Tomorrow I start my preop diet and I'm trying to figure out how am I going to stop eating at lunch time without any questions. Where I work we eat lunch together everyday and I'm no longer going to be part of that. I'm not planning on telling anyone because they often give me a hard time about diets and aren't the most supportive team. Should I share with my boss and listen to her judgments or just keep it under wraps? I'm confused and don't want to be the topic of water cooler discussions.

I felt the same actually. Now I am telling those that I feel safe to share with. Tonight it was my teen stepsons as it's my first day on the shakes. They were awesome about it. I've told a couple co-workers with mixed reactions. One wanted to know everything about it. I work in a church and one of my pastor bosses was disappointed and thought I could lose weight if I walked more and she joined me, that I would be encouraged to do it on my own, and did I pray about it. So I can see why so many want to keep it to themselves.

I guess all we can do it what feels right at the time and be confident in our decision when someone voices a different opinion.

Take a pic tomorrow am and journal your thoughts. It will be an amazing gift to reread a year from now.

Yay us!

I did a double take when I read the topic title. o_O

Joking aside, I didn't tell anyone at first except for five people. But now, 80 pounds down, I did tell a few folks at work. I didn't want scrutiny or advice or judgment. I was afraid I'd get all that if I said anything early on. But now that I've had a good weight loss, some of that fear left.

I am a private person and only told a handful of people. There are a couple I wish I hadn't told -- not that they aren't supportive but because I worry about my secret being kept. Not sure why I'm like this but there it is. Must the years of embarrassment about weight issues, feeling like I was being judged for being heavy. Now I'm getting queries about the weight loss and I just say that I've been working really hard and I'm obsessed with exercise now, which is true.

You can always tell people later but you can't un-tell! I would just say I'm on a liquid diet supervised by my doctor or something like that. Good luck to you!

that is a tough question and honestly it's only you that can really know the answer. you know your coworkers best. For me i'm pretty much a don't care what people think kind of person. one of the reasons i got to be a big as i was in the first place you could say....

i chose to share with the females in my group.. not really sure why at this point i haven't shared with the guys but for the most part after the first few weeks most have forgotten or just don't bring it up.. i figure they have more important things to worry about vs what i put in my mouth.

I did share with my boss though - firstly because i trust and admire her.. and secondly not because she needed to know why i would be out on medical leave but so that she would understand going forward all the different appointments i would have to keep.. and if your like me there will be a lot of visits to get that Fill just right.

I suggest starting small. pick one or two and see how that goes. no one needs to know everything in your life.

I have told my closest work colleague and my two bosses and a couple of others know from Facebook. When I told two of them face to face I could see from their faces that it was a shock and that they checked themselves before they came out with supportive comments. I think they were holding back the.. can't you do it any other way comments. When some people say this I think it is an expression of concern more than it is a negative statement but it's so sensitive. What I did make sure of is that my one boss (who is a young man) understands about the restrictions and that this is not easy at all. He was like.. oh wow.. give up popcorn? I couldn't do that. Overall they have wished me well and they are rooting for me.. I am very lucky. I think if you feel uneasy follow your gut and don't say anything unless you feel comfortable.

I think its all about how you feel letting people know. I'm almost 11 weeks out from surgery and after some of the negative reactions I got just from family I decided to keep it to myself and tell people on an as needed to know basis. Now reactions are wow. You can always pass the shakes off as another attempt at a diet and explain later if you want. Good luck to you!

I'd let your boss know that you have surgery scheduled on x day and will need x amount of time off for recovery (for me it was 2 weeks) and leave it at that. Not eating with the others is easily disguised by going for walks during lunch.

Good luck, Sweetie.

I was nervous at first on who I should tell. Then when the weight started coming off I felt like I needed to tell anyone who asked the truth. I dont hide that I have lap band because it has saved my life and if by telling the truth I can help someone else out I want to do that. I have gotten some negative feedback but for the most part everyone is supportive. I even have complete strangers who have heard my story through others ask me questions and want to look into having.

I was unsure who I was going to tell all together at first. Then I decided to pretty much tell my co-workers, boss and friends. It is not known on facebook or anything. I did have a friend that up until the day of surgery was asking me if I was sure I wanted to do this. Besides that everyone has been supportive. I don't know if this helps you or not. Good luck.

Hi Crystal

I understand your concern, I feel the same but I made the decision to tell my coworkers and I do not regreted yet , all my coworkers are very suported with me and always are telling me how great I look and some of them wants to do the surgery, it made me laught some times they already know what i will order for lunch and just ask me for the money, somedays they tell me that clothes is to big for you and that I need to buy new sizes it is very important to have that support that give you the energy to keep going , my surgery was on november 5 ,2013 and I haved lost 60 pounds so far without doing any exercise due to a fall on february and a meniscus surgery two weeks ago but still following my doctors instructions regarding food and Water intake, good luck to you it is not easy but it can be done,

At first i told a few at work because we would go to lunches too. My boss had her opinion about me having the surgery but that's all it is, an opinion. I came out to my friends and fam on fb on my 2 month post op and i don't regret it nor am i ashamed of having my surgery. People have been private messaging me about my band and trying to get info because they themselves are considering the band. There are those few negative people but its your life your body not theirs.

Thanks for the advice. I guess I'm not comfortable with people knowing because everyone have to have a opinion. Like other times I've tried dieting, it ends up with those people waiting for you to fail.

Well now that I have my approval waiting on date, I am torn with what to tell my boss, I really don't want anyone to know at work, one reason is the people I work with most would be waiting for me to fail. My boss is not a how do I put it, one to keep things confidential, but I know I have to give a reason for needing to be off work. I thought about just stating I just want to take my vacation at that time and leave it at that, but I am not sure how long I will need off as I do have a very physical labor job and I would have to meet a criteria to be able to return. Not sure what to do, any input, advice would be greatly appreciated.

I know exactly what you mean. I finally told my boss because I couldn't hide the fact that I wasn't eating lunch with her anymore. Now she's pressuring me to tell our other lunch buddy because she keeps asking her why I'm not eating. I'm not wanting to do that because she's a judgey mc judgerson! They would only want to telling me how I'll fail because diets don't work, just like before. I'm having a hard time with this.