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I Am Unhappy...not With The Lap Band, But With Myself



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Hi all,

I am new to the forum. I had my surgery in April of 2011. My starting weight was 330 lbs. Currently I am hovering between 288 - 292 on a daily basis. I feel that I should have lost more weight than I have. I know that my food choices are not the best, however, my mindset was that the sheer cut in the amount of food that I take in would have allowed me to lose more weight. I am still kind of naive as to what I am supposed to feel when I eat (even though my wife had the band also and did well) or what I am supposed to feel when I am satisfied. I really need some input from some outsiders or some advice from those who have gone through the same thing that I am currently going through. Am I being too ambitious or am I right in feeling like I am beginning to fail?

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You are only going to fail if you allow yourself to have those negative thoughts and let yourself fail. I was banded exactly 4 months ago today and have lost 45 pounds so far. I eat under 1200 calories a day, mostly low fat stuff. I go to the gym until I burn 300-400 calories then I go home. I allow myself to cheat some times which is one reason I think the weight is coming off still. I had hit some plateaus for a week or 2 here and there but for the most part, you've got to stay strong minded and make it through that. Tell yourself you will not let yourself fail. Usually men lose quicker and faster. So I believe you need to make better food choices. As far as what you feel, you should feel satisfied after eating. Sometimes I can eat a cup of pudding and feel satisfied. I no longer live to eat, I eat to live. Keep that mind frame going and the weight will come off.

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First thing I'm wondering is how big is your band and how much Fluid is in it? I have a 14cc band and never really felt the satisfied feeling until I had around 10.5 cc in it. It took me a long time and a lot of adjustments to get to the correct point. I generally try to eat everything the right way. Of course I have periods of time where I fail at that. I know for a fact that if I eat heavy healthy- Protein rich foods- chicken, beef, or fish I eat around 9-14 oz for that entire meal. now if I eat garbage- slippery greasy food I can eat a lot. From my own experience I had to be filled properly before the band made a difference. Talk to your doc and tell them your concerns. You might need adjustments.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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