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A psychological blow



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Pam,

I can honestly say that I read and re-read those messages several times the week before, the day before, and the day of surgery. The first time I went for the surgery and it got cancelled, I was relieved in a way because I felt it was my chance to re-think it all. Unfortunately on the way home I started feeling very depressed because in the time it took for me to get home, the whole surgery could have been over and I could have been moving on to the first stage of recovery.

I had my chance to re-think it and I knew that I had put all that time, effort, and $money$ into this, so while sitting in the pre-op room I was not in a normal state of mind. Now that I did go through with it I am so, so happy that I did.

The post-surgery pain is slight, and the discomfort is not all that great, but I feel better every day. The pain and discomfort will be worth being able to feel comfortable in my clothing and stop being so self-conscious every single day from here on out. I look at it like this- For 36 years I've eaten whatever I wanted and however much I wanted without regard for health and/or nutrition. Now it's time I make up for it. Having lost 35 lbs on the pre-op Protein shake diet was a miracle, and I felt so good. But I know for a fact that I could not have kept it off for 6 months, let alone lost more. And since I need to lose an additional 70 lbs, I knew that I still needed the band to help me.

As far as the fear of not waking up after surgery, I'm willing to bet that the statistics would show the chances that you will are real, real good. I put faith in the doctor, the hospital staff, and especially the anasthesiaologist and it worked out in my favor. If there is anything I can do to help you- email, phone call, etc. please let me know. Having just gone through it, I am very willing to share my experience.:P

Jeff

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I know I was nervous- kept thinking of leaving my children as orphans! (well with their dad my dh) but still! I just had to remember that most likey the surg was not going to kill but the fat was definetely going to kill me for sure if I didnt get it off!

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I was ready, albeit nervous.

But my mother, who was elated I was having the surgery and kept bugging me to have it before I even seriously considered it, was my caretaker for the day. And, she told me afterward that when she walked in and saw me in that gown with IVs that she wanted nothing more than to grab me and get me the heck outta there. That was probably exactly what your wife was going through the first time.

I actually had to go back and edit this post because I didn't read far enough to see that you'd gone ahead with the surgery.

CONGRATUATIONS!!! :confused:

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I wasn't afraid of surgery, I was afraid of failure after. But my dh is the best in the world. Actually the day of surgery I was fine (except for hating the IV..my veins were the only skinny thing about me). They put the IV in, my wonderful doc came in and talked very seriously to me and very encouraging and assured me that he would not do anything to endanger my health if thing didn't look right in there.

By this time I think it was dh that needed sedation. The nurse gave me a little happy juice, and about 30 minutes later the anethesiologist came in and said time for kisses...dh and I told each other we loved each other and just when his lips touched mine, I was out....the anethesiologist had PERFECT timing...I think he had been practicing that move....lol

After it was over I woke up joking with the doc and the nurses...and the doc said I want her up in 30 minutes....my room wasn't ready so they moved me to a quite part of recovery and found me a chair...and I was up in 30 minutes...whew...I stayed overnight and was up by my own choice about every hour or so walking the hall....did not have even one moment of gas pain from the surgery...

Best thing I ever did for myself!!!!! I would do it again tomorrow it I had to

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I've been reading and reading this forum for months now and have not really felt the need to post, until now.

I'm a 6'1" male who was 324 lbs upon the start of the 2 week Protein shake diet. After the 2 weeks I am down to 297 lbs, which feels great. So now I had the thought that I had lost that much weight in that much time running through my head. I've done the same yo-yo's that the majority of you have and although I know that I would never be able to keep this much weight off, I've also never lost that much. Period.

I never thought I would have elective surgery on myself for any reason. Then I saw the lap-band commercial and started researching it. It seemed like the perfect solution for me. The planning started and as time went on I couldnt help but question my decision. After the realization that I just need to proceed with this surgery that I've been planning for months, I went to the hospital yesterday (1/15/07) morning. I had mixed feelings because I was so nervous about having surgery, but I got up the nerve to do it. To make a very long story short, after changing into the gown, having all the vitals taken and an IV put in, the anasthesiaologist noticed that I had some congestion in my head from a cold last week and she suggested that it would be wise to wait a few days until I get rid of it. She let my wife and I make the ultimate decision, and we chose to wait.

Mentally I am crushed. To get so close while being so uncertain and then to fail is devastating. I was very nervous, wondering if having the surgery in the first place was the right decision. Then to actually get prepped and have to cancel was unbelievable.

My question is- am I the only one who was sitting on the bed subconsciously noting the building exits before they could put me to sleep (in case I wanted to run, haha) or does everyone go through this?

Now that I have to wait 2 more weeks I fear that I might have second thoughts. I am terrified of having any surgery in general, not just bariatric. Anyone else have similar thoughts? How did you overcome? :help:

Wow, what a flashback. I can honestly tell you that the lap-band has changed my life sooooo much for the better. Since January 1st, I've lost 110 lbs, lost 8 inches in my pants size, and gone from a XXL shirt size to a Large.

I know the band isnt for everyone and that it definately is not perfect, but I am a huge fan. It is as much a mental change as a physical change. If I can help anyone out with my experience, please feel free to ask! :clap2:

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I didn't have those thoughts at all. I was so excited to have it done. Was I scared of dying on the table? Yes. But I didn't care. If you are having second thoughts, I think you SHOULD wait.

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Wow, what a flashback. I can honestly tell you that the lap-band has changed my life sooooo much for the better. Since January 1st, I've lost 110 lbs, lost 8 inches in my pants size, and gone from a XXL shirt size to a Large.

WantTheBand --

WOW - congrats on the hard work. :clap2::clap2:110 pounds in 6 months is awesome. What a great inspiration for me. Thanks for sharing!!! I am just beginning the journey, but i am very excited that i am. :clap2::clap2:

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I totally understand how you felt/feel. I was banded on 6/20/07. The day of my surgery while waiting for "my turn" to go to the surgery room I kept thinking I was going to run out. My surgery was delayed by 2hrs. due to the Dr. running behind, which didn't help the situation. I kept asking my husband if I was doing the right thing. He pointed out that my mom died at the age of 64 and my dad who had 2 heartattacks, by pass surgery, a massive stroke and now had his leg amputated due to his diabetis and he just turned 65. And asked me how I wanted to live. I knew that even though I was scared to death I had to choose to live ...if not for myself but for my 3 kids. Even when I was on the table counting backwards I was still wondering if I was doing the right thing. I can tell you now ...NO REGRETS!! I haven't even been banded 1 month and I am already off from my Lipitor. I know the new way will not be easy but neither would be going through what my dad is...

Have faith...you can do it!!

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when my dad got his elbow done a few years ago he DID jump up off the table pull all the IV's out and run down the hall in the hospital gown the ones with the breeze in the back :D

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this is an excellent thread... I haven't been banded yet, but have had several surgeries... I think EVERYONE has those thoughts going thru their heads...

We're really tougher than we give ourselves credit for, huh?

I bet the OR & recovery room staff could write some interesting stories about what people say as they come to.... LOL!

katie

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I kinda had a similar experience. As I approached 58 I began to feel panicky about ever losing wt successfully My Ins would cover only a bypass surg so I bagan what turned out to be a long process aith a huge number of hi tech texts along the way. After about 4 months of testing they told me I was ok to have the surgery. So I went into surgery (Jan 2007) and when I awoke they said I was NOT a candidate because I had a "Massive" left diaphram hernia. Two weeks later (still a bit stunned) I'm at the specialist office. More tests. Yep, giant hernia. THe guy askes if I still want the bariatric surgery. At this point I hardly care but I say, sure...whatever. Then he changes his mind and sys no to the bypass but offers me the lap band.. (as of Jan 1 t he ins will cover it) Whatever I reply. SO! Now it's kinda like we'll do the hernia surgery, which is a big surgery and if it seems reasonable we'll do the lapband. A definate maybe right? Well on Fri the 6th of this month I go in for the hernia surgery. When I awaken 4 hours later they tell me I have no hernia. I have another issue with my diaphram (which I won't bore you with) but they did the lap band (which they think may not work d/t the diaphram issue.) There were some small but painful complications and, frankly it took me a week to get past all that and figure out that I HAVE A LAP BAND! So now I've got to figure out what to do with it. I never really expected it to happen and was not at all prepared.

Had my two week check up today and all is well. I've lost 12 lbs and am being graduated to pureed foods.

What does this have to do with you???

Well, life throws us curve balls. It's up to us to figure out what to do with them. You have an opportunity to make a very positive change in your life (as do I). You've already made the decision to have this procedure done. You've done the research, asked the questions, searched your soul and reached a conclusion. Don't over think it now. Move forward. Meet this opportunity head on and soar! You'll do great...The decision is made. Don't revisit it. Just move forward...I believe in you...

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This is just an opportunity to lose a few more pounds, clean up that liver, de-tox your bod from carbs, practice coming off coffee if necessary......may be the best thing that could happen. Use the time well and start makings lists of things you can do next year at this time that you can't do now!!

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Congratulations on your absolutely tremendous success!!! From skeptic to complete convert!! AWESOME! I'm very happy for you!

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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