So today I had my pre surgery appt with the Dr. I was warned he had an extremely bad bed side manner but apparently didn't prepare myself like I should have! He was extremely harsh with his words and hurtful. Everything he said was all true statements though. I was very upset when I left, crying in fact, but now that I've had a little time to process things, I think he's that way partially for a reason. He wants to weed out the people that aren't taking this seriously! I've battled my weight my entire life and have gotten myself literally in a deep dark whole I don't know how to get out of. I am so ready for this journey. I'm ready to have my life back and "me" back.

He doesn't necessarily do a "liquid preop' diet, he says "lose 10 lbs". I have 3 weeks to do it. I know I can do it. And getting upset with him is actually good motivation!!!

^{I don't know if I would want to deal with a jerk for my surgery and all the follow up.}

^{My pre-op diet was 2 weeks of Atkins and I lost 8 pounds. If you did Atkins for 3 weeks 10 could be done.}

You are the patient/client/customer. Yes you need help but ultimately you are the one making the decision to get the surgery, go to all these appointments and following through with it etc., personally I don't care if my surgeon is my best friend or not I just want him/het to be good at what they do. But I also like motivating people in my corner. My husband in the other hand likes someone who tells it like it is. I don't mind honesty but I mind meanness. So you have to carefully decide whether to use him or not. Are you someone who gets motivated when you are challeneged the way he is challenging you? Then show Dr. Mean Butt that you can dot this. If you need someone more motivating and supportive then you need to find another surgeon. Do it now because you are early in the process that it won't delay your journey. Regardless I know we can do with the band, that's why I am on this journey. Believe and you will achieve.

I wasn't taking this as seriously as I should have been in the beginning of this process and while my doctor is very nice, his partner sees me every other appointment as well and she was pretty harsh with me and made me cry....I was upset because nobody told me I needed 6 months of DOCUMENTED appointments for my insurance, I had over a year of appointments but they were all spread out, so I had to start over with only 2 months documented(this was in July) Now I am all ready and it took that serious talk I had with her to make me just DO IT like I have been...I'm pretty sure.

She told me that I had to wait longer and not only that but to loose at least 50 pounds before I get it done, to know that I can handle it. I proved it to them and now they are ready to do the surgery ASAP, I'm just waiting on insurance. I started this at 329 and now I am 308!

Because honestly I had no motivation what so ever before then....so I think I owe her all of the credit. I have lost 21 pounds in about a 3 month period of time mostly by exercising and eating less. I'm very proud of myself and everybody can see that I lost the weight, makes me feel great and determined now to get the lap band and start this process. I can't wait for the liquid diet! I am GOING to be under 300 pounds before I get the lap band put in, that is a FACT. You will see

But anyway I totally understand what you are saying..because the same thing happened to me! You WILL do it just like I did- just remember to keep at it every single day and do NOT quit!

One of the things my Doctor told me about the pre-surgery weight loss is that is shrinks your liver. This is really important prior to the surgery and makes it go much easier. He put me on a restricted carb diet for three weeks, I lost 11 pounds and had no problems with the procedure. Best thing I have ever done for myself.

Best wishes for your surgery. I hope your experience with the lap band is as good as mine has been!

Doctors can be total assholes sometimes. I went in for my feet, I crawled to the bathroom at times.. holding on walls collapsing from pain. Its called ( plantar faciaitis..bruised heels and tight tendons...=feels like death ) had it most of my life.. didnt notice it really until i hit my 250+ mark... 300.. it killed me...

The doctor said... " Your fat, quit making excuses, and get off your butt and your feet will feel better. Wont kill you to get off the couch."...

wow. I was speechless. RUDE...Well he was right, but rude. but its there, permanently, for one. The severity worsens with weight. So , ok whatever. But dont be so damn mean about it.

Sometimes it takes the harsh things in life to wake u up.

I dont think that a doctor who makes you cry is a good surgeon after all he is part of your support system also. I would never go to anyone who talked to me like that because if it wasnt for his patients he would be a broke ass selling drugs on the street. I dont care how fat we are/were no one has the right to talk to us like that. Its not a motivator its them pushing their weight around because they have never had an issue with being obese. I would find another understanding doctor that had a bed side manner asap because in the long run everytime you dont lose a pound, screw up, dont do as much as they want when they want it they will make you feel like a failure I dont think so. Thats my opinion though I refuse to pay to be treated like a piece of crap when most of our lives we have been treated as such by people because we are/were overweight.

Thank you all very much for your comments. It's so nice to have found this website and be able to have support from people that actually "get it".

I know that the pre weight loss is mainly to shrink the liver. I really don't have a problem with him wanting the weight loss before surgery.

There's really no other surgeon in my area to go to, unfortunately. I am so close and I'm not gonna let him make me feel bad. I am doing this for me and plan on having as little contact with him as possible. The good thing is his staff is supportive. All of the nurses except one have had bariatric surgery so they've been in my shoes.

I was talking to my Mom last night and she said people that haven't ever been in our shoes don't have a clue about being over weight. For me, it's been something I've struggled with my entire life. My Dr.'s office supposedly has a support group that meets monthly. I've thought about maybe meeting with them.

Thanks again for all the kind words. Looking forward to the next phase of this journey!!!

Thank you all very much for your comments. It's so nice to have found this website and be able to have support from people that actually "get it".

I know that the pre weight loss is mainly to shrink the liver. I really don't have a problem with him wanting the weight loss before surgery.

There's really no other surgeon in my area to go to, unfortunately. I am so close and I'm not gonna let him make me feel bad. I am doing this for me and plan on having as little contact with him as possible. The good thing is his staff is supportive. All of the nurses except one have had bariatric surgery so they've been in my shoes.

I was talking to my Mom last night and she said people that haven't ever been in our shoes don't have a clue about being over weight. For me, it's been something I've struggled with my entire life. My Dr.'s office supposedly has a support group that meets monthly. I've thought about maybe meeting with them.

Thanks again for all the kind words. Looking forward to the next phase of this journey!!!

Your Mom is so right. It is also very hard to try to explain to someone why you need to do this.

Im sorry your dr was a jerk . I have to say I got very lucky with mine . Just that Ive been having a hard time with my band . I had my surgery done the 2cd and its now the 9th . I had to go back in and have it unsnapped bcuz the swelling was out of control and the pain was an issue . I hope things go well for you .. I think i drank to much today . I feel like I have a brick in my throat .. Hope all is well

My question is: If you lose 9 lbs, is the surgery off? Do you have 3 weeks to lose 10 lbs? Or do you have to lose 10 lbs before he will do the surgery? Or do you have 3 weeks to follow the pre-op and he'd -like- you to lose 10 lbs, but any loss is good?

Setting 'x' amount of pounds to lose in 'x' amount of time is recipe for failure in my book.

Being blunt is one thing, being a jerk is another.

Find a new doc...he sounds like he hates fat people or maybe just people. Those are the docs that later on a really stingy and harsh about giving you afill. It seems like they withhold fills to be a punshment...run!

My surgeon is very matter of fact and I love him for it really. He doesn't mix his words, I know exactly what he expects and it motivates me to want to do the best I can. He is like my Jimminy Cricket. The voice in my head that says "I will kick your a$$ if you even think of cheating." But I like that. His office workers even said, we will be your biggest cheerleaders and the biggest foot up your butt in this process. I believe them and I am on board. Good luck and you will do great.

By the way, I am doing my surgeons 14 day pre-op diet of Optifast 800 shakes 6 x a day (1 every 2 hours) and sugar free Jello, broth, sugar free popsicles, sugar free gum (if you just gotta chew), black coffee, unsweetened tea, Crystal light and sugar free lemonade and in 3 days I have lost 5 pounds.

Take care,

Jen

Thanks all for the comments. I'm actually going to a different surgeon. I don't need a bully, I need a Dr. I'm so happy with my new surgeon. Doing the 2 week liquid diet right now and it's not been bad because I've got a cold so don't feel like eating anyways. lucky me! Surgery scheduled Dec. 21st. So ready for the next chapter of life!!!

Wow, you found another surgeon just like that? I thought there wasn't any in your area?

Thanks all for the comments. I'm actually going to a different surgeon. I don't need a bully, I need a Dr. I'm so happy with my new surgeon. Doing the 2 week liquid diet right now and it's not been bad because I've got a cold so don't feel like eating anyways. lucky me! Surgery scheduled Dec. 21st. So ready for the next chapter of life!!!

I'm glad you found a different surgeon. You really don't need one that makes you feel bad. The 21st will be here very fast! Best wishes on your journey!