems.

The silver lining is at least ill be here to have these problems. Without this surgery and weight loss, I dont think id be here for that much longer.

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I used to use the excuse that I wasn't fat, I was just big boned. Now I know my bones ate the same as everyone else's. Lol. I probably won't look like a super model, but I am healthier than I have been in the last 30 years! That's all that matters to me! (And being skinny is cool, too. Lol)

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Lots of advice and good discussion on this thread.

The health aspect certainly matters to me and is number one, but I would be lying to say my self-esteem wouldn't play a huge part in any decision related to further surgeries. Better believe if I have rashes or skin infections or something of the like, I will do something.

Most of the surgeries are pretty involved (from what I've read), so I would recommend doing your research (if you're interested) and also consulting with a reputable surgeon.

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Oh my god...men with body image issues <<insert evil laugh>>. Seriously, I have always had body image issues. What kept me from overreacting or feeling depressed about not liking what I see is that I had two female relatives with real eating disorders and body dysmorphia. It is a very serious issue that sadly leads to sufferers starving themselves to death. I say had because they have both died from cardiac complications from their eating disorder. So when ever I have the misfortune of looking in the mirror and not liking what I see, I remind myself to get over it and live my life as best I can. P.S. Though women seem to suffer more from eating disorders, men and women both suffer about equally from BDD Body Dysmorphic Disorder.

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Glad I found this thread as this is what I'm going thorough now.

I'm a little less than a year out and down about 110 lbs and feeling good. I look great clothed, but saggy and strangely proportioned naked.

I have this saggy spare tire. It's a deflated tire. Just the deflated inner tube, I guess. Also a saggy wrinkly ass. My legs are a little saggy too. I have some excess skin on my chest hiding what I think are decent pecs.

I have been working out (HIIT) and doing more outdoors. I know my muscle structure is improved.

I guess I hoped I'd see more firmness... more taut. Has anyone seen improvements over a longer time in this area? I'm wondering if I need to be more patient for the results or if I need to adjust my expectations.

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Hot Yoga gave me the best muscle tone under loose skin. I can wear compression tshirts to minimize chafing while working out but thigh skin is a pain. Next year I'll look into plastics.

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Good to know. Maybe I'll give hot yoga a shot.

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Wow, this thread is a god send. I'm in the same boat - I only recently (YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) internalized the changes that have taken place physically since my July surgery. I looked at a picture at the beach taken two years ago and one taken last week and I did not recognize the guy in the second picture. My wife must have thought I was going nuts because I just kept staring at the two pics side by side on my tablet. I've lost over 100 lbs but I never really saw it until yesterday. I still saw myself as the same guy I was before my surgery. Conversely, when I was so much bigger, I didn't see myself as that big, either. It was only when I saw the pictures from my son's wedding in late 2014 that I realized how large I had gotten. I am hoping that I will now begin to really see the changes that have taken place!

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Wow, this thread is a god send. I'm in the same boat - I only recently (YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) internalized the changes that have taken place physically since my July surgery. I looked at a picture at the beach taken two years ago and one taken last week and I did not recognize the guy in the second picture. My wife must have thought I was going nuts because I just kept staring at the two pics side by side on my tablet. I've lost over 100 lbs but I never really saw it until yesterday. I still saw myself as the same guy I was before my surgery. Conversely, when I was so much bigger, I didn't see myself as that big, either. It was only when I saw the pictures from my son's wedding in late 2014 that I realized how large I had gotten. I am hoping that I will now begin to really see the changes that have taken place!

Well said.

I've had very similar experiences as what you described.

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Wow, this thread is a god send. I'm in the same boat - I only recently (YESTERDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) internalized the changes that have taken place physically since my July surgery. I looked at a picture at the beach taken two years ago and one taken last week and I did not recognize the guy in the second picture. My wife must have thought I was going nuts because I just kept staring at the two pics side by side on my tablet. I've lost over 100 lbs but I never really saw it until yesterday. I still saw myself as the same guy I was before my surgery. Conversely, when I was so much bigger, I didn't see myself as that big, either. It was only when I saw the pictures from my son's wedding in late 2014 that I realized how large I had gotten. I am hoping that I will now begin to really see the changes that have taken place!

Took me months to realize I didn't need to turn like I always did to slip into small spaces. I didn't know I did it until I realized I don't have to anymore.

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      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
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