Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
  • Appearance

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

All The Single Ladies...

So, I've been reading about everyone and wanting to lose weight and be there for their spouses/kids/grandkids. Now I want to hear from the single ladies (men). How have you been now that you've lost (losing) weight? Do you have dating worthy confidence now? Have you been on dates? Have you discussed the surgery? How have you handled going out to dinner? I want all the juicy details. ^_^

Personally, the depression looms as I turn 35 in a couple days and I'm alone (no kids). I haven't been on a date in maybe 5 years. This is so embarrasing. I look forward to having the confidence to go back online.

  • Replies 62
  • Views 10.6k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Well I am married, however I did go out with my girlfriends and I practically had to fight the guys off. I did tell my hubby he was gonna have to buy me a bigger diamond ring to scare off potential s

  • I met the love of my life post sleeve (2-3 months post-op, 50 pounds down) Definately made a big difference in my confidence. I could be myself. I think you will find dating is much easier post sleeve

  • My first first date ever was a success! We talked for over an hour and a half and it never got awkward. I am reasonably sure he'll want to see me again.

Featured Replies

Not exactly on topic but yesterday was at Dr for checkup and a good looking guy in waiting room about your age. Not many men in program that I've seen and he was relatively thin so my first thought was, "He must be in the wrong office." The nurse came out and called him. I thought, holy cow, if I were single, I'd be all over that! Wanted to know his story. So proud of him. Guess the moral of the story is- go get 'em tiger! Girls will notice you and it's likely you will be a good catch. I would let honesty prevail. And be sure to check out women in the waiting room because they ARE checking you out!

Sleeved 8/21/12, 43 as of Wednesday, single mom... I tell my son(14) jokingly all the time that I trying to find him a daddy. I've not made it out in the dating world as yet but my confidence is there. I am trying to get my eating/chewing together first (don't want to scare anyone off), thinking about trying online first.

  • Author

I had a plan to start online dating as soon as I hit 150. I made a profile about 2 weeks ago, have been messaging guys on the site. The weight loss also gave me the confidence to respond to a personal ad on a local message board. We've been emailing and texting. I have a date to meet him for coffee on Monday.

please let us know how it goes! :wub:

Hi I'm 39 and was sleeves on 7/30/12. I'm down 28 lbs so far. I'll be honest, my main reason for doing the surgery was because of still being single and wanting to marry and have children. I'll admit in these first 5 weeks I have noticed a little more noticings from men. Everyone has always told me it wasn't my weight but I thought and felt differently! We will see.....

Sent from my iPhone using VST

I've wondered about dating too and how soon people have felt confident post op to start meeting new people? A few of my girlfriends have met men online but I haven't done this. I have been a single parent more years than as a coupled parent. My surgery is in 4 days and I probably will be so busy learning how to eat again for awhile that this topic won't come up. As to telling someone I'm dating that I had surgery, I personally am uncomfortable sharing until I was absolutely certain he meant something to me. I haven't told my family or kids, and only two friends are aware.

If you're eating out while dating and you haven't shared your surgery yet, just order a small, appropriate entree and eat your little bit. Spend time talking during the meal so that he won't even notice you're eating just a small amount. This will help you eat slower too. You could always say that you don't eat many carbs and that's why you avoid the bread basket, potatoes, etc.

I'm married, but I have quite a few business lunches and I use this philosophy.

Good luck girls!

  • Popular Post

I found this thread interesting and kept thinking that the VST forums is a great way for single people to meet up with each other. There are literally 1000s of men and women who are now feeling more confident, looking hot and waiting to meet each other on this forum ( not talking about the happily married ones of course). Or maybe there needs to be a WLS Dating site. :)

I found this thread interesting and kept thinking that the VST forums is a great way for single people to meet up with each other. There are literally 1000s of men and women who are now feeling more confident' date=' looking hot and waiting to meet each other on this forum ( not talking about the happily married ones of course). Or maybe there needs to be a WLS Dating site. :)[/quote']

That is a great idea Andy! I'm married but if I wasn't I know I'd be very interested in meeting a guy who was going through the same lifestyle changes. Think how great that would be!

I am still only a couple months out, but have noticed more attention from people in general. No dates yet - I haven't ventured on to online dating in quite a while. I think once I'm down about 50 more pounds I'll be ready to look into actually dating. For the time being I'm just open to possibilities - we'll see what happens. I too would love a WLS dating site. It'd be nice to be with someone who knows what I'm going through.

Hi I'm 39 and was sleeves on 7/30/12. I'm down 28 lbs so far. I'll be honest' date=' my main reason for doing the surgery was because of still being single and wanting to marry and have children. I'll admit in these first 5 weeks I have noticed a little more noticings from men. Everyone has always told me it wasn't my weight but I thought and felt differently! We will see.....

Sent from my iPhone using VST[/quote']

I agree. Ppl will say that it's not the weight but they don't walk in our shoes.

2013 is my year....SD 12/3/12 BK NY

Who's going to start one on line wls dating site they can add it to this forum

Sent from my SPH-D700 using VST

  • Popular Post

Great topic! I was widowed at 45 (now 59) & have never had a single date since that time. I know that 20% was my love (still) for my late husband but 80% was my weight. I got the sleeve done with 100% intention to improve my health.

Now that I am down almost 25 pounds, I am beginning to get noticed. It will still be a while before I am confident enough to date. But the deal breaker at this stage of my life is anyone that makes fun or dislikes obese people. I believe it is the last "acceptable" form of prejudice.

  • Author

Well, I just tried googling it but no site for post WLS dating. There are sites for overweight people, but that's not what we are looking for. Hmm, I bet we could find someone to create one. Everyone put their heads together STAT.

There were lots of posted subjects about dating after surgery. I thought this was an interesting article.

http://www.wlslifestyles.com/cached/_downloads/1790/Getting%20Out%20There%20-%20Dating%20Following%20Weight%20Loss%20Surgery.pdf

I brought up the notion prior in this thread and thought it would be fun to try my hand at designing and building one( I am a software developer).

From the responses so far, it would appear such a site and app for the phone / tablet would be very useful for people like us. It would specifically be for people who have gone through WLS because otherwise folks can go to any of the other online numerous sites like eharmony, etc. it would also be a fun project to work on outside of my day job as a software developer. Would folks be willing to pay for it or should it be free ( sort of my gift back to the WLS community)?

Join the conversation

You can post as a guest; create a free account to track replies, follow topics, and be part of the largest weight loss surgery community.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.