Today I stopped to pick up a cake for my mom's bible study and decided to pick up some cupcakes for my boys.... I got home, placed them on the table and went on about my day then I decided to weigh myself and since I'm at a stall I got sooooo upset/disappointed that I marched right up to the table gobbled TWO whole cupcakes while in my head praying to feel what DUMPING feels like!!!! After I was done stuffing alllll those calories and sugar down my throat I felt horrible and threw it up!! I feel like I can't win:( I claim to have will power and enough motivation to do this but there's times I just want to throw in the towel, accept I am meant to be FAT and give it all up!! Help... This is emotionally harder than physically!

I have felt the exact same way the last few days. I feel like I'm doing so great with the diet and exercising yet I'm not lifting the weight at 9 weeks and only a loss of 39 lbs it sucks. I see others losing sooo much more and I keep wondering WHY NOT ME? Maybe I want it to fast not I just want to see it keep dropping so I'm encouraged to keep going. When I'm in this place where I can't lose any I'm like wth might as well enjoy my fatness. Then I feel guilty for feeling that way and upset thinking I spent all this money and took that surgical risk for nothing. Stay strong though reaffirm every hour every day whatever is needed I keep telling myself I still can't eat as much as I did before so I still have to lose weight eventually. Prayers for you.

We need to be like BFF's lol my bf bought home THEE best smelling chicken salad yesterday and I wanted to throw in the towel and devour the whole bowl but I didn't and it's so hard bc I miss all the things I used to eat and I'm a big cooking show fanatic and watching all the cheesy, salty, meaty, scrumptious food I started to regret this BUT we have to have faith in ourselves and remember we can do this....if you ever need to talk feel free to inbox me!!

Raquel..I'm sorry to hear you are discouraged! Let go of any lies and remember these moments can actually make you stronger!!! You are very brave and I'm encouraged by your honesty and willingness to share!

Thank you and big hug!!!

remember tomorrow is a new day!!

The emotional is much worse I think. I am upset that I am not losing as much as other people. I swore I wouldn't compare, but I am doing just that. I am not getting my protein in or enough I should say. I know that is the problem. Are you guys getting in all yours?

39 lbs loss in that short of time is awesome. You ate putting too much pressure on yourself. Just let it happen. Even if you think you can eat a whole salad, cupcakes,etc, ut wont actually fit. You will get sick. Trust in the surgery. You are not your weight! You are a person and I will be damed if a cupcake or scale or salad is going to tell me whos boss

I wish I had some great inspiring words but this has been such a roller coaster for me as well. I'm two months out and like you I'm down 36 pounds. I've been pretty good with everything. I'm tired of no bread or veggies or fruit or salad or a cookie or pizza etc. I wanted a salad soooooo bad yesterday but no I picked two sandwiches a part and gagged the lunch meat down for protein (I was at a work meeting and traveling). I got so damn upset I couldn't (didn't have room) for a salad I went in the break room and ate part of a brownie. I felt like a freak in the room, no salad??? I guess Better than the whole brownie, it was huge, but felt like crap mentally. WTH. All I can say is one day at a time. You ate the cupcakes. I ate the brownie. We can't pity ourselves. We made this choice to be healthier. We will have slip ups. But overall we are doing well. Hugs!

I wish I had some great inspiring words but this has been such a roller coaster for me as well. I'm two months out and like you I'm down 36 pounds. I've been pretty good with everything. I'm tired of no bread or veggies or fruit or salad or a cookie or pizza etc. I wanted a salad soooooo bad yesterday but no I picked two sandwiches a part and gagged the lunch meat down for Protein (I was at a work meeting and traveling). I got so damn upset I couldn't (didn't have room) for a salad I went in the break room and ate part of a brownie. I felt like a freak in the room' date=' no salad??? I guess Better than the whole brownie, it was huge, but felt like crap mentally. WTH. All I can say is one day at a time. You ate the cupcakes. I ate the brownie. We can't pity ourselves. We made this choice to be healthier. We will have slip ups. But overall we are doing well. Hugs![/quote']

I can eat salad.... Why can't u?? I eat my protein and my small salad or just fresh spinach and I feel fine, is this normal?

Thanks for everyone's encouraging words, I know this isn't going to happen over night but, gollie I wish it would-- I've come to realize I'm not ever content with what I've got and I should just enjoy my journey

Oh I can eat it there's just never really room if I try to get all of my protein in. I can eat almost anything which makes it hard too. So far no dumping. Which is good and bad.

Ok so you ate the cupcake. It's ok. Just move on from it. We Are all going to make mistakes along this road as long as we don't continue them. I ate cheese doodles last night. Ok I got sick but I've failed to. During out first meeting i was told that if we were going to have cakes or chips save them for special occasions. So just pretend you were at a Bday party. We are all working our butts off but sometimes we are going to make a mistake or 2.

Ok so you ate the cupcake. It's ok. Just move on from it. We Are all going to make mistakes along this road as long as we don't continue them. I ate cheese doodles last night. Ok I got sick but I've failed to. During out first meeting i was told that if we were going to have cakes or chips save them for special occasions. So just pretend you were at a Bday party. We are all working our butts off but sometimes we are going to make a mistake or 2.

Thank you MalyssaSue! I guess what really did it for me is that I stuffed/inhaled TWO of them in like less than 1min and standing up ... I felt disgusted with myself afterwards like I had just done something so shameful!!! But you are right, we are all going to make mistakes! Having surgery doesn't mean we flipped a switch to being perfect!! It's a daily commitment!

Today I stopped to pick up a cake for my mom's bible study and decided to pick up some cupcakes for my boys.... I got home' date=' placed them on the table and went on about my day then I decided to weigh myself and since I'm at a stall I got sooooo upset/disappointed that I marched right up to the table gobbled TWO whole cupcakes while in my head praying to feel what DUMPING feels like!!!! After I was done stuffing alllll those calories and sugar down my throat I felt horrible and threw it up!! I feel like I can't win:( I claim to have will power and enough motivation to do this but there's times I just want to throw in the towel, accept I am meant to be FAT and give it all up!! Help... This is emotionally harder than physically![/quote']

No dumping after eating tjem?

No dumping after eating tjem?

No I don't dump... Wish I did!

No I don't dump... Wish I did!

Oh, ok, don't beat yourself up.

Thank you MalyssaSue! I guess what really did it for me is that I stuffed/inhaled TWO of them in like less than 1min and standing up ... I felt disgusted with myself afterwards like I had just done something so shameful!!! But you are right' date=' we are all going to make mistakes! Having surgery doesn't mean we flipped a switch to being perfect!! It's a daily commitment! [/quote']

Just so you know I had a mini cupcake and a small piece of pizza last night and a chicken wing. It was our monthly girls night and I wanted to join in. So today I will just work out extra at the gym. It happens.