Does anyone else feel like an amputee?

louise162 · May 14, 2007

After a having a really bad week with band complications I've really come to understand that the lapband is by no means an easy way out when it comes to losing weight.

I sometimes feel like I've had part of me amputated. Don't get me wrong I don't regret having the operation done for a second but it really is a massive change. I didn't realise quite how much I was emotionally dependant on food and I feel like I've lost a part of me. Take this evening, I'd just had my barium swallow and was feeling really crappy. My usual instinct would have been to get a large takeaway (probably an Indian) and veg out on the couch for the evening. Instead I had to be content with a very small chicken breast a tablespoon of potato, a tablespoon of carrot and a small floret of broccoli!! It's really weird and I'm not getting used to it as quickly as I'd like. I'm constantly having these battles with my body and my body is winning every time for a change. I never overeat as I want this surgery to work but I'm so damn irritable I feel like screaming! Does this make any sense to anyone or is this just an emotional splat on the screen!!lol!!

OH Juli · May 14, 2007

Louise

I can't say that I feel like an amputee but there are times when having the band is a pain in the butt and I wish I could just be "normal".

Well, truth of the matter is that I've never been "normal" about food. This is just a different kind of weird, but it's a gonna get me healthy kind of weird.

So I guess instead of mourning those old relationships with food that weren't healthy, like mourning bad lovers, instead of being sad we should be saying "good riddence!"

OH Juli

The journey sometimes in painful but sometimes it's wonderful as well.

shutuplena · May 14, 2007

Louise, I feel your pain! I feel lost a lot of the time, like I'm really missing something. It's an addiction like any other addiction. When you give it up it's like giving up a part of yourself. I get anxious sometimes like I don't know what to do with myself. I didn't realize how difficult it would be either. It is so hard to adjust for me so I understand. But we are happy we did this and we're not giving up, it just takes time to adjust to the change. Some people adjust quickly and some don't. But hang in there, you have to believe it gets easier. And the fact that you lost 35lbs is awesome. Keep your chin up!

punkytres · May 14, 2007

yah Iv'e had the same problem, it's also been really hard for me because I have my husband and daughter here eating everything that I cant right now. But I keep doin alot of self talk. You will do great just give it some time, change is by far easy. good luck

lynners · May 15, 2007

I was doing really well with the "losing my best friend.....food" until my mother was diagnosed with stomach cancer has only been given a few months to live. I have always dealt with these types of problems by eating. I have tried to fill the gap with many different things. I t works as long as I'm doing something, but the minute I stop, I can hear the chocolate or Cookies or something else calling my name. I will grab a sf pudding or something and sometimes it works. Other times I am ripping cupboards apart looking for anything I might have missed when I cleaned out the junk from my house. The great thing is even when I do eat the things I shouldn't I don't eat nearly as much. I used to make a pan of brownies and eat 3/4 of it as soon as they were warm enough. Now I can only eat one or two. I actually threw some away last week because they were stale. That has never happened before.

I guess I'm trying to say I understand your pain. Try to keep yourself busy. If you do 'fall off the wagon', get back on and try to do better tomorrow. Hang in there and keep trying, you can do this.

louise162 · May 15, 2007

Thanks everyone for your replies; it's good to know I'm not going through this alone. I think I just need to take it one day at a time; with a bit of luck my brain will get used to it!

gretchens4 · May 16, 2007

Oh yes, I am feeling that way. I even said to my husband last night, "I've had a horrible day and I CAN'T eat". I am pretty tight right now with my 2nd fill, and I just can't overeat (and I have tried a few times and had to throw up). A friend asked me to go out to eat, and I just feel bummed out right now b/c I know I can go and socialize, but I'll want to eat and I can't. It is a huge emotional adjustment for me right now. Thanks for posting.

Gretchen

banded 2/23/07

-28 pounds

Nile · May 16, 2007

I have that problems too, but i know that it's way better to face the problems than hidding them under a big pile of food. In the past when i had a problem i used to eat lots of food and forget about the whole problem, now i try to deal with the problem so at the end of the day it won't bother anymore.