I am an emotional wreck. As I am closing out my final week at work (my last day is Friday) and preparing myself for surgery on Monday, March 15, I am growing increasingly scared of the operation. I don?t think I am afraid of dying in and of itself; my biggest fear is leaving my daughter without a mother. I am a single mom and I know that no one is going to love and take care of her the way I will. This is the main thing that is really bothering me. I am tearing up thinking about it right now. I love my baby more than anything in this world and now I have been questioning the reasons I am doing this. At first I told myself that I am doing it to add years on to my life and to be around longer for my daughter. To get off of high blood pressure and high cholesterol medications. To be more active with her. Can?t I do all of this without risky surgery? Am I taking the easy way out?

I am just so scared of leaving my daughter motherless I don?t know what to do.

I am an emotional wreck. As I am closing out my final week at work (my last day is Friday) and preparing myself for surgery on Monday, March 15, I am growing increasingly scared of the operation. I don’t think I am afraid of dying in and of itself; my biggest fear is leaving my daughter without a mother. I am a single mom and I know that no one is going to love and take care of her the way I will. This is the main thing that is really bothering me. I am tearing up thinking about it right now. I love my baby more than anything in this world and now I have been questioning the reasons I am doing this. At first I told myself that I am doing it to add years on to my life and to be around longer for my daughter. To get off of high blood pressure and high cholesterol medications. To be more active with her. Can’t I do all of this without risky surgery? Am I taking the easy way out?

I am just so scared of leaving my daughter motherless I don’t know what to do.

Every one goes through fears, it's not unusual. For "Me" this surgery was SOOOO easy. If you think about it, all surgeries are dangerous. Having a child is dangerous. We could all die at any moment of our lives, crossing the street, driving to work. Obesity is another form of slow death. Everything about this surgery will improve your life 10 fold. Sure the first month is hard, but so is the first month after having a child, or the first month of a new job, or the first month of a new school. Or the first month of marriage or anything new or different. Question is, do you have the courage to take the chance to save you life! Don't be afraid, think of the possitive effects. Think of how you'll feel when you look in the mirror and love what you see. I'm 100 days out, and I"ve lost 45 lbs. I'm in size 16, I go to the Gym 3 days a week. And I feel better than I've felt in 15 years, not only physically, but how I feel about "myself".

Everything will be alright. Surgery is fast and will be over before you know it. And you'll think back on this and think "what was I so scared of?".

Stop thinking the worst....think the best.....!!!!!! Hang in there girl.

I am an emotional wreck. As I am closing out my final week at work (my last day is Friday) and preparing myself for surgery on Monday, March 15, I am growing increasingly scared of the operation. I don?t think I am afraid of dying in and of itself; my biggest fear is leaving my daughter without a mother. I am a single mom and I know that no one is going to love and take care of her the way I will. This is the main thing that is really bothering me. I am tearing up thinking about it right now. I love my baby more than anything in this world and now I have been questioning the reasons I am doing this. At first I told myself that I am doing it to add years on to my life and to be around longer for my daughter. To get off of high blood pressure and high cholesterol medications. To be more active with her. Can?t I do all of this without risky surgery? Am I taking the easy way out?

I am just so scared of leaving my daughter motherless I don?t know what to do.

Girl you have more chances of dying remaining obese then this surgery! What can i say . . . if you really don't trust your physician then maybe you shouldn't have this surgery. . . i have had 18 major surgeries and have never once thought i would die and leave my family, i trust my surgeon and the Lord in pulling me through each and every one of them. . . you have to rely on your faith and your surgeon. . . it's normal to be afraid, but to think your going to die????? that is bizzare. . . sorry if i sound prickly and mean, i don't mean to but it's the truth. . . good luck, you're going to be ok. . . you'll do well and be there on the loser bench with us next week. . .

Girl you have more chances of dying remaining obese then this surgery! What can i say . . . if you really don't trust your physician then maybe you shouldn't have this surgery. . . i have had 18 major surgeries and have never once thought i would die and leave my family, i trust my surgeon and the Lord in pulling me through each and every one of them. . . you have to rely on your faith and your surgeon. . . it's normal to be afraid, but to think your going to die????? that is bizzare. . . sorry if i sound prickly and mean, i don't mean to but it's the truth. . . good luck, you're going to be ok. . . you'll do well and be there on the loser bench with us next week. . .

Thanks for the encouragement, thinoneday. I wouldn't call my fears bizzare. In fact according to three pages of this thread, lots of soon to be sleevers and some vets have ane are currently going throught the same emotional rollercoster as I. 18 major surguries makes youmpretty experienced with being put under. For some of us this is the first time.

Every one goes through fears, it's not unusual. For "Me" this surgery was SOOOO easy. If you think about it, all surgeries are dangerous. Having a child is dangerous. We could all die at any moment of our lives, crossing the street, driving to work. Obesity is another form of slow death. Everything about this surgery will improve your life 10 fold. Sure the first month is hard, but so is the first month after having a child, or the first month of a new job, or the first month of a new school. Or the first month of marriage or anything new or different. Question is, do you have the courage to take the chance to save you life! Don't be afraid, think of the possitive effects. Think of how you'll feel when you look in the mirror and love what you see. I'm 100 days out, and I"ve lost 45 lbs. I'm in size I16, I go to the Gym 3 days a week. And I feel better than I've felt in 15 years, not only physically, but how I feel about "myself".

Everything will be alright. Surgery is fast and will be over before you know it. And you'll think back on this and think "what was I so scared of?".

Stop thinking the worst....think the best.....!!!!!! Hang in there girl.

Question is, do you have the courage to take the chance to save you life

this one sentence is so poweful! Thanks for helping me see things from a different perspective.

Amen Judy!

Hi

I'm having the gastric sleeve on March 15th too!! I'm also a nervous wreck! I have 3 children and a wonderful husband and I'm letting my emotions get away from me. I am really nervous in hospitals and just wish it would be over! I'm assuming that our last minute jitters are normal. Monday will be here soon. Hang in there. It is nice to know I'm no the only one.

:confused:

Wow! What a great blog. I too was supposed to have surgery on Monday the 15th, but decided to postpone the surgery until May. My main concern was leaving my 15 month old motherless also. I think when it gets closer to your surgery, all the awful thoughts come flooding in, but you got to have faith! Good luck to you, hope to see you on the losers bench in May.

Hi

I'm having the gastric sleeve on March 15th too!! I'm also a nervous wreck! I have 3 children and a wonderful husband and I'm letting my emotions get away from me. I am really nervous in hospitals and just wish it would be over! I'm assuming that our last minute jitters are normal. Monday will be here soon. Hang in there. It is nice to know I'm no the only one.

fabfive, you are most defibitley NOT the only one. Appeerently lots of others are feeling the last minute jitters just lime us.

My op is scheduled fo 11:30 Monday AM. What time is yours?

To all who have posted, I had all these same feelings right before my surgery 3/3. Thanks so much, it is so good to know I was not alone in my panic!!

Ladies,

Please trust your decision. Know that you will be so happy post-op. I am three weeks out and wearing clothing that I haven't worn in 3 or 4 years. I move more easily. I'm so much happier. The obsession with food has passed. I am not hungry between meals. I drink tea and Water as I did before surgery. My visit to my surgeon yesterday was perfect. He removed my label of Morbidly Obese.

Have trust in your surgeon. The greatest odds are that you will survive the surgery and flourish and your children will be so much the happier for it. If you do not trust your surgeon, find someone that you do trust. In the week before my surgery I had only calm and delight at the upcoming event because I trusted that I was in the best possible hands and that my surgeon would not let anything happen to me.

Find your peace and hold onto it. Visualize yourself as you would like to see yourself in a month. Down on the floor playing happily with your children perhaps? I am happy to take any PM's if you would like to give over your fears. I will hold them until after your surgery and return them to you afterwards if you want them back.

My mantra preop was "everything always works out for me... everything always works out for me". Visualize the best possible outcome and keep it close to you.

Brenda,

I loved every word of your post. I know that you think that your journey is just beginning and I can relate to that, but I think it's our journey thus far that has brought us to this place. You're going to be just fine!

Thanks very much Lee!!! I am hanging on to many of your post as you have been insightful and motivating to me. Hopefully, I can one day be like you and continue to motivate others!. I will certainly keep you updated on my progress.

Breeka and Stuck,

I will be thinking of both you this week as you undergo your surgeries. We all have the same fear especially when its elective and if you have kids but we also can only hope that we are doing the right thing for our families by becoming healthier. My son is 18 now but I still had the same fears. There still your baby no matter what age they are. Please keep us updated as to how you are doing.

hi ladies! the days are winding down. i can honestl say that i am feeling so much more confident in my decision.almost not worried at all and its thans to theprayers , thoughts and experiences that the members iof this forum have been so generous

to share.

Thanks very much Lee!!! I am hanging on to many of your post as you have been insightful and motivating to me. Hopefully, I can one day be like you and continue to motivate others!. I will certainly keep you updated on my progress.

Brenda, I consider this a very very big compliment. Thank you for your kind words. Around here, we look to those ahead of us on the path and learn from their process. I know that you will be there for those that follow in your footsteps. This is a wonderful "pay it forward" kind of place and I've been learning from the best!

When I had a tumor in my colon removed 6 years ago, I remember reading a passage in the Bible in the Book of James, my sister urged me to read it. It said: For God does not give me a spirit of fear, but of faith, joy and sound mind. Fear therefore is not of God.

Keep a positive attitude, God takes us to the things he wants for us, and you are in good hands. Walk in faith and confidence!

Jen:smile1: