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Date...help With Dinner Decision??

So I'm going on my first date with this guy I've been talking to for a few weeks and he has no idea I've had the band surgery. Right now I'm comfortable with eating and I know my limits quite well. However, I don't know what on earth to order! We're going to Friday's and I've looked over the menu and can't decide what to get that I can at least make it look like I'm not eating like a bird. I don't want him to think I'm another one of "those girls" that doesn't eat.

How did you deal with this?? I typically don't go to dinner with guys because of this and go out for coffee or a walk in the park...but he seems stuck on dinner...Please answer ASAP! This is tomorrow evening!

Thank you!

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  • I find risottos and pastas to be the safest dishes for me.

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  • Papillon Princess
    Papillon Princess

    Perfect night! I cut up my food really tiny and just kinda pushed it around and ate very slow and he wasn't very hungry. He didn't seem to pay any attention to what I ate. He asked me to go out again

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I take it you don't want him to know? I am usually pretty forthright about these things and say straight out that there are things I can't eat because I have had lapband surgery. But if you don't want to say that, then maybe only say that there are some things you just can't eat and leave it at that. If he questions it further, just say you had a big lunch and are not a big eater anyway, and maybe he'll let it go.

  • Author

Lellow, I don't tell people right up front. I make sure they're going to be around for a little bit first. I'm very proud of my band but haven't said anything on a first date or when first meeting someone. It takes me about 2 months or so to "feel out" others and decide if I'm ready to tell them.

Fair enough! I know telling someone is a personal decision, and I respect that you don't wish to trust someone with that sort of information straight off the bat.

My suggestion is to not make a big deal about the food. Honestly I dated extensively when I was single a few years back and rarely did anyone ask about why I was eating so little. If he does though, like I said, just brush it off lightly by saying you had a big lunch or that you're not a big eater.

I'd be surprised if he pressed you for more information after that!

You are going to have to learn to 'own' how you eat an dmake no excuses for it...I didnt tell anyone outside family I was banded and maybe some think I eat weird or tiny but I dont care...this is (now) just who you are and will ever be...enjoy being the new skinnier you!

To answer your question, its always safe to go with soup & salad combo. Almost everywhere has one and it LOOKS like a lot of food, but is still band friendly. Good luck on your date and keep us posted on how it goes!

To answer your question, its always safe to go with soup & salad combo. Almost everywhere has one and it LOOKS like a lot of food, but is still band friendly. Good luck on your date and keep us posted on how it goes!

I would go with this choice too :)

I find risottos and pastas to be the safest dishes for me.

I used to get some sort of appetizer, and if he asked I would just say "oh I had a big lunch" after that most guys don't say anything. I've been with my boyfriend for over a year he has no clue I had the procedure done, even brought me to an endoscopy for a possible band erosion and still no clue...he's clueless in general. LOL.

  • Author

Thanks everybody! It ended up being cancelled but we're going out tomorrow instead. (Worked out for both of us though). I'm still on a strict diet so very low carb and high Protein, small amount of veggies are fine which is why it's hard for me to find things and I'm picky which doesn't help the situation. (I don't like soup...) I appreciate the ideas and the encouragement everyone gave me :) I have no problem telling people but for some reason I'm weird about telling a potential boyfriend after having an insecure guy that kept saying I was going to leave him after losing more weight! I'm quite proud of my band and tell about anyone that will listen.

We'll see how it goes tomorrow!

I would order some fish and salad. Or go with an appetizer, as the op said. If he asks, say that you are dieting. You don't have to say that you have a band, unless you feel comfortable doing so! Good luck, Karen

I have been banded for over a year. My band "shifted" so I do not have the tightness I once enjoyed. (this is only for a few months) Anyway, obviously I am more hungry than usual. Anyone have any advice on eating bread (good stuff) or pasta? My doctor wants me to ban it but I really need more filling food right now.

My husband and I eat at Friday's a couple of times a month - they have a great grilled chicken and vegetable combo. And if you can't eat it all, just do what everyone recommended and say that you had a big lunch, or that you're taking the chicken home to your dog!

If you tell him you had a "big lunch" he may wonder why since you knew you had a dinner date. Good luck on your date!

I have been banded for over a year. My band "shifted" so I do not have the tightness I once enjoyed. (this is only for a few months) Anyway, obviously I am more hungry than usual. Anyone have any advice on eating bread (good stuff) or Pasta? My doctor wants me to ban it but I really need more filling food right now.

I think you would be better of eating more raw veggies or even fruit than bread or pasta.

Hi sue, when u say "shifted, what exactly do u mean? I'm getting banded 2/15 and I'm just trying to learn the "lingo"... :)

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