I love my job but I sooo do not want to talk about my surgery on the job. Most of the women I work with wear a size 0 a couple of them are size 3. Any ideas to not have to talk about my weight, surgery or diet?

Unfortunately when your co workers start seeing how great you will look and how much weight your down there will be rumors and questions raised.. Take it from someone who works with adjudicated youth and about 200 employees. I've heard it all from my "skinny" "co-workers" and they really are curious, inquisitive only because they care about my health and get along very well together. But, working with detention centers I am the largest employee at the company. The only advice I can give is to either "hide it" and state you've been on strict diet- which is partially true; or, be blunt- "I had surgery, and dont wish to talk about it any further and ask they respect your wishes."

I have already gotten into very heated discussions about "taking the easy way out"- EVERYONE here knows WE HAVE NOT TAKEN THE EASY WAY! We have chosen a new lifestyle after exhausting everything else. I have also had the very inquisitive employees who want to know more about the procedure, etc. I simply say I had a lifestyle change please respect that and leave it alone. I dont want to get into a long story with everyone as to what i did, how i did it, etc.

I know not much help... But the best I can give.

I am still pre op but have already lost 20 lbs in the past month everyone thinks its because i gave up soda and started exercising. I tell everyone i am just trying to get healthy for my kids.

I work in a very pubic role in my office interacting with co-workers, customers and potential customers daily. Avoiding discussions took far more energy then just owning and talking about what I'd chosen to do. Most people feel awkward since they don't know if you will talk about it, they worry if "how are you today?" or "you look great" will upset you somehow.

You don't need details just "I'm under doctors care working on getting healthy. After years of other methods we choose to use surgery with the diet and excersie. I have to stick with my diet and eating schedule that are very different from before, but otherwise its the same as usual. I'm just going to be just a thinner, healthier version of me around here" and if your sassy throw in a 'so get used to it!' for good measure.

I found most people were positive and supportive when I gave this elevator speech. The ones who wanted more information that I really didn't want to talk to I told to google RNY, "they explain it better then I do".

The thing that bothers me the most is when someone says ahhh u don't need that surgery just don't eat or do it on Ur own errrrr people just don't understand .

_{All of my friends think that I am just being lazy and that I can do it on my own, but I can't!! The weight doesn't come off.... this is a very last resort.}

Of all of the questions that you'll see on the forum, this one may be the most personal decision everyone has to make for themselves. People are going to notice your weight loss. And some are going to be openly curious about your success. Others will be curious, but no so open. Some may be openly critical about your decision. Others will be critical, but not so open.

Personally, I am a decidedly private person but given the realities, I opted to just tell anyone who asked. Anyone who thinks "diet and exercise" is a viable solution to a worldwide obesity problem of epidemic proportions is at best ignorant of the disease, and at worst, a fool. I found that ALL of my friends and by far the vast majority of everyone else was incredibly kind and supportive. And as noted above, many asked and continue to be very interested in how I made the decision, how tough has it been and would I do it again - they are interested either for themselves, for loved ones, for friends or even just curiosity. I enjoy sharing my experience and many have expressed their admiration for my willingness to talk about it openly. If you're honest and open about it, it very quickly becomes yesterday's news and everyone just moves on with life. If you try to keep it a secret, I think that just adds fuel to the rumor mill and that can linger for a long time.

Some people will be ignorant but ignore them. I work in surgery and we have all done these surgeries so we know what's involved. But I made the decision after 10 years of thinking about it. You did it to be healthy, it's not a magic pill it is hard work.

1 guy at work had this done and now 4 more of us are having it.

You don't owe anyone anything. Just yourself

Thanks everyone for your support. Today is day 13 after surgery and I had to go to a dinner meeting tonight. People were mostly glad that I am back. But one person who knew I had to have the surgery for the 2nd time because my 16 year surgery opened was the so horrible she actually said it was self inflected because I had the previous surgery. I just wanted to cry. I responded that she could say that about most people with many of problems like herself who have untreated medical illness.

I agree it is a personal decision. A coworker had her surgery last August and just told everyone she was on a protein diet under her doctors care. There was a lot of rumors. When she found out I was going through the program she talked with me. She said she hadn't wanted to hear the negative comments and also what if it didn't work for her? Well it certainly did and she's now lost over 100#. She is a great source of information for me. She is now telling people that ask how she lost the weight. I am a very open person but I did only tell family and close friends I was in the program. My boss new and was very supportive. I work in the healthcare field so you'd think it would be more acceptable but I find the green eyed monster can rear its ugly head in some coworkers. I opted to let my office staff know when my surgery date was scheduled and was surprised how many people supported my decision and said if anyone deserved it I did as they had seen me struggle and they have seen me continue to exercise and eat healthy. Of course there was the green eyed monster staff member that was oh poor me I wish it was me ..don't get crazy about it blah blah blah. I told her she could have it done also buy no alcohol for awhile which shut her right up lol. I have decided that I am only going to welcome positive people into my circle and if they are negative about the surgery I am going to let them know I will not tolerate that and to please not discuss it with me. I was also surprised how many people asked for information and one person has already signed up for the program! The more the better !