Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Big mouths at work



Recommended Posts

I would like an opinion on this I told two people at work about my lap band surgery. Another girl at the same time got gastric bypass she told everyone I told the girls I told not to tell. My husband seen another girl from my work and told her I had the surgery that girl asked another girl that we are mutually close to at work is it true she said yes and she wants to keep it quiet. Now that I am losing weight people are asking how. why ,you know the drill. well apparently one of the girls told another girl and you get it rumors are rampant and I don't know how to react I don't want them to know it is none of their business but how do i dispell all the talk I am quite upset it is my business and my life and people should learn to keep their mouths shut please offer advice sorry for being so winded story is complicated thanks

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why not say exactly that?

Tell the rumor mill that this is your business and you see no reason to invite them into your private life.

The only other way possibility I see is to destroy the rumor mill by flat out saying "yes I have had the lap-band". Nothing kills gossip faster than flat our revealing the truth.

People will dress it up as being caring, showing concern, being a friend. The fact is, is that it is just downright nosey.

I am so sorry you are faced with this conundrum.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I took the mantra that I want to make a difference in my life...I spent the cash, I went to Mexico..and in 7 month have lost 63 pounds. Like a recovering alcoholic, I enjoy sharing my story...plus it keeps me accountable. It sucks that your confidence has been betrayed, like dealing with little kids, only give a simple answer that you are comfortable with. If people ask I usually say I had WLS surgery and I no longer eat much....usually they ask alot of questrions, or none at all...

The truth will set you free...and you should be proud that you are doing something that will improve your life....

You can do it!

Cristan

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

If anyone comesto you, just smile and say "I'd like to keep that private. No offense, but I just like to keep my medical stuff personal." If it gets bad, go to your manager. It really is no body's business.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Flower, I know this is not always what people want to do, and for their own good reasons. This is one way to handle it...just come clean. Tell everyone, and then there will not be any gossip. I think we're about split 50/50 on this topic...some want privacy, some just tell. I have experienced no negative responses at all...only warm and supportive encouragement. I may just be lucky to work with fantastic people (for the most part) and I've been here forever, so that might have something to do with it, too.

Good luck with your situation, whatever you decide to do!

Cindy

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

JMO, but I agree that flat out telling people should stop the gossip. Just say that I had this done and I would really not like to discuss it anymore.

My co-workers know that I had the surgery and they are very respectful of my privacy regarding it. Every once in a while someone will mention that I look good, or they can tell I have doing a good job and leave it at that. I work with a bunch of techno-geeks, so they wanted to know about the mechanics of it in the beginning but that was about it.

Good luck with whatever you decide. The bottom line is it really is no one's business but your own, and you shouldn't have to share that information if you don't want to.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I decided to keep my surgery completely private from co-workers. Only a small handful of my friends and family even know. I decided to keep it under wraps because I knew I would encounter saboteurs everywhere I go. Plus, so many people think they understand gastric bypass, but no one understands lap band. Even the people who do know about my surgery don't understand. They still try to push me to drink at meals and offer me more food than I can eat or things that are difficult for me. I'd rather keep it quiet than have to explain. It's never enough to say you've had a procedure that limits your food intake and slows down the rate at which food goes through your stomach. Just saying I had WLS is tough because, bottom line is, even though WE all know that it isn't a short cut or easy, others definitely do and can treat you differently because you chose the surgical route.

I have lost 45 lbs since November and sure co-workers are noticing and asking me how I have done it. I just tell the truth...I'm exercising, eating right and eating less!!!!! Nothing untruthful about that!

Good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think I would go directly to the people you spoke to and tell them that you told only them and that you told them to keep it quiet and you'd sure like to know why everyone is talking about your surgery now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×