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What reason did you give your job for being out of work?



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I had plans on telling only my daugher and husband. I have felt terribible guilt on not telling my sister who I share it all with. I told her I had suregery coming up and I opted for the ovary thing. Well today I fessed up and I feel like a weight has been lifted. I cannot lie to her of all people. She is very supportive and I actually sent her the info. She said not one has to know and she will not tell people which she will not. We are very close. As far a work people I am not telling anyone.

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I really didnt want anyone at work to find out..I told a couple close friends about it...I couldnt take sick leave due to at my job it "doesnt constitute sick leave usage" so I planned mine for the first day of my week vacation and was back bright eyed and bushy tailed a week after feeling fine...Of course the choice few that I told were happy that I had it done and shared it with everyone else...Now I kinda feel like everyone is watching me and if I dont lose I am a failure...Everyday someone asks "so how much have you lost now?" and its kind of annoying especially when your stuck at a certain weight for a while, but I just laugh it off and go on! But I know in the end I will be alot healthier and happier about it regardless if its slow...After all, it is better for your body if you lose it slow anyways!

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My Dr wouldnt even schedule me for my second fill yet...He told me that once I started losing less that 4-6 lbs in a month to come in for another one...They said that a second one is basically a must because after a while you lose some fatty tissue around your stomache making the band loser

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I was able to keep my LBS a secret until I got back in the states. I didn't want my co workers trying to talk me out of having surgery in Mexico, putting in their 2 cents worth, etc. I work in a small office and everyone knows everyone's business but I think once mine was out in the open it was much better for me. My eating habits have changed drastically and people would have noticed that at least. My boss had to know because I was going to be off work for a few days (I ended up taking a whole week off! Seven incisions vs. the regular four....) and he was real understanding. Tell your co workers if you want to but they are going to find out when you start dropping weight and your eating habits are different.

banded 071506 Dr Garcia, Monterry, Mexico www.litenfree.com

335 highest

317 pre op

288 today (My one month anniversery!)

145ish goal

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I told my closest friends at work and my back up who does my job while I am gone. But as far as my boss and everyone else I just told them I was taking a four day weekend and was back to work on Monday. No one evr questioned me about it or anything. But now I really don't care who knows what I did because I am in a good place about it and am doing this only for myself. And if I don't want someone to know then I feel it is my business to not tell them. However I won't lie about it if I am asked. :gossip:

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debbie,

I feel the same exact way as you, it is a personal journey and no one elses business, for the preops I have told people that I need to have tests done for a possible hernia, I would have said gallbladder but I still have it, so it is also setting me up for my excuse for time off at surgery. I will just say the need to operate on the hernia! Best of luck to you!

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I used the gallbladder excuse. most of the time they also put you on a special diet beofre surgery. I also have NASH so the whol diet thing goes right along with that.

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Cindyn

I am in the same boat. I only told one of my sisters. My other sister doesn't know. I chose not to tell her because she doesn't have very good bounderies. She tends to tell people/friends things that I find are very personal. I do, however,feel terrible guilt.I don't know what I will do later on after the surgery but for now I chose to leave it the way it is. As far as my co-workers, it doesn't bother me in the least. It's my business and not anyone elses. Good luck.

Regards,

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My co-workers have seen me yo-yo up and down from size 22 to size 8 for 8 years now. So, I am lucky that they will not be suspicious of any weight loss drop.

They have seen me try every diet imaginable with great weight loss success. It's the keeping it off part and then passing my original weight that is my problem. Hopefully they will just think I finally found something that works for me.

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I told my boss and a really good friend at work who is discrete but don't want to tell anyone else there at all. It's a very personal thing to me - don't even know if I'm going to tell my extended family, just kids and forum friends. I'm going to just take a vacation week so no one will think anything of it.

I have to say that these few that I have told were extremely supportive and positive :)

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I think you have some pretty good ideas here. I told my boss i was having minor surgery and he just asked if it was anyhing he needed to be concerned about and i said no and that was it. Later i asked him to take a client to a coffee house for a meeting becaue he told me the guy was just getting over the flu and i mentioned I couldn't afford to get sick while i was recovering. He did it! I don't have any other co-workers to speak of so it wasn't hard for me. However, I have always manintained a don't tell policy - i've only told my sig other and one close friend (and that was 6 months after surgery). I'm a very slow loser and esp glad now i didn't - i too have endured years of everyone inc strangers commenting on everything i put in my mouth, what my size is, should i be eating that, etc - i just can't take it. if you can, i would just take vacation days and keep my mouth shut about anytype of surgery - it is none of their business.

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When I get banded next month I too plan to keep it a secret from family and friends. I am a stay-at-home mom so I don't have the work issues to deal with. However, a few years ago I dealt with the same thing when I had breast reduction surgery. I told my boss I wished to keep the reason for my short-term-disability and FMLA confidential. End of story. I worked for a health insurance company. I know about HIPAA laws (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) and medical confidentiality is taken very seriously these days. So you are not obligated to tell anyone (not even your boss) anything about your medical business. Co-workers can sit and wonder why is she absent (maybe she went to detox, maybe cosmetic surgery, disease treatment, a sex change, hemoroid surgery, a psychiatric institution???) Let them guess. Who cares what they think. Just tell them you prefer to keep your all your medical matters private and keep your head high. The only people who need to know are human resources - and they must keep this info confidential too.

Good luck!

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sweesue,

Does Human Resourses need to know what the surgery is? Or the letter could state that I will be out for a week b/c I had surgery. (Not being specific on the type of surgery).

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I sent my request to my boss and wimped out and just said " I need to take these days off as vacation time"

I totally lost my nerve! I just think it would get back to people that I was out for a medical reason and then the girls I work with would harrass me. I mean, they are great, but the peeps I work with don't even understand the concept of "personal and conifidential" I have a ton of vacation time so that part is OK.

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As far as what details Human Resources needs to know, I'm not quite sure. If your company employs and umbudsman, that may be a good place to start. Try to obtain an STD form and take a look at it and see what it says. Also, ask your doctor. According to your doctor and your insurance company, you require surgery that was deemed medically necessary. What more do they need to know?

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

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        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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