Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

It's None Of Your Business!



Recommended Posts

Ive talked to people who told everyone, some few people, and no one. Do what feels right - as long as YOU are supported. Also, even though the medical procedure is short, the recovery may not be. Just follow your gut!

-Cordelia, banded 1/08

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've told some and some I haven't. I have been vigorously eating healthy and exercising since march and have lost 18 lbs. surgery is August 15.

I've had support from some and other give me the "Why? Your not THAT big!" I'm so over people's opinions. That Ive stopped telling people. Its my decision , I've made it, I'll deal with it. It had nothing to do with them. Period.

I'm doing this for me, my health and my family. They're all that counts. Once I realized I love myself and the rest will fall in place- I've felt wonderful:))good luck to you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told next to no one the specifics of my surgery. I told my work I was having surgery and left it at that. For people who asked what I had surgery on, I said my stomach and no one pushed any further! I chose to keep it private because I didn't want to hear anyone's opinions. I didn't want people to ask me how things were going, because if they weren't going well I knew I wouldn't want to talk about it! I didn't want people talking about me and my decision to have surgery and my successes/failures behind my back. I had the surgery for me and it was no one else's business! Once my weight loss became noticeable, people began asking how I was doing it, and mostly I would say small portions, high Protein, low sugar and exercise! Now that I have been quite successful, I'm more comfortable with sharing, but I am glad that I kept it so private in the early days!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am the same, I am self employed so when I left I told my assistant what I was doing, but that was it. I was only gone three days, and came back to work on day 4, (which I think you should take more time if you can).

I told some friends, and I was always disappointed that they didn't care about my privacy. They said they won't say anything, but they of course, tell their husbands, sisters, mothers, and swear them to privacy too. And we all know how well that works. I sat at dinner with a friend and her mother, and her mother kept STARING at me, and finally she said, well I am just trying to figure out how your band thing works. I was HUMILIATED..

After i lost 100 pounds, I was literally cornered by some women that I knew at a business event asking me how I did it. I said extremely restricted potion size, calories counting, and exercise, which literally is what I am doing, but one lady said, I don't believe it, tell us! It was like a sitcom. I lived in a very small gossipy town. LOL Really it reminded me of being the fat kid in high school again when one of the most popular things was to ask me how much I weighed....

I have since moved. Not for that reason, but that part is a huge relief. My reasons for not telling is yes, I was ashamed that I had let myself get that big, and ashamed that I need something like surgery to control it, and terrified that it wouldn't work. That is just me. It's a personal decision.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

BTW, I have been considering revising my band to a gastric sleeve, and was going through the same process in my head again. If I do this, if I have to tell anyone, which would only be a select few, that I am having gall bladder surgery. It's a simple short operation... it's a little white lie, but I don't want to have to go through the social issue again. I have anxiety issues, it's my body nobody needs to know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

BTW' date=' I have been considering revising my band to a gastric sleeve, and was going through the same process in my head again. If I do this, if I have to tell anyone, which would only be a select few, that I am having gall bladder surgery. It's a simple short operation... it's a little white lie, but I don't want to have to go through the social issue again. I have anxiety issues, it's my body nobody needs to know.[/quote']

Why are you thinking about the sleeve? My boss did it and she is doing great. It seems very similar to the band process.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well from what I have been reading people are supposed to be having a lot of success with it. i have been banded since 2006 and have lost over 100 pounds, then started gaining back after a health crisis and being at the wrong fill level for a long time. I feel like because I had so much to lose, and still do have to lose, that the sleeve might be a better choice for me. I chose the band strictly because I was self pay and had it done in Mexico and it was affordable. From what I am reading the sleeve can be more effective than the band for some people. Just looking at options as I never reached my goal, and am somewhat frustrated and discouraged right now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have one friend who also had it done and my husband that is it, who knows, oh and my boss, but he gets all flustered and shy so I am safe..but for me, like you I am a private person, and I dont want to share some of this, its my personal journey, and always will be..

good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wow I'm so glad I stumbled into this thread. I have been debating telling anyone about this decision. Truthfully, most people I know do not understand WLS surgery. They do not understand that it's JUST A TOOL. They think it's magic, and i'm scared that when I don't lose weight fast they will look at me as a complete failure. I understand the work that comes with losing weight with the band. I understand that the weight comes off (sometimes painfully) slowly. I understand that it's not a miracle cure for obesity. My friends/family unfortunately do not understand. Case in point: My mom went with me to my final doc appointment before surgery and he explained that in the beginning i probably won't lose much weight until i heal and am properly adjusted. As we left the office my mom whispered "he's just trying to downplay the weight loss. I know you're gonna lose 50 lbs before october"

WTF!!!

My dad is the same way. He keeps saying I will loose 100 lbs in 8 months. These people are dreaming. For this reason I know that no matter what I accomplish I will look like a failure in their eyes because i'm (fairly) certain that I will never live up to their expectations. That's why the less people that know the better. I can't be a failure to my friends too

yes it's very sad that I won't be getting proper support from my parents but I guess i'll just have to be strong and never feel like a complete failure

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told my job that I was going in for same day surgery to have a hernia repaired. I feel exactly as you do. It's no ones business until you want to make it their business. Good luck and don't be nervous, it's a piece of cake!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      Just for fun last week, I ran two 5Ks in two days, something I would have never done in the past! Next goal is a 10K before the end of this month.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Teriesa

      Hi everyone, I wrote back in May about having no strength. I still get totally exhausted just walking from room to room, it’s so bad I’m using a walker with wheels of all things. I had the gastric sleeve Jan. 24th. I’m doing exactly what the programs says, except protein shakes. I have different meats and protein bars daily, including vitamins daily. I do drink my fluids as well.  I go in for IV hydration 4 days a week and feel ok just til evening.  So far as of Jan 1st I’ve dropped 76 lbs. I just want to enjoy the weight lose. Any suggestions or has anyone else gone thru this??  Doctor says just increase calorie intake, still the same. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Stone Art By SKL

      Decorative Wall Cladding & Panels | Stone Art By SKL
      Elevate your space with Stone Art By SKL's decorative wall claddings & panels. Explore premium designs for timeless elegance.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Losing my hair in clumps and still dealing with "stomach" issues from gallbladder removal surgery. On the positive side I'm doing better about meeting protein and water goals and taking my vitamins, so yay? 🤷‍♀️
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      · 1 reply
      1. BabySpoons

        Amazing! Congrats!!! Watch out for the sharks. 🦈

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×