so here's my story ---- I'm not one that loses weight easily (never have been although know I'm hypothyroid). I'm considering surgery because I feel like I'm doing all the right things (working out 3-4x per week 20min weight+20-30 cardio and eating healthy) and the scale just keeps climbing!!!! I am at 36.9BMI at age 30.... and we havent even had kids yet. How high will it climb if I get pregnant and then STILL cant lose weight... and have EVEN more to loose!!! Would I be willing or able to spend the money and time on myself to have the surgery after a baby.... these are things that concern me (admittedly surgery freaks me out already).

I've struggled with my weight since high school. (although lookin back, cant believe I thought I was fat then!) lost some weight (unhealthily) sophomore year in college. post college the lbs packed on (despite working out regularly at a gym and playing volleyball weekly in a league).

First saw PCP dr at age 23 because I noticed weight creeping up even with working out. tried Synthroid, Metformin (pre-diabetes), anti-anxiety drugs. 2 years later had gained almost 50 lbs. Depression really set it (although I've never stopped working out 3x a week) and is getting worse due to self-image (I love myself and know I have valuable qualities but looking in the mirror and feeling MISERABLE in my body plus not being able to move (bend, etc.) the way I want to makes me literally CRY). got married at 29 and a year later couldnt believe how much heavier I was just a year out.

PCP doc agrees about losing weight so sent me to endocrinologist in Sept 2014 ---- who was AWFUL! did ZERO tests, had no answers (or inclination to answer me) on WHY I'm gaining weight when eating healthy and working out. Just sent me out the door to meet with nutritionist (who prescribed the AWFUL new govt "food plate" <--wayyyy too many refined carbs!) AND a Rx for weightloss (Qysmia).

After researching, it is an ANTI-seizure drug (not epilietic!) along with more poison for my body. STILL I tried it for over a month (was supposed to lose 10lbs).... and GAINED 1 lb! plus it was $200 EACH month. and I really didnt like putting that in my body (major birth defects if accidentally get pregnant)

First debated surgery Oct 2014 but mom cried and begged me to try again. Spent $$$$ getting hormones tested and doing sugar/gluten/dairy free diet for 2 months. Natural thyroid has definitely helped with energy levels and I'm off anxiety meds (except for panic attack "as needed" meds) but STILL have gained 10lbs in 3 months, so I'm decided that surgery is the only route that is going to help give me the boost since I havent been able to lose ANY weight in almost 7 years.

Now 30 and would like to have a kid in next year or two (32-33 before) BUT I dont want to be a 300lb+ mom who cant keep up with her kids (hubby is thin). Also have 2 maternal aunts who are MO and type2 diabetics and mom is mildly overweight. I dont want to end up like my aunts! They're both on so many weight-related medications and are just unhealthy! (which I've tried to avoid by cooking at home and not eating out).

Live in rural area so there ARE no fast-food joints to eat at. We eat out maybe 2x a MONTH at maximum (usually after church) so eating at home 99% of the time. eat a lot of chicken and fish and venison (deer) as well as veggies (very little red meat) grill and saute and bake almost all of our food (never fry).

I feel so frustrated (and like a complete failure) that I cant lose weight with diet and exercise on my own. All of my coworkers and family always comment about how healthy I eat and often I work out but NOTHING WORKS (and of course, no one ever comments how good I look because I keep GAINING WEIGHT!). I look in the mirror and dont recognize myself... because I know what I'm putting in and that just doesnt compute! Genetics and portion control are my best guess (and yes I keep a food diary - myFitnessPal all) on why I'm so overweight.

Blood and hormone testing in OCT 2014 show I'm pre-diabetic and definitely hypothyroid (symptoms confirmed, TSH still within "normal range") so I think both of those things will hopefully be resolved or at least improved with weight loss. (hopefully???) ALSO worrying is that majority of excess weight is in my midsection (which I keep reading puts me at risk for heart attack, stroke and other serious crap)

nervous about surgery but DEFINITELY more scared of what weight I will be at if I dont do this. Self-pay patient (insurance requires 5 yrs employment AND 5 yrs M.Obese BMI of 40). since we're putting off baby at min 1 year (yes till weight stabilizes after surgery), I would like to have this done in the next 1-2 months (Feb 2015).

I'm looking at Davis Clinic in Houston, or possible NewStart at Memorial Hermann-Woodlands. --- any advice about those clinics, or any docs in Woodlands/N.Houston area??!?

advice/suggestions, esp from those with similar starting height/BMI (and those doing/done G.sleeve BEFORE having kids) is VERY welcomed.

@@RedSalamander I really appreciate your answer and perspective! It's definitely one that has caused me doubt on having the surgery now.

I'm going to come at this from a different angle. I am only 6 days post-op at this point, so obviously some things will change, but I wouldn't go back and have the surgery before kids. Nope. I had two healthy, normal pregnancies (despite my weight, which isn't really an issue) and now I have 2 lovely kids. And now I have no plans to have any more, so I don't have to worry about a fetus being properly nourished...just me! And I don't have to worry that if I have extreme (but rare!) complications that it will set pregnancy back even further...

I think you'll also find that pregnancy and motherhood puts a wrench in your body hatred. You might feel uncomfortable, but you will find that your body is a miraculous, awe-inspiring thing. And frankly, you won't have time or energy for self-loathing. So don't worry too much about that.

Just some thoughts.

On the other hand, if you are hoping the surgery will enable you to become pregnant, that's a whole 'nother ball of wax!

Oh, and you talk about your age...I know that you're in Texas, and I am most certainly not, but I had my kids at 31 and 35, and am on the young side of the other young mothers I know. Many of my friends didn't have their children until their late 30s and early 40s!

Where my current thought process is.... I'm 30 (almost 31). Even if I had the surgery after my first kid (we want 2-3), that would be 3 more years (almost 35) at my current or HIGHER weight (I cant lose weight to save my life.... I'm already doing Jay Robb Protein shakes and eating "clean"/mostly Paleo). because you figure you cant do the surgery and still breastfeed (so that's 10 months of pregnancy plus 1-2 years ...hopefully!... of breastfeeding).

Plus a lot of the research I've read recently reports obese moms at higher risks of clots and C-sections.... not to mention my energy level, mobility or self-esteem.

I know its not an "easy" decision either way. however, if I do the surgery beforehand, (likely) I wouldnt even end up at my CURRENT weight... even at my highest pregnant weight. and I'd have a much better tool for re-losing it after.

and yeah.... I'm not the oldest mom but I am definitely getting a late start (or so it feels like compared to about 75% of my friends... most are having their 2nd or last baby this coming year. I think most started around 26-28). Again--- I dont really mind being older... I waited this long to pursue my career and find the right guy to marry. . I just dont want to wait SO long that my age is considered "high risk" to pregnancy and includes scary things like amnio tests...

honestly... we're not really sure if it will be "necessary" to lose weight before I can get pregnant. we arent trying yet. Having said that, in this CRAZY weight loss journey, I have had doctors tell me that I had PCOS (although my periods are pretty regular 29-30 days) because of NOT being able to lose weight (even on medically supervised diet) and other symptoms. I've also been diagnosed as pre-diabetic (confirmed with blood tests) and also hypothyroid. So having said that.... those conditions do tend to have higher % of problems getting prego. There's just no way to find out until we're ready....

I really am torn on this decision. luckily, my husband is supportive no matter what.

Edited January 20, 201511 yr by txfirefly979