Regrets?

[JennJ.RN 10]

First off, please don't flame... I am just venting here.. Immediately post op- and POD1 I was feeling immense regret over having the surgery. I know a lot of that was pain because I was in a lot of it.. But now here I am POD6 and I don't know if I am still having that nagging feeling of at least some regret over having the sleeve done. I don't know where this is coming from or why. I am grateful for my life, my family but just need to hear if others have went through a period of regret (or maybe I am mourning my fat self).... THanks in advance,

Jenn

[teambrown4 19]

I felt the same! The emotional roller coaster is very hard! I'm one month and two days out and feel nothing like I did one week out or two weeks out... It jut all gets better in time.

I've actually gained weight, so add that into my regret?!!! But I know in time that will change too!!!!

Talk to people often in the same situation and it will be a huge help!

This too shall pass!

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Of course you are mourning your former self, you just amputated a part of you, which will lead to a diminishing of your physical self! It is natural and healthy to go through and recognize a mourning period.

As for my regrets, only that I didn't do it sooner, and perhaps hindsight being 20/20, I would have taken better/gentler care of myself in my first 3 months, would have hired a personal trainer, but that's it!

[MSMONIK 0]

I felt the same way I had surgery 03/08 and I think it's the pain that did it for me. I am slowly coming around but every time I get that pain in my stomach my regrets come back. I just kept asking myself why did I have to get surgery to be healthy why couldn't I just eat right on my own.

[Rootman 1,101]

Yep, in fact I would bet you'd be hard pressed to find ANYONE who didn't have at least SOME "buyers remorse" post op. The physical ramifications of the anesthesia and sudden loss of caloric intake take their toll, let alone the psychological and spiritual strain. Post op I was fine till I got back to my hotel room in San Diego, then I fell to pieces. I was actually worried someone in an adjoining room might hear me and call the front desk or police. I was wailing and carrying on something fierce. 'WTH DID I DO TO MYSELF? WHY OH WHY DID I DO IT? I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA DIE". Tough times.

Now about 14 months post op I think it was worth all the pain and anguish. It has literally saved and transformed my life. I'd do it again in a heartbeat if I had to.

NO REGRETS

[mnbsleeve 87]

I didn't have this regret per se... however, it's so natural to feel this. After all we just underwent a major change to our bodies! We have had a familiar way of being for years... since birth. We know how we feel, we understand our body cues and sensation and suddenly, all of that is out the window. It's a huge adjustment both physical and psychological. I've been very, very happy BUT I will not lie I had a couple of episodes where I woke up in the middle of the night with the thought "OMG what happened?" and "It's IRREVERSIBLE." Once just recenty at 9 months out! It passed of course and I truly am happy with my decision. But for me both co-exist at the same time: I am happy AND at times I am confussed and concerned about this new body and all the unknowns .. many still to be determined. If that's not a reason to have some apprehension, I don't know what is. I do remind myself that even with the most joyful experiences in life (marriage, children, new jobs, new homes... whatever) these feelings Are completely normal and part of the human experience when we face change. I hope these posts are helpful to you Jenn. Sending many, many heartfelt good thoughts your way!!!!!!!!

[kimmy*custis 276]

I can honestly say NO REGRETS whatsoever! I am having the best time with my friend sleevie! She likes me, I like her! My only "regret" is that I didnt do this sooner!

[massindex 346]

I won't say that didn't have regrets that first week in that I had to have surgery to fix a "weakness" with me. I also recognized that without it, I was heading down a path of destruction. I began to look at it like getting mental health assistance with depression. I just needed something to get me over the hill. I know I would have lapses but for the surgery. With the help of the surgery and determination, my life is 1000 times better now than it was a little more than 13 months ago.

[Liberated Sleeve 148]

Brief fleeting moment during my first walk around the hallway of the hospital, but I had read enough on this board to know that it was coming and to my great delight it left just as quickly as it appeared. I am very happy with my new sleeve - 11 days out and still on Clear liquids. Kinda bored some with the clears but really don't have an appetite so it's not like I am craving anything. Chewing gum and popsicles for the need to chew.

[Shells 40]

LOL I was ready, happy and super excited until...my regret came 5 mins right BEFORE the surgery, a nurse dropped an IV Fluid bag, and I thought they were going to kill me or make a mistake. I freaked, started crying, my mom's crying, an RN started tearing up because I was shaking and saying "what am I doing to myself, is this worth it? I'm gonna DIEEE wahhhhh" Thank god for my surgeons team they held my hands, told me their names and what they will be doing and that it's their job to protect me and it's my job to make sure this tool is used the best way possible to get healthy. I calmed down then knocked out and woke up sleeved. I honestly think I was getting restless and just wanted it to be over with already. I woke up just happy this surgery was over and done with and ready to start healing. No regrets since. Well, I did not chew ground turkey one time completely and it came back with a vengeance, I do regret that. I learn quick

I realized that being scared is normal and okay. It's not okay to be this weight and eat so much food and not feel satisfied, this is not healthy. I improved my health and there's absolutely no regret in that whatsoever.

[JennJ.RN 10]

WOW! Thanks guys for all the replies. It's good to know I am not alone. I knew this was permanent and it just hit me these last couple of days that it really is. I am happy as the pounds are coming off like never before, I just want the negative feelings to be gone! Thanks again for the insight, I really appreciate it!!!!

Jenn

[VACookey 111]

I just had surgery on the 7th and I'm having serious regrets right now. I had a great day Monday (and even posted about it here, but said I could be in pain that night). Sure enough, I had the worst night ever. I've been in so much pain the last couple of days. My back hurts, which makes me hunch over, which makes my stomach hurt, so I try to straighten up. I can't sit, I can't lie down, I'm weak, I'm hungry, my stomach growls like never before. Everything is horrible and I don't know what to do about it. Drink more Water? It hurts. Suck on a popsicle? It hurts. And don't even get me started about wanted to actually EAT something.

~sigh~

Ok, rant over. I could just be stressed out because my husband is out of town and I feel all alone. I probably should just suck it up and get over it. Not like I can do anything about it now anyway.

[JennJ.RN 10]

@Debby, I understand completely. My first day home (and the next) I could not find a comfortable position to be in. That was awful. My doc said to use heating pad for my back/ice for belly. I have also been loving the gas x strips--supposed to help with trapped gas from procedure too! I am totally sympathizing with you Hang in there!!!!!!! Jenn

[cab0ad 3]

I got my sleeve on the 13th and I am definitely having some regrets right now! I just want to feel "normal" again. i want to eat with my family. I want to not have to obsess about sip sip sipping. I want to be able to sip without chest pain. I want to be able to get out of bed without my husband having to help me! dang, I'd give my right arm to have some corn beef and cabbage today! all of that being said, I'm sure I did the right thing. each day has been a little better. no leaps and bounds for me yet. I still struggle to get 36-40 ounces of liquids in. my abdomen is still in major pain on one side. still can't get out of bed on my own. can't bend over. my doc said I could start yogurt yesterday but I didn't because I couldn't even get in half the Water I should be getting. I am still 5 pounds UP since surgery (I gained 15 from surgery for some reason. lots of liquid retention for me and it isn't all falling off like it is for everyone else). BUT... I keep reading these boards and comforting myself knowing I am not the only one feeling this way. I read the boards to see that everyone is so thankful they did it after a few months. I read the boards and see how everyone's lives changed for the better after the transition. I just pray I have the strength to make it through my own transition and hopefully be just as happy and at peace in a few months as everyone else seems to be. I feel thankful to have these boards to talk with others struggling in the same way.

[adrimc26 7]

Guys at least you know that at some point you will get better. Would you guys rather keep on been sick called it Diabetes, high blood pressure, infertility. Those believe it or not are way worst than the "temporary" pain you're on. Take control again of your bodies and minds. Remember this is the first step towards a new life