mr nice guy has left the building! The fat lady has sung. Adios

[westcoastlady 39]

My name is XXXXX XXXXX and I have just hijacked my wife’s account under the name of westcoastlady.

Twelve hours ago I took a call from Alex, the owner of this web site and was asked several questions that concerned him. I did not appreciate the way the call started off by pretending to be a future patient of wls and asking me if he could book an appointment through me with a certain doctor. I felt he baited me to see if I was a coordinator or someone in a position that can make a booking and receive a monetary fulfillment. He failed! After being in the conversation for approximately 10 minutes, Alex requested that we “ease off” on promoting certain surgeons, hospitals and hotels but that I should continue to speak the truth as I know it. He suggested we not give out our personal phone number but to discuss my thoughts and concerns over the chat lines (which I will not due to the fact as getting lambasted when discussing someone else’s doctor that they consider a hero). He did not request my wife to leave his site but to “just cool it” abit.

His concern is that my wife has given out our own personal home phone number to approximately 12 people to help people making evaluations for future patients easier.

I have been to TJ 13 times, once for myself, once for my wife, three times with friends and eight times with complete strangers whom I had only chatted with on this site and the OH site.

I KNOW most of the TJ surgeons, all the major hotels and all of the hospitals and clinics and I feel I have a vast amount of knowledge to share.

But regrettably, this will now come to an end since Alex has had a few complaints about me (us)… as he put it… us being sketchy by giving out our private phone number and then offering my “free service”.

We get 20 to 30 emails and phone calls a week of people saying thanks but it just takes a few complaints to take it all away. I even have a “new friend” in TJ right this minute that we are in contact with several times a day. Seems she thought it would be no problem being there by herself but now wishes I was there. Not everyone needs an advocate, but ones that do sure appreciate it.

I know my wife has posted that I have gone down with complete strangers and acted as a patient advocate. This is true. I speak for them when they can’t because of the pain, the language barrier etc. I make them walk when they don’t won’t to. I go buy bags of ice for the nurses’ station for all patients because the hospital/clinic has none. I carry their bags, I call their loved ones, you get the drift.

What is my charge you ask? It’s nothing. Zero. Nada

Why can I do this? I’m retired. Retiring before I was 50 has made life grand and we live it large. I have nothing but free time and a damn plane ticket is less than $500. One hundred percent of all the people I have accompanied are VERY thankful and most of them have bought us thoughtful gifts and trinkets to show their appreciation. And to be very honest… I am considered kinda wealthy. Some say stinkin rich lol. I say healthy!

I have even paid the difference for a young man to switch doctors to another (an $800 extra) so he would not take a chance with a certain doctor where I have personally witnessed two deaths.

In closing I always looked at it as paying it forward. I had such a bad surgery at such a bad clinic that had a doctor on board that wasn’t a licensed doctor, had to get fixed up a year later… you get the picture. My wife had a great surgery with Dr. Kelly and his team. MBC sometimes uses a bait and switch tactic when it comes to inquiries, changing hospitals and hotels without advising you, actually just taking the cheaper way out.

Again… I have vast knowledge of what goes on down there and have tried to share it at my expense. To those who read this and are concerned that I will renege on my future commitments… please feel comfortable as that I am a man of my words and I will follow through.

I have asked my wife not to offer my services to any others and I feel that I have paid it forward as much as I can. Thank you all for your patience reading this mumble jumble. Seems that when you’re upset you have a thought every 5 seconds but not enough time to write them down.

To those of you that complained that we had ulterior motives, your wrong and that’s your prerogative and we hope you have an uneventful surgery with whomever, wherever and whenever.

The drama is over, no more suspense!

[Sleeve Goddess 75]

Wow that was an awesome read. I had my surgery hear in the states and didnt have to go the other route. But I sure as hell wouldve appreciated someone like you. When you give you give from the heart and you wear it on your sleeve. Sad how so many people are motived by money which is the real reason this site exist.

If your words are true you and your wife will be blessed beyond belief. Karma is real.

Kudo's

[NoneYa 380]

I don't know you or your wife and I'm not "in on" whatever the goings on here are. I will say that if you have been freely giving of yourself to help others with no ulterior or monetary motive behind it then perhaps those issues are coming from the ones that complained and set about attempting to stop you. Did you inadvertently step on the toes (or wallet) of a few that are being paid to set patients up with Drs other than those you support?

[westcoastlady 39]

Wow that was an awesome read. I had my surgery hear in the states and didnt have to go the other route. But I sure as hell wouldve appreciated someone like you. When you give you give from the heart and you wear it on your sleeve. Sad how so many people are motived by money which is the real reason this site exist.

If your words are true you and your wife will be blessed beyond belief. Karma is real.

Kudo's

And we both believe in Karma. Thank you

[westcoastlady 39]

I don't know you or your wife and I'm not "in on" whatever the goings on here are. I will say that if you have been freely giving of yourself to help others with no ulterior or monetary motive behind it then perhaps those issues are coming from the ones that complained and set about attempting to stop you. Did you inadvertently step on the toes (or wallet) of a few that are being paid to set patients up with Drs other than those you support?

Possibly but I would hope not. We try to see the best in people. And YES, we do NOT support all doctors. XXX is very adamant on who he works with, what hospital and damn... even the hotel. So maybe some toes have been stepped on but he does not compete with companies doing what he does for profit... I think. Anyways, thanks for the words.

[No game 14,437]

Perhaps you should find another forum...

This may not be the platform for you.

[ca_medic5 75]

Yes sir does sound like u stepped on a wallet . And it all comes down to money it doesn't matter if ur in USA OR MEXICO OR ANYWHERE

[NellieBean 70]

Maybe you need to consider that this is just a forum to everyone who posts here and it is Alex's life work. I think that he might be protective of the community and is protecting himself (of course) and the people who come here to share their experiences.

I have great respect for him reaching out to you personally to discuss. He could have just banned and blocked you.

Instead of trying to make this into something nefarious and feeding the forum trolls, try to understand the actual reason he most likely contacted you.

[Butterthebean 8,146]

Not to question your motives, but if you are doing this out of the goodness of your heart (which it appears you are), then why do you give a crap what Alex says or does? If you believe in what you're doing, keep doing it.

[No game 14,437]

Yes.

Personally I feel the big problem with the Mexico forum is it is mostly shameless promotions of certain doctors either by coordinators or people trying to get referral bonuses.

Also people pushing certain doctors and issuing dire warnings about the other doctors.

It's worse than a used car lot with a bunch of desperate salesmen hanging about...

Every time I see a new person here trying to do research I feel truly sorry for them because they get a slew of people (always the same ones) jumping on them telling them their infomercial, then telling them to pm them so they can "help"

[KatInFL 216]

Maybe you need to consider that this is just a forum to everyone who posts here and it is Alex's life work. I think that he might be protective of the community and is protecting himself (of course) and the people who come here to share their experiences.

I have great respect for him reaching out to you personally to discuss. He could have just banned and blocked you.

Instead of trying to make this into something nefarious and feeding the forum trolls, try to understand the actual reason he most likely contacted you.

I tend to agree with this POV. I never complained about your presence, personally, nor do I really think any real solicitation was involved. I do think that you walk a fine line, though, even offering services for free.

I also wonder about people who "need" a companion and a source of information after their helper or companion are gone... have they truly walked the experience on their own enough to make proper use of the tool that is WLS? Also, I think that saying one person has had dozens or more experiences with one doctor and can say with certainty that is the right choice, without someone doing the research and making the determination on their own, is a little concerning.

As for hitting someone in the wallet, I think that statement is ludicrous. If that were the case, Alex would be limiting reviews and conversation on surgeons and coordinators. I've never seen that happen, in my year of lurking and over another year of posting.

~Kat

[KatInFL 216]

Yes.

Personally I feel the big problem with the Mexico forum is it is mostly shameless promotions of certain doctors either by coordinators or people trying to get referral bonuses.

Also people pushing certain doctors and issuing dire warnings about the other doctors.

It's worse than a used car lot with a bunch of desperate salesmen hanging about...

Every time I see a new person here trying to do research I feel truly sorry for them because they get a slew of people (always the same ones) jumping on them telling them their infomercial, then telling them to pm them so they can "help"

It's why I always tell new people they are better off making a list and researching doctors based on what is a priority for them. Not just based on anecdotal information....because that's important, but not all of the information needed to make an informed decision.

At the end of the day, I do think it's the ultimate leap of faith. Choosing a surgeon in a foreign country where the standards don't exactly translate apples to apples is difficult and overwhelming. You hope you've done enough research and are making the right choice.

But that right choice isn't going to be the same for everyone and it would be presumptuous of me to tell everyone they should choose the surgeon I did. I'm happy to share my experience, but that doesn't guarantee my surgeon will meet the needs of someone else.

I don't know that there's a way to keep people who are providing information on surgeons based on some sort of bonus from posting here. (Although shame on them...) I think that keeping out solicitation and advertisement in posts is probably the best that can be done. But this forum is one of the best resources I found to start researching surgeons and coordinators.

It's not a perfect system but it's far beyond anything else I was able to find when I was looking.

~Kat

[No game 14,437]

It's why I always tell new people they are better off making a list and researching doctors based on what is a priority for them. Not just based on anecdotal information....because that's important' date=' but not all of the information needed to make an informed decision.

At the end of the day, I do think it's the ultimate leap of faith. Choosing a surgeon in a foreign country where the standards don't exactly translate apples to apples is difficult and overwhelming. You hope you've done enough research and are making the right choice.

But that right choice isn't going to be the same for everyone and it would be presumptuous of me to tell everyone they should choose the surgeon I did. I'm happy to share my experience, but that doesn't guarantee my surgeon will meet the needs of someone else.

I don't know that there's a way to keep people who are providing information on surgeons based on some sort of bonus from posting here. (Although shame on them...) I think that keeping out solicitation and advertisement in posts is probably the best that can be done. But this forum is one of the best resources I found to start researching surgeons and coordinators.

It's not a perfect system but it's far beyond anything else I was able to find when I was looking.

~Kat[/quote']

I think a good rule of thumb is to look at the poster click on their profile.... Then look at their posts. Do they contribute to this site on a semi regular basis? Do they talk about things in their sleeved life other than their experience with their awesome doctor? and hospital? and coordinating company?

If not??

Well, you know what they say about a duck

[KatInFL 216]

I think a good rule of thumb is to look at the poster click on their profile.... Then look at their posts. Do they contribute to this site on a semi regular basis? Do they talk about things in their sleeved life other than their experience with their awesome doctor? and hospital? and coordinating company?

If not??

Well, you know what they say about a duck

I couldn't agree more. I'm always a little suspect when people only contribute in one place on the forums or are posting for the first time and it's some sort of review on a surgeon. But I'm always a little suspect when people ask for or share private information with no relationship or extended interactions, too. Maybe I'm just cynical and cautious by nature.

~Kat

[Butterthebean 8,146]

.....

Well, you know what they say about a duck

Uh....no. What do they say?