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RNY 7/31- Feeling extremely regretful



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I am feeling so down regreting having the surgery. I developed portal vein thrombosis and now have to be on blood thinners for 6 months. I regret not accepting the way my body is and altering my digestive system. If u are considering getting the surgery make sure you go in 100%. I was doubtful even right before they put me to sleep. I wish i could go back in time and not have gone through this. Feeling extremey depressed and overwhelmed. I almost didnt make it. As a previously healthy 27 year old, i should have just not got through with it. Cant believe i made such a stupid choice.

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Hang in there. I had surgery 6/23 and became seriously depressed. It took awhile (6weeks) to start to feel like my old self. I agree with you about making 100% sure surgery is right for you. Keep your head up and I hope you get better.

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One thing I forgot to add I almost didnt make it out of the hospital alive. They over medicated me, found me non- responsive, didn't hook me back up to the monitors to monitor me and had to call a code to get me to come out off it.

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I am right there with you...

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I'm sorry you've been through so much. Trust that things will get better for you. Hang in there and try to find a support group. I had my surgery 12 years ago. I clearly remember my first day home and thinking. "What have I done to myself?" My sister was there to encourage me. She had gone through surgery 6 months prior. She said, "It will get better. I promise." It did. I would do it again. My only regret is that I didn't do it sooner. I was 51.

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I am scheduled for surgery in October. After reading your post I'm wondering what part of the surgery is making you regret your choice? Was it a complication? Are you unhappy about the new required lifestyle? Could you elaborate as I am in the decision making process now.

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Thanks everyone for your support. Still feeling depressed. I have a great support system at home, but, I cant get over what I did. I regret it because now i understand that our digestive system is perfectly designed. Regardless, we are still making dramatic lifestyle changes. Now, I think problems with food are in our mind. If we can control our mind we could implement the same lifestyle changes without having to alter our body. I have about a month without eating a full meal, or sweets or fats. Why not do the same without having to cut our stomachs? I also regret it because i am afraid of long term complications, example, ulcers, perforated pouch, intestinal issues, gallbladder. I dont ever want to be in the hospital again :(.

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Sorry you had complications but it doesn't mean that this surgery is bad. Don't get me wrong I did have regrets the first month or so and it's called buyers remorse but that's also cause it's a new lifestyle. Anything new takes time to adjust. So you have to have faith in your judgement. Unfortunately in your situation you had a complications and are on blood thinners but that's for betterment so that way you don't have any clots again. The percentage of people who have complications is very small and unfortunately you fall in that category.

WLS is a lifestyle change and it's for people like myself couldn't do it on my own. I rather save myself from heart, kidney, liver, etc issues by having RNY. And I feel great and glad I did this and would do it again if I had to. Am glad that my life has change drastically for the better. I am an advocate for WLS.

I pray that you get well and bounce back quickly which you will and continue learning about RNY cause you will learn something new everyday.

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Well I had my surgery last Monday August 11th. Tonight I had my first experience with dumping. Was rather unpleasant. Since the surgery I am moody. Not used to that. I hope I feel like myself soon. :unsure:

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WLS is mega serious. Like you say it changes the digestive system. It shouldn't be seen as the be all and end all.

For most people it is phychological and professional help is required whether you want it or not. There are a lot of resources out there, so jsut a matter of finding them and asking for help.

I had the sleeve and woke up thinking what the hell have I done. I revised to rny because of reflux and preventing any chance of throat cancer which my grandpa died of. If my reflux wasn't so bad and wasn't causing me problems I would have stayed with sleeve. Also had another hiatus hernia that needed reparing.

When I woke up from RNY saying what the hell have I done.

When making such drastic decisions, we all need to use a logical approach. Write down pros and cons. Do the possible benefits outweight the possible complications. Are you prepared for the worse, whatever, that is for you. I made sure I had my will updated. I also thought about what would happen if I had too stay in hospital for months on end. For those who have families what and how would WLS affect it. Also work wise how will it affect you - eating small meals and people asking qs or giving you a hard time?

Try not too worry too much. Keep positive.

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A strong positive family support system has helped me my wife has been great as well as friends and neighbors.

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2 months before my surgery August 5th i was researching the future on what to eat and recipes i still search daily for new ideas for that time when it arrives i can eat some what normal. i think that even helped me since every thing i do every day is for the future and down the road, it did take me 2 weeks to wrap my head around what i was about to do but the end decision was easy something has to happen.

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So sorry you are regretting your surgery. There is help out there so please don't delay. I researched for almost three years before I made the decision to have the bypass and three weeks out I absolutely have no regrets. I had many health issues that are going to get better or go away completely which was my main motivation. I have been blessed and had a incident free surgery and a quick recovery. Prayers for you.

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I'm sure all of us have tried doing it without surgery with no success. That's why we end up having the surgery. I don't regret it for a minute. But I didn't have any complications either. Hope you are doing well and will come through the other side with great health. Take care.

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So sorry you had complications. I also had a complication and it took me about 3 weeks to stop thinking "why the hell did i do this". Now I'm 4 weeks out and feeling so good! I hope you find a post-op support group and/or a counselor to work with. Hopefully that will help you.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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