Courage to not feel embarrassed I failed.

[mrsto 2,925]

What did it for me was figuring out that I could have won an award for best supporting actress in my own life story. I was sitting on the sidelines waiting to live until after I lost the weight. Waiting to like myself, waiting to open myself up for risk, waiting, waiting, waiting. Once I decided to star in my own life, things started to move fast. It's a terrifying and exhilarating ride!

Shelly - it's like you quoted my life story. It was that way for all of my years, up until I lost 90 pounds 14 years ago. After that, I opened up and found my life. I still have a sh-tload of hangups, but my life is good......weight and all. Now, I just need to deal with the demons. At close to 58 years old, I honestly think that most of them are here to stay

Thanks for you post - loved it!!

[2muchfun 8,928]

Just so you know - I am a therapist and I still struggle. I know all about healthy coping skills, emotional eating, self-sabotage - all of it. I have a doctorate in this stuff - a PsyD. Please, please, please don't beat yourself up. It's not a matter of personal shortcomings!

Clearly, I believe in the benefits of therapy or I wouldn't do what I do for a living. Continue with your therapist and keep working. Just know that there is more to it than head knowledge and "willpower." If you managed to get the surgery in the first place, you have more "willpower" than 90% of the general population. Most people I know who have even considered weight loss surgery are experts on diet and nutrition. We know what we're supposed to do. We just have to figure out what gets in the way. What did it for me was figuring out that I could have won an award for best supporting actress in my own life story. I was sitting on the sidelines waiting to live until after I lost the weight. Waiting to like myself, waiting to open myself up for risk, waiting, waiting, waiting. Once I decided to star in my own life, things started to move fast. It's a terrifying and exhilarating ride!

Hang in there! If you have come this far, you can do anything!

Shelly

OK, you need to check in here more often. We need more posts like yours!! :wub:

[BeautyLocs40 16]

Thanks to all of you for sharing your stories. The similarities remind me that I'm not alone.

[labwalker 1,177]

When the dust settles you are down to 278 from 330! That is a major weight loss in itself. Don't worry about Water over the damn. I see you are getting back on track with your surgeon. It is never too late!

[Ninejuan1 28]

Hello all my friends on this thread! I DID IT!!!! I WENT IN TO SEE A NEW DOCTOR!!!!! Yesterday i went in with my tail between my legs and sat down in front of a new Lap band Doctor. (Dr. Woody Denhem.) His weight loss nurse came in and told me " she was happy to see i came in to get fixed!" MY WEIGHT TODAY 384 lbs After a few questions on my history Dr. Woody came in. He was able to fill me on the spot.

: Rules were liquid diet for 2 days and slowly start back to solids.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement! For those who felt like me, PICK UP THE PHONE AND CALL NOW!!!!! you will feel what I feel!!! Lets do this together!!!!

SO MY JOURNEY CONTINUES!!!

[taylor1989 131]

Hello all my friends on this thread! I DID IT!!!! I WENT IN TO SEE A NEW DOCTOR!!!!! Yesterday i went in with my tail between my legs and sat down in front of a new Lap band Doctor. (Dr. Woody Denhem.) His weight loss nurse came in and told me " she was happy to see i came in to get fixed!" MY WEIGHT TODAY 384 lbs After a few questions on my history Dr. Woody came in. He was able to fill me on the spot.

: Rules were liquid diet for 2 days and slowly start back to solids.

Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement! For those who felt like me' date=' PICK UP THE PHONE AND CALL NOW!!!!! you will feel what I feel!!! Lets do this together!!!!

SO MY JOURNEY CONTINUES!!![/quote']

Awesome job and congrats in getting back on track

[abraxasbear 16]

CONGRATS, Ninejuan1, on getting set up with a new doctor and back on track!

I'm afraid my own "return to the office" has turned out a little different, but it's important that I went. The doctor withdrew Fluid to make sure my band wasn't leaking, and I immediately had a sharp, burning pain traveling up my esophagus. That's not supposed to happen, so they set me up for an upper GI. The upper GI led to an endoscopy this past Wednesday. It turns out that my pouch is seriously dilated, and my band needs to be removed. I go in next Tuesday, and presumably will schedule surgery ASAP. It's a serious issue, and needs to be taken care of---it's good that I didn't continue to shy away from the office due to my embarassment, etc.

Things will work out okay. The doctor would like to revise me to a gastric bypass, but I think I'm going to try some other approaches before getting another WLS.

[Ninejuan1 28]

Abraxsbear - Sorry to hear that brother. I hope everything comes out ok.

[dawalsh 919]

Alexbear my thoughts and prayers are with you. Good luck.

[Ladybandito 516]

This is a really good thread. (bump)