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Well, I know that it will be difficult. Peronsonally, I HAVE to lose 10 lbs. by surgery date or the surgery will be postponed, so the pressure is on and I just have to keep on telling myself that I CAN do it! :nervous

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Ha! I'm even worried about being able to comply with the PRE-op diet!

I found sticking to the pre-op the hardest thing so far! I had a serious case of "Last-supper syndrome" and kept thinking I needed to eat all the junk stuff while I still could.

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What are anyone's thoughts on a surgeon trying to "push" the surgery? :D

Interesting question.

I wondered about that too, and this is how I look at it. The surgeons spent a lot of time and money to learn how to be surgeons. They are doing this to earn a living, and yes it is a business for them. They may push the surgery because it makes them money, but I also believe that most of them also know they can help people. I've talked to/listened to 2 of the surgeons at the practice I went to, and I'm convinced that they enjoy what they do because they can change someone's life. And yes, get paid for it.

Even this early on, I feel like they gave me back my life. And hope that it will only get better. That's worth a lot more then I paid them.

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It is unethical for a surgeon to "push" an elective procedure on anyone. However, the surgeons who believe in the band, believe it helps to save lives and improve the quality of each life of a person getting banded. And you know what? They're right!

Betsyjane, my surgeon is banded.

Get banded. It'll change your life. I flew to Miami from NYC this weekend for a Bar Mitzvah. I wouldn't have gone if it were 6 months ago because I would have been self conscious and worried about the plane travel and to go so far for a weekend would have been too tiring. This weekend wasn't tiring at all. It was fun! And, I had a few hours between services so I went to the beach. It wasn't planned, but I was able to walk in a regular store and buy a beach towel and a size 14 bathing suit. It was a little small, but it was FINE and I felt so normal to be able to just walk in any old store and buy a bathing suit.

Get banded.

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I definitely agree that it would be unethical for a surgeon to "push" a surgery. I feel that my surgeon is very excited about the surgery and how it does help people. He truly seemed genuine and honest, and he was very personable. It still hurts that my sister was so aggressive in trying to "push" onto me that the surgeon is making everything sound better than it is...he did talk to me about complications, risks and the like, but he also talked with me about how life changing the tool can be.

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Yes, a surgeon is going to tell you the good points about being banded. Hopefully tell go through the risks as well, but I'm sure you've read about most of those in your own research, at least being on this board, if nothing else.

I think probably there is that element of "if we have to suffer she should too", which isn't nice, and they probably don't think it up front, but more in their subconscious. Maybe just quit talking to them about it altogether. And if they bring it up, just say something to the effect of "Look, I'm doing this, and I really don't want to hear what you have to say on the subject anymore".

*hugs*

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Unfortunately, that is pretty much what I think will be the best way of handling it, such as so many other issues in my family...avoidance...:phanvan

It makes me really sad though to have to take that approach, b/c this is such a big change in my life and I really do want them to be a part of it, but it just seems that they dont understand! :)

I truly, truly appreciate all of your support! :)

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The negatives come from everywhere. IF YOU know in your heart this is the choice that is best for you then DO IT. I had a 65ish year old neighbor who is like an uncle, I trusted and told him. His reply was you dont have to go to that extreme to be pretty. :phanvan It not about being pretty, I already have that. Its about health!! I know its best for me; so I dont disclose the information to anyone now!! People dont understand being fat or the consequences of it.

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Aw, my fat family has never been able to be supportive about food issues. We all struggle. I have to just let it go in one ear and out the other, go my own way, and love 'em anyway.

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I think that you'll only have to avoid the issue for a while. They are bound to be happy with you on some level when you start losing and they see that it works. At THAT point, they might even be convinced to join you :girl_hug:.

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I totally understand everything everyone is saying and thank you! Yeah, I think that they are skeptical that it is a risk (since it is a surgery placing the foreign body in your stomach) and they think that i will just gain all of the weight back. I cant help but think that my sister secretly wants me to fail so I can still be "large" with her. We have other issues besides this, obviously, which make me distrust her and I guess those issues are truly surfacing during this difficult time.

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I was hoping that this would be inspring to them, but it seems that it has been anything but. A lot of times I feel like I just "can't win" with my family. :faint: Well, we all have our family disfuction I suppose..right now I just need a lot of support and encouragement and I guess I"ll have to seek it otherwhere. Like here! Thank you! :girl_hug: :)

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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