New Shrink

[reallyrosy 161]

Dunno if this is a rant or not (but eventually everyone accuses me of ranting or being sarcastic so why not just start with a rant definition and get it over with?) but am sure someone will tell me....

Anyway, went to a new shrink. He used to weigh over 400#. He had one of the wlsurgeries --didn't specify which, and said "wt loss surgery don't work. You have to change your life style."

Ok. I knew that because wls doesn't change who I am. It just gives me a head start on the changed look (thinner). But it wrankled me to hear him say it. Point blank. Wls doesn't work. That means when this 'honeymoon' is over I'm due to live to fight some more?

Sh÷+_-t.

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

That is his take. I am a shrink and I would have told you that wls is a tool that can help you make life changing decision's about healthy eating and making healthier eating choices. I would also discuss with you how triggers can affect your eating. Your moods, and of course not all this in the first session. Shrinks can help you on your new journey. Good luck and this is a great choice to help. CONGRATS!

[reallyrosy 161]

That is his take. I am a shrink and I would have told you that wls is a tool that can help you make life changing decision's about healthy eating and making healthier eating choices. I would also discuss with you how triggers can affect your eating. Your moods, and of course not all this in the first session. Shrinks can help you on your new journey. Good luck and this is a great choice to help. CONGRATS!

He's offering to help me make lifestyle changes. Should I keep looking? He's the only one who 'admits to' or has a rep for working with bariatric patients.... I felt a bit "put off" by the blank pronouncement and the validation of my own arguments prior to surgery...but we all know it ain't the magic feather...there IS NO magic feather and probably any shrink could help? Right? And the world is full of unmarried marriage counselors...still a skinny shrink won't understand as well....

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

If you don't feel comfortable with him, then you should absolutely look for a new therapist. What I would do if I was looking for a therapist is call them up and interview them over the phone. Call at least 3 of them, and ask they if they have any experience with wls and if they don't, are they winning to do some researh on the GST. If they are, that's great, but it's really not about the surgery, it's about what's going on inside you that triggers you to eat. Mostly any therapist that you feel comfortable with and is willing to go the extra mile is worth giving a shot.

[andersonlj 32]

If he is a new shrink I would be looking for a different one. He is there to help you and support you through your decisions......not to pass judgement. WLS does work but you also have to be onboard with your decision and make some changes in your lifestyle. I would dump him like a bad habit and look elsewhere.

[lookingahead 7]

reallyrosy --- My thought is that you need to find someone that you are 100% comfortable with, and in synch with. It can take several false starts to find someone that you are in synch with (trust me from experience!). Anyone that specializes in addiction, I'd think would be helpful. Sounds like your guy is already coming into your relationship with a view on "your situation". I'd say tell him to take a hike! You are after all going to be sharing the most intimate details of your life with this person. Just my opinion.

[reallyrosy 161]

reallyrosy --- My thought is that you need to find someone that you are 100% comfortable with, and in synch with. It can take several false starts to find someone that you are in synch with (trust me from experience!). Anyone that specializes in addiction, I'd think would be helpful. Sounds like your guy is already coming into your relationship with a view on "your situation". I'd say tell him to take a hike! You are after all going to be sharing the most intimate details of your life with this person. Just my opinion.

100%???

And I know what he means by "wls doesn't work" he means unless its accompanied by a lifestyle change...so why would I object to that? How can u make a decision based on just one meeting? Maybe he knows how to effect a life style change??? And if I dismiss him out of hand, I'll miss that?

[reallyrosy 161]

If he is a new shrink I would be looking for a different one. He is there to help you and support you through your decisions......not to pass judgement. WLS does work but you also have to be onboard with your decision and make some changes in your lifestyle. I would dump him like a bad habit and look elsewhere.

After the "but" part above, is exactly what he means. So why dump him?

I don't get it. You really expect one meeting to be able to judge the provider? I don't. This isn't rocket science. Itss dealing with emotions and feelings.

[lookingahead 7]

Perhaps I didn't understand what your point / question was in your post then. Again, like I said in my post just sharing what worked for ME. I feel that you have to be able to connect with your provider, and this was something that I was able to tell fairly quickly if it was a good fit or not.

[circa 333]

I think people are reading the statement "WLS doesn't work" and getting riled up. They aren't comprehending the statement that occurs afterwards. Basically, I took it as him saying that this isn't magic. You have to WORK the tool. A hammer doesn't build a house, but it sure makes the job easier.

I think you may have found a no-nonsense person that's going to tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear.

[andersonlj 32]

If I went to my shrink and he told me that WLS does not work I would dump him just like I "did" dump my primary care doctor. I understand that just the surgery is not going to get you to where you want to be but the surgery is also a tool that will help get you there. If I would not have had the surgery I would have continued to yo-yo diet for the rest of my life and been miserable. It is untimately up to her if she continues to see this person but I would expect a little more support from my shrink of therapist.

[Dooter 1,457]

Quite a bold pronouncement he made there. Sounds like he's still working out some things himself.

I see this surgery as a "reset button" of sorts. I got to the point of choosing surgery BECAUSE my heart and mind are ready to live differently. However, my body is fighting me for every pound, so this surgery will help take the weight off and "reset" my body to a manageable place that I can fight to keep, because I'm so ready to do that. I hate food because it has consumed my life and I'm ready to beat it down! Subdue it underfoot!

He really should have qualified that statement. That's all I'm sayin'....

[PdxMan 4,292]

... or maybe, he knows what he's talking about. I'm guessing he had his surgery awhile ago. He may also be treating many other pre/post WLS patients and have some objective insight to the whole process. We are all pretty green here and very quick to jump up and yell, "VSG IS THE GREATEST THING EVER!!" I said the the same thing about my first wife, and, well ... that honeymoon is over and I am wiser for it.

I agree with you Rosey, one meeting can't be enough to determine this guy's worth.

As for everyone else who thinks WLS is the silver bullet to solve all of their weight issues and they don't have to do anything else, well ... this honeymoon will also end one day. Do you have the tools in place to ensure your success? I'm not implying I do, but I do know that by itself, WLS does not work. It is a tool that I need to learn how to use.

Sorry, don't mean to be contrarion, but I think he might have something there.

[andersonlj 32]

It seems that some people's opinions are the best...not pointing any finger....just saying and I know that some of you who have contacted me personally know what I mean

[reallyrosy 161]

...

Do you have the tools in place to ensure your success? I'm not implying I do, but I do know that by itself, WLS does not work. It is a tool that I need to learn how to use.

Sorry, don't mean to be contrarion, but I think he might have something there.

I'm figuring the shrink'll be one of the tools...yeah? Whatever, I need the support. Thanks for your feedback.