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The spoon theory



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The spoon theory is what one woman came up with to describe what it's like living with Lupis. http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/2004/11/the_spoon_theory.php I don't have Lupis, but I do have cronic fatague. I sort of thought everyone one felt like this, that they had a limited amount of things they could accomplish in a day. Her theory broght me to tears, I guess mainly because she is telling my story on one level.

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Thanks for that, Crystal.

My grandmother has lupus .. was just diagnosed year before last. Its hereditary so its something I have worried about more than once. That story definitely has me understanding more what her life must be like ...

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Interesting site. Thanks for sharing. I was diagnosed with Lupus at the age of 23. My daughter was 2 yrs old and they basically told me I MIGHT live another 12 years or at the very least, I may end up in a wheelchair. That was 23 yrs ago and the only time I've ever sat in a wheelchair is if they forced me to because of hospital regulations.

I certainly have had many days that I ran out of spoons, however and did have to learn early on that I had to ration mine and that some days just couldn't be spent without lying down and regrouping. Interestingly, however, the more I dwelt on the disease, the more the disease HAD ME. Today, 23 years later, I've learned that I HAVE the disease, the label, the diagnosis, but it has me no longer. Perspective is a powerful thing.. :)

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oh exactly Leatha, exactly. I was diagnosed with fybromyalgia, and there are days when I run out of spoons, but I make sure I hold the spoons.

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I don't have lupis, but I do have rheumatoid arthritis. I only have so many spoons to spend, too. My husband and child understand, but it's hard to explain to my mom, sister, friends, that I can't keep up because it feels like I'm walking on bone shards in my feet sometimes.

I'm lucky that my husband and daughter understand. I did a lot of walking and standing today and I can feel my feet and knees flaring up. Robert and Emily (husband and daughter) made plans to go to a movie tonight and didn't even think to ask me. Most people would be upset about not being invited. They saw me come home and realized I have no more spoons. Robert told me to relax and enjoy myself--not even fold laundry. Emily told me to take a bath and read a good book.

On the one hand, I'd love to go out with them, but on the other, I am touched that they understand me and my needs so well.

Plus, I've already seen the movie once...:)

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My husband has lupis and MS, the Spoon Theory has help me understand more about how he functions through the day. I appreciate that. Guess maybe I have been taking my "spoons" for granted and did not understand why he did not have as many "spoons" as I. Back on track now, thanks.

PJ

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    • LeighaTR

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      · 0 replies
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    • Doughgurl

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      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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