Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Advice please (this is slightly off topic)



Recommended Posts

I am fairly new to this forum (I have been lurking for a few weeks). I have decided to have the sleeve procedure done and I'm in month 2 of my pre-op weight management program required by my insurance company. I have already met with the surgeon that will be preforming the operation and have attended a wls seminar as well as the orientation required by the surgeon. I'm anticipating have this surgery Jan or Feb 2012 since January will finish my 6 months physician assisted weight management program. I'm 5'4" and currently my weight fluctuates between 315 - 320 and I have been heavy my entire life with right now being my heaviest. I'm giving you this history so it can help with the advice I'm asking for.

Today I was approached by my boss's boss (two levels up) and he was talking about flying me up to Chicago to attend a focus group work session for a high level initiative that is on his plate that has rolled down to my plate. I don't have an issue with the initiative and am taking ownership of it (it has been on my plate for a month now) and I think it is a great opportunity. This initiative is still in the development stage and while it is in development stage we want to look at it from a global holistic perspective so it can be implemented across my organization as a whole.

For more background info, I have been employed with this company for 18 years but I'm new (as of April of this year) to my current organization and I'm inline for a promotion come the end of the year. With that being said, I have a few concerns that I had hope I would not have to deal with until well after my surgery and after I had lost a decent amount of weight. I'm concerned about flying and if I would require to purchase a second seat. The last time I few was around 5 years ago and at that time my weight was around 280-290 and there were no issues. I didn't even need a belt extender, granted the belt was out as far as it could go and it took a little effort to clip it in but I managed.

As I see it I have three options:

1. I can sit with my boss's boss and talk to him about my concerns and let him know that I might need two tickets in order to fly up to Chicago for this meeting (which will be really embarrassing) and also let him know about my involvement with this weight management program so he knows I'm taking steps to improve my health and this shouldn't be a concern in the future.

OR

2. I can come up with a reason why I can't attend in person and see if there is an issue with me attending virtually (they are flying folks from all locations for this meeting, England, Tampa, NY...) so I"m not sure that will be an option.

OR

3. i can take my chances and have the company purchase one seat for me and hope that I don't get asked by the airline (not sure which one it will be) when they see me about needing an additional ticket.

I'm really torn as I don't want to ruin my chances of my promotion as well as I don't want the embarrassment of the conversation with my boss's boss regarding my weight. I know you don't have to be a rocket scientist to see I'm over weight so it won't be a big revelation. Also as we know those folks that haven't had to deal with a big weight issue are not aware of the things we deal with daily and I'm sure the thought of potentially needing to purchase two airline tickets for me hasn't crossed his mind.

So I'm open to any advice that y'all can give. I leave for vacation on Friday so I need to talk with him tomorrow if that ends up being the decision. (I know this is short notice so I hope i get some replies).

Thanks for reading.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

well i have flown several times in the past few years and havent had to buy another ticket, however i dont require an extender. i have seen other people get them and not have an issue. are they flying you business class, because those seats are a little more roomy. i would ask your boss if they are flying you business class....also some of the airlines offer a last minute upgrade for anywhere between 50-100 dollars. you might want to go to the ticket counter and try to up it. i hope it all works out for the best.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Have your company pay for one seat and if the airline makes you pay for a second, pay for it yourself. But if you can buckle yourself in with an extender, do it. Maybe fly during an off-time so the flight isn't full and the chances the airline will charge you are lower.

Don't talk about personal matters with the boss's boss. He thinks you are the person for the job. Get that promotion!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Great advice here! I agree, I wouldn't bring the weight/seat topic up with the big boss. Also, you can probably find a seat measurement online and then find a similarly sized seat and try it on for size to see what you think! Usually it will be an administrative assistant of some sort doing the booking of a flight so you maybe even be able to ask them if they can let you know the upgrade cost to business and that you may want to do that at your own cost if it's an option.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

when I went to conferences my employer paid for travel but I paid for an extra seat. That said I once had to fly on short notice and ticket too expensive so I just went with one seat and airline did not say anything. was well over 300 at the time, I think that was American.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone for the replies, I will be booking my flight to Chicago today for Sept 20 - 23. I"m on vacation starting tomorrow and I'm scheduled to return to work from vacation on the 20th. I'll be making my flight arrangements myself and hope a seat belt externder will be all I need (keeping my fingers crossed). If I have to purchase an extra seat I will pay for that on my own with my personal credit card. I just wasn't sure if I can use a different card then my corporate card to purchase the extra seat if needed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Crump13,

I see you've already got some great advice and decided how to handle things. I just wanted to chime in and say "Go you!"

I'm so grateful this surgery is out there to help us deal with our weight issues. I can't wait till you join us on the losers' bench and these worries are behind you.

Hope you have a great time at the conference.

Lynda

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Have your company pay for one seat and if the airline makes you pay for a second, pay for it yourself. But if you can buckle yourself in with an extender, do it. Maybe fly during an off-time so the flight isn't full and the chances the airline will charge you are lower.

Don't talk about personal matters with the boss's boss. He thinks you are the person for the job. Get that promotion!

THIS. x 1000. Don't even appear to be the slightest bit concerned over flying up there. If something happens at the airport and they make you get a second seat (I REALLY doubt it!!), then take care of it yourself, privately. And I would so NOT talk to the boss or their boss about it at. all. No personal conversations like that -- seriously, just don't. I can't say it strongly enough.

Remember: Never let 'em see you sweat. GOOD LUCK!!! smile.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks again for the great advice everyone :-)

@MeMeMEEE: I did some research and the seats range from 17"-18" (either of these are a tight fit) and I found a sight that provided which airlines used the 18" seats and I booked my flight with those. I'm flying American to Chicago and United home. I'm planning to arrive at the airport early to see if I can do an upgrade to business class and pick up that expense myself, if it is available.

Thanks for all the words of encouragement. This is going to be a long journey for me and I keep telling myself that this time next year I will be much lighter and hope to be 7-8 months post op.

I have been reading this message board every opportunity I have had since I made my decision for the sleeve (I was originally considering the lap band but after more research I decided on the sleeve) and there is a lot of folks sharing their success stories. I was surprised at how much weight folks are losing in the first year. All of these stories and post keep me motivated!! :-)

Thank you,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×