Scheduled losing? And awful compliments

[Nicole W 0]

So, anyone else heard the compliment "Oh, you're so pretty- even though you're bigger" ? I mean COME ON! 61 lbs gone and those types of bittersweet comments are still being made. I mean, of course- the people that say them ALWAYS mean well, i mean, love them to death.. but it's just something that's hard to hear- since my weight has always been a huge insecurity. I know I'm not the only one that's ever heard something like this right? Anyway, I guess I should be more thankful about it. After all, this compliment wont be a problem for too much longer.

Anyway, my question is- I've generally been losing anywhere from 2-4 lbs a week, averaging about 10-12 a month. I'm 10 weeks post op, and the rest I lost before surgery. Is this about on schedule? I feel like other people are losing quicker, but maybe I just feel as if I'm going so slow because I want it all off...?

[Tiffykins 673]

I always heard "you have such a pretty face", "if you'd lose a few pounds you'd be gorgeous instead of just pretty". . .

As for your loss, that's the average for sleeve patients.

[fairyfaye 9]

I hate it when People say stuff like that, I mean how dear they! Bigger people don't say ' your so pretty shame you look like you need a bloody good dinner' !

People are beautiful just they way they are, being over weight does not make you ugly! Ahhhh rant over. Lol

I think you are doing brilliantly with the weight loss, 10lb a month is fab!

Keep working your sleeve!

X  x

[Nicole W 0]

Okay, hearing that 10 a month is good relieves me. And yes, I know. its such a common compliment. Keeping in mind that they meant well, and letting it go- I should just be proud of my loss rather than worried about anyone else.

[Rootman 1,101]

Well I risk censure on the board and say that you both are pretty foxy ladies, if I were younger and single . . .

[coops 1,790]

Nicole, I completely understand the bitter sweet compliment thing... recently I had a comment that went 'God, look at you... and you're wearing making and nail varnish now!' WHAT!!! I have ALWAYS done that... infact I am wearing less make up the smaller I get!! People see that I am losing weight and I feel that they are looking at me in a different way... good or bad? I don't know, but they are taking more notice of my appearance! I used to get an odd comment, but it is on a weekly basis now. Like you, I believe they mean no harm, and they probably think that they are being kind... I suppose it is how we internalise it these comments... what might effect one may have no difference on another? Yes, the insecurity of carry weight is still with me too...

As far as your weight loss goes, I think you are doing yourself proud ... keep up the good work! =]

Oh and you are beautiful, regardless of what the scale says!!

[JourneyOfAFatKid 6]

I too constantly get, "you have such a pretty face" I HATE THAT! Why cant I just be PRETTY? Sheesh!

I feel your pain, girl. I can't wait to get my sleeve and show em all!

[thinoneday 445]

Wait until your OB/GYN sees you for the first time after the weight loss and goes on like a fool about how "Great" you look . . then does the exam and asks you "oh, how long have you had this??? " and you say to him "about 30 years or so" and he says "funny, I never saw that before" I just said "Well doc' maybe I was way too fat before for you to even notice". . . . . ugh

[Wheetsin 714]

Before I was FAT fat, a guy once told me he really wanted to go out with me, but I was chunkier than his type. He said, "You're awesome, and I really want to get to know you better, I REALLY do...I have for a long time... if you lose 30 lbs." Euh? (I was wearing a 14 at the time... I'm just under 5'11. I have no recollection of what I weighed then, but I never considered myself too fat as a 14).

I've gotten the "pretty face." I've gotten a few, "...if only you were built differently." I've had people see a picture that's obviously me, just me before I was fat, and say "THAT CAN'T BE YOU OMMIGOD THAT DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE YOU YOU LOOK SO NORMAL THERE!!!"

I'm pale, red hair, hazel eyes. When Titanic first came out - I can't tell you how many people would say, "OMMIGOD you look just like Kate Winslet except... [awkward silence, glancing over my body]...yeah..." (Except "fatter" clearly being the unspoken part). Except I look nothing like her so I'm not even sure where people were headed with that.

Once, at an OBGYN consultation for birth control (I wasn't tolerating BCP and wanted to see what else was viable) with my husband, the nurse who weighed me escorted us back to the room, then looked at me & my husband, patted me on the arm, and said, "Good for you, you found a very handsome man who loves you for who you are and not what you look like." Ok...?

[emilygrace 5]

Oh my god, I might have slapped her! So unprofessional!

[Amanda131 214]

Once, at an OBGYN consultation for birth control (I wasn't tolerating BCP and wanted to see what else was viable) with my husband, the nurse who weighed me escorted us back to the room, then looked at me & my husband, patted me on the arm, and said, "Good for you, you found a very handsome man who loves you for who you are and not what you look like." Ok...?

Words escape me. Just wow. WOW.

[wishes 125]

I hate that so much. I just wanna...... do something violent!

[ybnormal 21]

I too constantly get, "you have such a pretty face" I HATE THAT! Why cant I just be PRETTY? Sheesh!

I feel your pain, girl. I can't wait to get my sleeve and show em all!

This is the same thing I get and it irritates the piss outta me.

[coops 1,790]

Before I was FAT fat, a guy once told me he really wanted to go out with me, but I was chunkier than his type. He said, "You're awesome, and I really want to get to know you better, I REALLY do...I have for a long time... if you lose 30 lbs." Euh? (I was wearing a 14 at the time... I'm just under 5'11. I have no recollection of what I weighed then, but I never considered myself too fat as a 14).

I've gotten the "pretty face." I've gotten a few, "...if only you were built differently." I've had people see a picture that's obviously me, just me before I was fat, and say "THAT CAN'T BE YOU OMMIGOD THAT DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE YOU YOU LOOK SO NORMAL THERE!!!"

I'm pale, red hair, hazel eyes. When Titanic first came out - I can't tell you how many people would say, "OMMIGOD you look just like Kate Winslet except... [awkward silence, glancing over my body]...yeah..." (Except "fatter" clearly being the unspoken part). Except I look nothing like her so I'm not even sure where people were headed with that.

Once, at an OBGYN consultation for birth control (I wasn't tolerating BCP and wanted to see what else was viable) with my husband, the nurse who weighed me escorted us back to the room, then looked at me & my husband, patted me on the arm, and said, "Good for you, you found a very handsome man who loves you for who you are and not what you look like." Ok...?

OMG... where do I start... who the hell do people think they are...FFS!!!

This has really riled me up... I can't tolerate this sort of judmental bull ****!

I'll go out with you if you lose 30lb... huh? I'll go out with you when I am DEAD!!

You look so NORMAL... seriously, so with a little extra weight we look ABNORMAL!!

A man who love you for who you are and not what you look like... I can't even put into words how I feel about that!

Wheetsin, those comments are truly vile... and I can't imagine any of the offenders being 'perfect'... why oh why do people think they have the right to be so rude!!

I really am sorry that those words were said to you... as far as I am concerned,, they can all JOG ON!!

[treequeen 13]

I love (sarcasm) when ppl say you look like a famous person... I always got Nicole Kidman probably because of my curly hair.. and my response was always "Ya I look like I ATE Nicole Kidman...or If she was fat!" I figured it might make them uncomfortable if I finished their thought.

That pretty face thing has been the bain of my exisitence since I was a little girl. And If one more doctor tells me I'm fat...as if I don't know... especially since all they have on the walls to look at are obesity charts....or says my weight is the reason for whatever I came in for no matter what it is....Well.. there is no telling what I might say...

People suck... Professionals who should know better suck even more!