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Went to the post-operative support meeting at my hospital....AND...



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Can I just say I LOVE BariatricPal??!!

I wasn't turned off completely but I think the majority of my support will be from this place, my good friends that have had surgeries and a local support group I'm starting with another BP member. That's just me.

Not so great things that happened:

-One person (who had not done a great deal of research but had a 12/16 surgery date) dominated the meeting with his wife. I felt like we were being held hostage.

-The facilitator was a substitute for the regular person and lacked facilitation skills.

-A woman who was there supporting her husband who was a couple years out said something rude to me about after I have surgery I'll be cute, too, like the thinner woman next to me who happened to be post-op. Luckily I was thinking quick on my feet and said "I am cute now but thankfully I'm not here to be cute, just healthy." Shut her up pretty quick!! :)

-I was struck how normal people seemed to act and feel at differing stage and everyone talked about the lethargy, I was expecting boundless energy about week 4 of post-op LOL

-People were trying to convince me that I needed to take 6 weeks off work, when I simply asked how much they had taken and if they felt like it was appropriate for the work they did. I really hate unsolicited advice.

Great things that happened:

-I actually went

-I saw/met a guy who was 3 years on maintaining 235 lb weight loss. Whoa!

-Learned and confirmed a lot of things I've read here and other places

-Only one person there had had a complication with their surgery with my same surgeon and it was an ulcer that was being resolved.

-Got great tips for surviving holidays

All in all I would say it was well worth the hour and a half of my time. It was another snapshot of the process. Allowed me soak in more of the "it's gonna be ok" vibe even though certain people were annoying to me. If available to you, I would highly recommend attending a post-op support session from a place you're planning to have surgery.

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I have yet to attend a support group meeting but have been thinking about going. I'm not sure if I'll get more benefit now or after I hit my goal weight. I 'm with you, I get a lot of good info right here. The posts are really helpful, everyone has an answer for everything. Getting some good info for the holidays is not a bad idea, maybe I'll look into the next meeting.

Thanks for the post!

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I agree the support groups have been interesting but worth it for me.

I think of it like a AA meeting for bariatic patients. You get the good with the bad anywhere you go. I just take what is good information. I try to be supportive to all the members. I'm in awe of the members that still go to meetings at a year or more out.

Cooking classes I can't say enough about. Its like a live food network show..Even better we all get to sample the recipes and chat after the class.

I'm just starting a behavior modification class. good information. We will also get into relationships and stress management. Love my hospital after care programs.

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Oh also having a state wide WLS Christmas pot luck at the hospital. Can't wait!

Edited by jenn1

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I have not been to a meeting I just have used this as a way to get incouragement and read others stories and chimed in in when it relates to myslef.

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Right now I'm accepting support from anyplace I can get it. I have been attending support group session and have one coming up this Monday. Our surgeon also offers a post op advanced skills class that continues the education after surgery about eating right and emotional eating, etc. I'm going to those every two weeks. And of course, I also count on the experts on this site to fill in the gaps. I've even read the Emotional Eating First Aid (I think that's what it's called) to get some extra information.

I sort of feel like I'm in AA and need the constant support to keep my mind in the right place. And it has been working. I am doing what I need to do and there's less of me to lug to these meetings each time I go. :)

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@@*Lexie*

That's great. There is the once a month session that is not very well attended. The lady that made the rude comment is the wife of this patient but she has 30 years of nursing experience. She has good information obviously poorly presented and I get the sense that she's part of the reason the meetings are not well attended at least for that location. Anyhow, I'm all for 12 step recovery and I may show up at a real OA meetings in the future.

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@@MisforMimi That's so unfortunate. I'm lucky to not have to deal with that. I know here other hospitals have support groups from their bariatric program and I could technically go to any. It would stink to have to go to another hospital but maybe that's where everyone else went that left your hospital meeting.

Also might not hurt to give some private feedback to the doctor's office about how you feel about the support group not feeling very supportive.

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I wish I could find a meeting that didn't conflict with my work schedule. There are 3 meetings that I know of and they are all during the day...nothing after 5pm that I could actually attend.

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Personally, I was thrilled to find a WLS support group closer to me. I had been going 75 miles one way occasionally before. One of my My New Year's Eve goals was to get to a support group. (1 goal done!)

That said, there are many opinions, dominating people, and new ideas each meeting. Not many banders. 2 out of 40 or so... It is nice to see a range of ages ,weights ,pre and post op people.

In a couple of weeks, I will pass the 8 year mark. I am the longest veteran, and I learn something every time.

Just like here, the honeymooners (1 or so month- year out) are gushing about their new life..exciting for them!

Most of us are in our stride... Working on long term maintenance

we share clothing , stories, some recipes. But I feel it is important to stay connected.

This site helps me daily and I am thankful !!! Keep trying. No matter where you are and what you choose!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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