I thought it might be a good idea to have a thread where we could discuss the different challenges/issues we face as being single and banded.

I'll start with introducing myself. My name is Chris, I am 32 and live in a suburb of Boston. About a year ago I got out of a 5 year relationship and have just casually dated (online dating) since then. I have decided to take a break from dating for a bit, so I can focus on myself and adjust to living life as a bandster. (I was just banded on 10/2). One of my biggest concerns when I start dating again is if/when to tell that I am banded. It's not that I don't want to tell people, it's just that my idea of great dinner conversation does not include discussing my weight. Overall I would say that I have a great life. I have a good job, a very supportive family, and lots of friends. I am happy to be taking control over my weight and issues with food, and am excited at the prospect of my future as a not-so-fat woman.

I look forward to meeting more single bandsters and hope this thread takes off!

Chris :cocktail:

Missy, good luck in your search. Having the weight loss really makes it so much easier to get on those web sites.

I used to be scared to death that I would run into my ex and now I hope I run into him. I have lost so much weight since he broke my heart, and I will have a great looking guy with me when I do run into him!

Yeah Missy I dated a guy that worked way too much and made no time for me. Actually I dated two of those and then realized at some point if the guy REALLY wanted to be with me - he would. We're too great to settle for anything less than everything we want and deserve in a relationship so I 'm glad you broke it off. Have some fun dating! :biggrin:

Denise happy to hear things are still going well for you and your man. :scared2:

Chrispy I never would have dreamed I could have found such a great guy on match.com. There are just so many losers in this town.

This certainly has been a dream come true. You and I are both a match.com success story!

Best of luck to the both of you. Everyone is deserving of someone who will give them the attention and time that they need and while he was a very nice guy, we just couldn't make it work. My prince charming is out there somewhere....:eek:

Ladies, ( and interested gentlemen)

I am to be banded in Sept. So I was at a support group meeting and some of the folks that already have bands were sharing their experiences trying different types of protein drinks.

This one guy speaks up and says: "Yeah, I told her that if she found the empty cans in the trash can, to buy that brand of drink, and if she found them on the counter; not to but anymore of those. He was referring to the lady sitting beside of him. I felt so sorry for her.

Am I just way too independent or what. The only thing I got out of his comments were that he is an a__ __. He had better be glad he aint with me. Such a pig. Where do some men get the attitude that women are there servants?

I just kept thinking; Is anyone else thinking the same thing I am thinking?

Best of luck to the both of you. Everyone is deserving of someone who will give them the attention and time that they need and while he was a very nice guy, we just couldn't make it work. My prince charming is out there somewhere....:biggrin:

Missy you are right! I met so many losers over and over again for the past 3 years. When I was on our first date, I called my daughter and said

"hes a keeper!" I was excited the minute I met him, instead of how it always went before, being disappointed after emailing and finally meeting. If you're doing online, meet them as soon as possible so you know what/ who you're dealing with. Even the ones with pictures often don't look like their picture.

Missy you are right! I met so many losers over and over again for the past 3 years. When I was on our first date, I called my daughter and said

"hes a keeper!" I was excited the minute I met him, instead of how it always went before, being disappointed after emailing and finally meeting. If you're doing online, meet them as soon as possible so you know what/ who you're dealing with. Even the ones with pictures often don't look like their picture.

Yeah I've met many guys over the years from the internet/dating websites and only 1 time that the guy had old pictures and wasn't as cute in person. I usually don't wait around for months to meet someone. In my opinion if they don't want to meet you soon, then they aren't really into meeting at all.

only 1 time that the guy had old pictures and wasn't as cute in person.

only one? I couldn't believe the one I met a few months ago. When we met in person after talking on the phone for a couple of weeks, he had no teeth.

In my opinion if they don't want to meet you soon, then they aren't really into meeting at all.

And then I have found there are two reasons for this:

(a) they are already involved and they think they can "innocently" dink around online; and/or

(:tt2: they look nothing like what they are trying to sell themselves as online

UGH!!

I have met my share of great guys through travel or friends or running around Vegas, but none of them ever live close! So, I try online once and a while and A or B applies. Frustrating!

Yeah, it took me 3 years to find this one. I went on a lot of first meets from online dating sites but there was absolutely no chemistry. I never used to believe in chemistry but the minute I met him, I wanted to grab him and kiss him. We had been emailing and talking on the phone, and he had his picture on match. He's much cuter than that picture though.

all right I have to post even though it's been awhile, I decided to post a profile on match.com about 6weeks ago, quite a few emailed and messaged me, interesting how the caliber of men increases the more weight you lose, I am very picky about who I meet only because of the schedule I have for work but had been emailing with this one guy which advanced to talking and texting and then we met, little awkward at first because you say so much when your chatting but we have been out a couple of times so far, he even came by after work to walk my dogs with me (we live in seattle so the traffic is INSANE here) and is making me dinner this weekend, I never expected to meet someone so rad on match.com but just felt like sharing my success with you all!

Best of luck with all your journeys, whichever way they take you.

Tara, you give me hope....

I agree. I am still in the state of shock that I met the love of my life on match. com

Being able to check the box "average" instead of the "few extra lbs" box

was a big help.

athinner, I'm meeting the family tomorrow, kind of thrown on me yesterday but why not eh? they're a huge part of his life so we better figure out now if i'm going to fit with them, big steps but it will be all right, it's a birthday party so better than sitting around a table with lots of pressure.

Wish me luck!

Good luck! It's good that he wants you to meet the family . guys usually don't want to do that unless they are serious.