Writing an essay on "the limitations morbid obesity impose on you in your daily life" for the insurance agency

[Menelly 56]

And I kind of want to cry. Anyone care to proofread and critique before i send it in tomorrow? Would really appreciate it.

Describe the limitations morbid obesity imposes on you in your daily activity:

So, today I was dancing with my daughter. Turned on the music, singing, dancing, laughing. I lasted about 4 min before my hip and knee gave out, and I was horribly out of breath. My adorable two year old is going "mama, dance!" and I can't anymore. I'm in too much pain.

I go to get dressed and none of my clothes fit anymore. I'm stuffing myself into things two sizes too small because I don't want to admit my real size.

My sister completed suicide last December. I promised her I'd take up running, like she'd always done. I told her I'd run the NAMI Walks 5k in her honor. But how can I? I can't even dance for 4 min. I can't run for 30! Even trying Couch to 5k hurts too badly.

I have a flap of skin where I've had two c-sections, and I have a nasty rash there regularly from sweat and skin and yuck. It itches and burns and frankly smells horrible.

I hate looking at myself in the mirror now. I know, buried deep in there, is the girl I once was. The one that loved to dance. The cheerleader. The former military girl who was in excellent shape. She's in there, I know she is. She's buried under a fat girl that can't seem to lose the weight. She's tried every diet she could. She's counted calories, she's counted carbs. She's exercised, she's paid for HCG shots. And still the fat girl looks back at me in the mirror instead of the girl I want to be.

So far, I'm pretty lucky. For a fat person, I'm fairly healthy. But I know it's a matter of time. I know I'm a time bomb, waiting to go off, where I'll get worse as time goes on. And I tell myself I'm relatively health as my knees give out. As my hip gives out. As I struggle to sleep at night and struggle to wake up in the morning. As I deal with severe depression. As I spend every day so tired I don't want to move. As I deal with fibromyalgia. But I know others have it worse, so I deem myself "better" and "more healthy" so I can ignore what my weight is doing to me and how unhealthy it truly makes me.

I hate that I'm discriminated against in life for being fat. I hate that I'm discriminated in healthcare. This essay requirement alone is proof of that... would you make someone write an essay on why they need a knee replacement or a pacemaker? Or is it just fat people that need to convince an insurance agency to pay for what's covered under the policy they pay for? The discrimination we face as fat people is so pervasive and endless that we just put up with it. We do what we're told. We deserve it, we're fat.

I want to be in charge of my life. I want control over food back. I want to run that 5k in honor of my sister. I want to dance with my baby. I don't want to hurt. I want my life back. This surgery can help me in that goal.

Thank you.

[ladykatie_ 117]

I like proofreading and editing

Could you maybe e-mail it to me so you can see where I make notes and such?

[Menelly 56]

can you PM me your email?

[sofi_sunshine 14]

Just structure wise you could organize it into physical limitations and social limitations. Physical is everything in yourself that we chubbers can't or couldn't do. Social limitations is how our weight is a barrier to participating fully in life, like the seats being too small, weight limits, flying in a plane, wearing plus size clothes etc.

I'm an English teacher, so despite the run on sentence I literally just used, I know a bit about essays.

[gowalking 10,790]

Good luck my dear. Most of us on this site can understand all too well what you are going through. I do hope that you get the surgery so you can reclaim your life.

[Miss Mac 6,261]

Your lettter has a lot of good content. I particularly like the next to last paragraph about the insurance company itself discriminating against you. I did not have to write a letter, but I included one in my packet anyway, just for extra justification. In it I mention the family history of obesity and how it affects my life and all of my medical conditions that have resulted from being overweight. Feel free to use some of this content if you want to. I wish you good luck and good health.

Here is my letter. I Xd out proper names for this post.

This letter is a heartfelt request for BCBS to approve bariatric surgery to help me lose a significant amount of excess weight that has caused me many chronic health issues and has seriously affected my quality of life.

My adult life started at 108 pounds at graduation, at a time when I was both anorexic and anemic. The reason for that was deliberate. I did not want to be morbidly obese like the rest of my family, many of whom weighed over 300 pounds. My oldest brother died of a heart attack at the age of 47 – at a weight of 420 pounds. My mother died at the age of 67 because of an abdominal aortic aneurism. She was 5’2” and weighed 320 pounds. My father survived two heart attacks and eventually died from a stroke. Two of my sisters have been large from childhood and currently weigh over 300 pounds as do many of my cousins.

Since my late 20’s I began having problems controlling my weight and I consequently yo-yo dieted for three decades. Boy-oh-boy, I feel like I tried everything that came along, from South Beach, Sugar Busters, food Combining, Weight Watchers, Richard Simmons, even the Dolly Parton Diet, among many others. Remarkably, I did have 50 pounds of success with the Atkins Diet twice, and gained it all back much quicker than I lost it.

For about 15 years I have been taking medication for chronic high blood pressure while working physically demanding jobs. On 9/11/2010, I suffered a Cardio Vascular Accident. Due to outstanding care at Xxxxxx Xxxxxxxx Hospital in Xxx Xxxx, Illinois (where I met Dr. Xxxxxxx Xxxxxxx and changed to his medical practice), damage was minimized. The most significant lasting effect was loss of balance and altered proprioception. This has rendered me to be a moderate fall risk and forced me into an early retirement from federal service. I am unable to leave my home unassisted and can no longer drive because even though I can see, people and curbs and cars are not where I think they are.

In 2007 my right knee had to be replaced. At that time, my weight was around 180 pounds. I gained even more weight during recovery and eventually had to have a partial replacement of my left knee on 11/7/2012. Osteoarthritis is another issue that has hijacked my health. My vertebrae have degenerative disc disease and my body is failing to support my current weight which fluctuates from 220-235. On 2/14/2013 I had a three level ACDF. I also am being treated by the Xxxxxx Xxxxxxxx Pain Clinic for thoracic radiculopathy, sciatica in my left leg, and femoral nerve impingement in my right leg (which is exaserbated by my overhanging 53” belly).

In order to get around, I must use a cane, my walker, or someone to assist me because I cannot stand for more than a couple of minutes without high levels of pain in my back, sides, hips and legs. Also, this belly has affected my posture so much that standing up straight, although it can be done, is painful in its self. Turning over in bed is painful because my weight is difficult to maneuver with this pendulous belly. The skin under the overlap gets red and irritated, so I am using medicated powder per doctor’s orders.

At the time of the CVA, I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes, another condition than not surprisingly runs in the family. I am still taking meds for this condition to prevent transfer to full-on diabetes. My cholesterol is chronically high, so I am taking Lipitor for that.

Due to chronic digestive troubles and reflux, my primary care physician, Xxxxxxx Xxxxxxx, ordered an EGD on 2/22/2012. The findings then were: Irregular GE junction, Hiatal hernia, Acute gastritis, and Reflux esophagitis. The attending physician, Xxxxx Xxxxx, prescribed Omeprazole to relieve the reflux. Since the stroke, Dr. Xxxxxxx has had me on a 1200 calorie USDA Pyramid diet (allowing for a Mediterranean chef in the house). Dr. Xxxxx asked me to follow a 1000 calorie diet with adjustments for preventing reflux (i.e. no soda, citrus juices, caffeine, fried foods, etc

.

In spite of my best efforts at diet and exercise, my weight continues to rise. I am in pain every day, and my home has become my prison. I am taking Bupropion to battle depression and anxiety as I tend to have much worry about becoming a wheelchair-bound invalid. My weight issues have not been resolved even under my doctors’ care and concern, and I fear that I am becoming my mother and facing a premature death like hers.

Surgical intervention will certainly produce positive outcomes for me. I am not big-boned, but a naturally petite person who is carrying another person around her waist. I will follow my doctors’ orders and be the best patient ever. Your consideration is appreciated and I look forward to being a much healthier me in the future. Thank you so much - you are saving my life.

[Sleeveless in seattle 208]

Love the ending about making fat people write a letter...perfect!! I would concentrate more on physical and social limitations. I didn't have to write a letter (insurance excluded...self pay...sigh) but I made a list for myself and my husband as part of the decision making process. Here are a selected few for ideas (I had a lot).

-flying with a seatbelt extender and can't put tray down

-not fitting in restaurant booths

-chair arms digging into my hips

-huffing and puffing my way up stairs

-being excluded from activities because of exceeding the weight limit

[greensleeve 457]

How ridiculous! The hoops they make us jump through are crazy.

Do you have pressure incontinence? I would add that if you do.

Good luck to you. I think that doctors should be able to determine whether we are a good candidate, not some clerk at an insurance company.

[Writerjennifer 107]

It's a lovely essay. Please understand, I am sure it helped you to write it, and it's heartfelt.

However, the insurance company, i.e. the pencil pusher who has to read it, won't even read most of it. They will skim through, looking for specific information on how being obese negatively affects you.

First, I would not mention that you are mostly healthy. That is a red flag to the insurance to deny the surgery. Why would they approve when you're admitting you are healthy.

Second, list and explain the health reasons you are seeking surgery. For example; borderline high sugar or blood pressure, digestive issues, breathing problems, apnea, heart issues. Anything that your doctor is saying might be a precursor to a real medical problem.

Third, list and explain all the physical reasons you are seeking surgery, such as; inability to dance, run, walk up a flight of stairs, take your daughter to the park to play, ride a bike, do your job as easily, etc.

Forth, list and explain all the mental reasons you are seeking surgery, for example; you don't like your appearance, hate shopping for clothes, don't like going out in public due to fear of ridicule, have low self esteem due to weight and inability to lose and maintain a healthy weight thus far.

I work for the state. I read long letters all the time from people who want something from our office, and honestly, we are only looking for certain information. We don't need or want the life story and unfortunately we don't have time for it. It's nothing personal. The insurance company employee who reads your letter is an employee. They have guidelines to follow. Make sure you fit their guidelines and you will be approved.

Good luck.