Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

OK, how do you handle these kinds of situations?



Recommended Posts

I've been going to Water exercise classes for about six months now. Well, I made a friend there. She's a very nice lady and we get along nicely. So, last night we walked out together and we had been discussing some discomfort I have in the hip area. Most of you know that I've gone through major surgery to replace the hip joints and while I am doing unbelievably better, I still have some residual issues that cause me pain.

Anyway, like I said, we were walking and Barbara says to me that she also has aches and pains and it worries her because she sees someone like me who is thin and still has issues and she is bigger than me so it worries her. I hesitated...thinking what do I tell her? I really didn't want to give her the 'I was morbidly obese' story. Not because I'm embarrased, but because I'm done with the fat me. I buried her even though she still lives in my head (and I'm working on getting her out of there as well).

I finally decided to tell her that I lost weight to better my chances of success when I had the hips replaced. I didn't go into details..and didn't tell her I'm half my size. But I'd like to know how the rest of you handle situations where you have lost a significant amount of weight and you have met people who didn't know you before. I'm not talking about romantic relationships....that's for another thread. I'm just talking about people who you've gotten to know post weight loss.

People see me now and just assume this is the way I've always looked. I like that....it tells me that I've moved on and am leaving the fat me behind. But what do I do when my size does come up in conversation as it did last night?

Anybody else out there who went through something similar and have some advice on how to handle this?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hmmmmmmmm.................interesting question ! I think that you handled it very well, and while you dont "owe" anybody a backstory on your former size, it is part of your past journey. Being that your friend was discussing weight and hip problems , and you have that experiance in your own life, I think you could share your past and how you solved some of it with WLS. You are a great role model for others that are trying to lead a healthier life by getting a stronger , healthier body, wheather it was done by WLS or not. As far as people whom ive met after WLS . ? If the conversation warrants it, I say one sentance and drop it. If they are curious and ask a ? or 2, im happy to share. If not, we move on.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I ran into a similar situation except in my scenario, it was someone I've known a very long time who is a little more obese than I was . I see her bout every 3 - 4 months on special occasions. She always compliments my wt loss and asks me what I'm doing and I give her the spiel about eating right and exercising yadayadayada. Anyway, one day I noticed the sad look in her eyes when she was telling me about how she'd lose just to regain and gain more than she lost and exercise was hard due to her weight and she had no energy and hated how she looked and felt. I told her bout my surgery, swore her to secrecy as I still have no intention of sharing it with my hubby's family and that's who she is close to. She's making plans for WLS in the near future. Made me feel good that my journey might help her.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think you did the right thing. That fat girl is a person of the past. Why have new people in your life know you as a former fat person when you have worked so hard?

Sandy M - I think you did the right thing too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Mr.Kantos

      Just signed up. Feeling optimistic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Frugal

      Welcome to Frugal Testing, where we are committed to revolutionizing the software testing landscape with our efficient and affordable solutions. As a pioneering company in this field, we understand the challenges faced by startups, small to medium-sized businesses and any organization working without budget constraints. Our mission is to deliver top-notch testing services that ensure the highest quality of software, all while keeping your costs in check.
      Frugal Testing offers a comprehensive suite of testing services tailored to meet diverse needs. Specializing in different types of testing including functional testing, automation testing, metaverse testing and D365 testing, we cover all bases to guarantee thorough software quality assurance. Our approach is not just about identifying bugs; it's about ensuring a seamless and superior user experience.
      Innovation is at the heart of what we do. By integrating the latest tools and technologies, many of which are cutting-edge open source solutions, we stay ahead in delivering efficient and effective testing services. This approach allows us to provide exceptional quality testing without the high costs typically associated with advanced testing methodologies.
      Understanding each client's unique needs is fundamental to our service delivery. At Frugal Testing, the focus is on creating customized testing strategies that align with specific business goals and budget requirements. This client-centric approach ensures that every testing solution is not only effective but also fully aligned with the client's objectives.
      Our team is our greatest asset. Composed of skilled professionals who are experts in the latest testing techniques and technologies, they bring dedication, expertise and a commitment to excellence in every project. This expertise ensures that our client’s software not only meets but often exceeds the highest standards of quality and performance.
      Frugal Testing is more than just a service provider; we are a partner in your success. With a blend of quality, innovation and cost-effectiveness, we are here to help you navigate the complexities of software testing, ensuring your product stands out in today's competitive market. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      I have no clue where to upload this, so I'll put it here. This is pre-op vs the morning of my 6 month appointment! In office I weight 232, that's 88 lbs down since my highest weight, 75 lbs since my surgery weight! I can't believe this jacket fit... I am smaller now than the last time I was this size which the surgeon found really amusing. He's happy with where I am in my weight loss and estimates I'll be around 200 lbs by my 1 year anniversary! My lowest weight as an adult is 195, so that's pretty damn exciting to think I'll be near that at a year. Everything from there will be unknown territory!!

      · 3 replies
      1. AmberFL

        You look amazing!!! 😻 you have been killing it!

      2. NickelChip

        Congratulations! You're making excellent progress and looking amazing!

      3. BabySpoons

        So proud of you Cat. Getting into those smaller size clothes is half the fun isn't it?. Keep up the good work!!!!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 1 reply
      1. BabySpoons

        That's brilliant! You've done amazing!! I should probably think about changing my profile picture at some point. Mine is the doll from Squid Games. Ironically the whole premise of the show is about dodging death. We've both done that...

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×