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I know the Dr. And the seminars tells you that you will be emotional and have lots of different feelings. I thought I knew what to expect, but I am much more emotional than I thought I would be. The thing is I knew that I was making the incredible change, but I never thought that this was going to be as hard as it is on my husband. Taking care of me since my surgery has been a struggle for him. And he is so afraid that I am going to eat something that is not recommended for my transition to each phase. He is also afraid that something terrible will go wrong with my sleeve. I am worried to, but he is more so. I am not sure if the reason why he is so worried and frustrated because he has not read enough on the gastric sleeve or maybe I am not educating him well enough. Any thoughts? I wanted to go through this process for a lot of reasons, but one of my main reasons was for him so I can have a healthier life. I have found that we are bickering or arguing a lot more lately and it all comes down to this change. Will these emotions between us go away? All I know is at this point he makes me cry sometimes and I make him frustrated.

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That's sad that you and your husband are at each other at the moment. That won't be helping your recovery much, you need as little stress as possible. It's a very intense time and you are both going through your own emotional roller coaster. I was having trouble deciding weather to have the band of the sleeve. I was concerned about the extra cost and the sleeve being more extreme but I didn't like all the risk surrounding a band. My husband helped my chose the sleeve over the band by researching and looking on forums he thought it was a better opp as I did and help me make peace with the struggles in my head. Now he's right on side, he asks lots of questions and I tell him exactly how I feel (good or bad), he still looks into things about the sleeve like after care programs and things and he's really positive about the whole program. He lets me take the reins when it comes to my aftercare and just supports me with the things I tell him I need.

You are very precious to your husband and this op is a very big deal to some people, I think some people really struggle to get their head around what happens next. Maybe if he reads some of the conversations on the forums and chats to a few people. I take my husband with me when I see my dietician or doctor if he wants to come. It helps him learn hearing things first hand. I'm sure your medical team wouldn't mind chatting over the phone with your husband to set his mind at ease and answer any if his questions. Hopefully the extra information will clear out the grey area for him. He may be feel a little useless and less frustrated. More knowledge of the procedure will help him feel confident when it comes to your aftercare.

I hope you both start to see eye to eye soon and both start enjoying your new life together x x x

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I'm one week post op and going through the same thing. My boyfriend has been taking care if me but with my emotions and anxiety about something going wrong with myself has made extra tension. I'm an emotional roller coaster going through the same thing. I'm also going through some WTF did I do to myself??? I keep hearing this is the hell week and it will get better.

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I am just 4 weeks out and a emotional mess. Crying and suffering from fear and anxiety that won't be able to cope. Fear that I won't be able to ever eat again without experiencing nausea. I too am frustrated. I keep praying but still suffer from "stinking thinking". Has anyone else gone through this? Please help.

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Its as if u wrote what wad in my heart and mind.....I just had this convo with my hubby last night and he did say..... he wouldn't know what to do without me he just wants me back to normal. He says I'm never Happy anymore I seem depressed and sad since the surgery so he's wondering if I did the right thing. Now I find myself trying to act upbeat around him do he won't feel bad. But I will say some days are better than others. I'm 2 weeks post OP tomorrow! We have to get through this..... it can't always be like this!

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My boyfriend was terrified that i was going to die. He would freak out, then I would freak out, then he would make pie and I would lose my ever loving mind and he would say that was proof that he was right and this was a bad decision. Then I'd throw him out and he would lose his ever loving mind. It was CRAZY around here. It was fear driven emotional mayhem. I too really didn't know how bad it would be.

Six months later I am happy and healthy and he is thankful that I have a sex drive and take pride in my appearance now. We can hike together and I can help with the snow shovelling.

Its hard when someone changes your life. Compassion will see you to the other side. It was tough putting my man through that but rather that than congestive heart failure, chemo or dialysis.

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If you are acting like (or feeling) you are sick it will worry you and everyone around you. I was out shopping a week after surgery and feeling like a new person. I could not be more happy. Yes I still worry, but before sleeving I was depressed and hardly left the house. I think the winter doldrums might be a causation of some of the emotions felt here. I also read a lot of posts, and a common thread is about exercising any way you can and get that blood pumping. I am 67. I cannot do as much as most of you but I am so excited. BTW I gained my last 30 lbs. being on Prozac for depression, which made me more depressed. Good luck to each and every one of you. Linda

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    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

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