Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Second guessing myself!!



Recommended Posts

I think this is completely normal....I am a bit of a drama queen but the day of my surgery (after i was already hooked up to an IV) I wanted to run away! I went into a total panic and just wanted to go home! my very supportive family reminded me of all the time i have spent doing my research and all of the reasons i wanted to do this!!!! 5 min later I was being wheeled into the OR, put myself on the table, and the next thing i knew i woke up in recovery! Don't psych yourself out-it's normal!!!! :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Here I am less than a week away from being banded. Something I have worked really hard to get to. So, why am I second guessing this decision I thought I had already made. I am so confused right now. No one that understand to talk to about it. Is this normal to have second thought at the last minuite? What about all the "what if's?" Any advice is very much welcome. Are all these thoughts normal?

Yes I agree with everyone. completly normal. If fact i am in the same place as you. Worked so hard to get everything in place! Now I am starting to freak out a little. This really is scarry!!! But I will find the courage to get it done!!!! My date is April 20th!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, yes, yes, and YES! It is completely normal!!!

I originally was going to be banded 4 years ago. I managed to 2nd guess myself out of surgery with the idea that I really CAN do this myself, I was gonna give it one more honest attempt, etc etc etc.

Well, there I was four years later and 25 pounds heavier. Yes, I did manage to lose some, but found it all and they brought friends for a party and never left.

This time around, everything just seemed to fall into place. I had a money scare with my medical reimbursement account right before surgey and thought I might have to cancel at the last minute, so that helped to keep me focused on somthing other than the actual surgery. I was nothing other than excited all the way up until right after they started the IV for surgery. At that point I had a panicked moment of...

"what the heck are you doing? Do you realize what the long-term implications are? Exactly why is it that you are VOLUNTEERING to go under the knife? Do you really understand that you will never be able to have the same relationship with food again?"

About that time they let my daughter come back to keep me company until they took me in. What a Godsend! She is a joker and has a wonderful sense of humor. We laughed about my new attire of hospital gown, hat, and support socks. She took pictures for her Facebook. She grossed out about the IV. She teased that she was going to have to hide her clothes from me (she is a size 6). She basically took my mind off of everything serious.

Now, I have to wonder what the heck I was thinking by waiting so long. I am 56 pounds down from the day I started my pre-op diet and have gone from a size 20W to a size 12. I can purchase clothing anywhere and not just at the "Big Girl Store". I can walk two 15 minute miles on the treadmill without huffing and puffing and can survive a 55 minute Water aerobic class. The weight is not "falling off of me" like others like to comment, but I am averaging 1-2 pounds each week once I got past the liquid diet.

I have to be honest and admit that I have been one of the lucky ones who has not needed a fill and not had any complications, but I sometimes wonder what my life would be like now if I had done it when I had originally planned. Then I remind myself that everything happens for a reason and God has His own plan.

Good luck with your surgery and everything that goes along with it!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a great thread! I am just getting ready to start my 6 month supervised diet and I am second guessing myself, but after reading this, GOD willing I will have this surgery in 2012. I pray that all of you keep coming to the board to encourage those of us that are scared. You all are great!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thank you so much for posting this. Thank you to everyone that replied , this makes me feel like i am not crazy and I

am not by myself. I am supposed to get banded June7, I con`t to go over and over and over again in my head is this

for me . I know it is and just keep reinsuring myself, but the convo up above really hit home for me. I am ready to do

this no second guessing anymore.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am due to be banded on 4/18....you are NOT alone...here is my conversation with myself last night while drying my hair:

I'm looking at myself in the mirror.......

"are you sure you want to do this? This is going to be such a huge change to your life, are you sure you are ready for the 'after life'. Can you handle the pain, the changes? Are you ready to give up your lifestyle as it is. What about all the food you love? Why are you putting yourself through this. Everyone tells you that you can do it without the band. Maybe give it one more shot that way and not resort to surgery."

I say back to myself

"NO, jackass (that's what I call myself when I'm mad at my thoughts), you can't do it alone. You've lost the weight time and time again only to gain back more and more and more. You can lose it but you can't keep it off. Look how hard you have worked to get to this point. You had to dedicate yourself to changes. Why did you even start this if you aren't ready to do it. DO you want to look like this forever? Don't you want to be IN the pictures again instead of being the one who takes them all the time. Are you happy with how you are? Are you happy with who you are? Are you happy in general? Do you want to be healthy to play with your son and be around for your son? Do you want to make him proud to call you his mom? Why does food have such a meaning to you? What makes it so special? What is more important, a stupid hamburger or fitting into a rollercoaster seat so you can enjoy the amuzement park with your child. What is more important, stuffing yourself at Thanksgiving or having a healthy heart so you can see your child graduate high school, get married, raise his own children? Don't you just want to get out of the ugly fat clothes!"

I know what I must do and I'm going to do it. Yes, I'm scared, not of the surgery but my life after. But I know that I must do it for ME and I'm finally, finally ready to gain control. I need to do this to be healthy and HAPPY again. I think that part of the reason I love food so much is because it is my comfort because I'm fat and unhappy....the cycle, If I were happy with myself maybe i wouldn't need to the food to make me happy, and the food is making me fat which causes me to be unhappy! I'm tired of making jokes about myself so that others don't do it first....

You have to be ready, and if you have done the work then most likely are. It is scary and I probably bet almost everyone who has had any surgery second guesses it at some point (before and after), but a lot of them would do it all over again. I'm excited for my new healthy happy life to begin...it's going to be hard getting there but this life isn't working for me anymore and probably it isn't working for you if you are even considering the surgery. This is a huge decision.....and people who think we just decide one day to have surgery to have an "easy way out" have NO IDEA what goes inside of our hearts and heads and how much we struggle before (and after) surgery. This is huge....and you wouldn't have come this far if you weren't ready.

I had my surgery scheduled for May, and they had to reschedule it because the surgeon was going out of town. They moved it up to April 18th - a month earlier and I literally had a panic attack. I was sweating at the thought of getting it done sooner. I guess it was because I had less time to mentally prepare....although I've been preparing since July for this....I'm still scared and I second guess it all the time but I'm going through with it....start my liquid diet on Wednesday....

Good luck to you...good luck to all of us.

you are getting banded the same day i am so let me know how it goes for you and i will do the same and good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • vsg.with.sharon

      Hey everyone!
      I’m new here! Looking for some friends! 🥰
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LeighaTR

      Four days post surgery. I am sipping as fast as I can and getting NO WHERE near the goal of 60 - 80 grams of protein or the 64 oz of liquids. I just feel FULL. I don't know if it can still be the gas build up (I would think by now that would be gone) but it is a struggle to drink. And so far I have not had the nausea or spasms and don't want to wander into that territory by pushing too hard with liquids. I about passed out today as it was my most "strenuous" day. Went from second story to basement for shower and I was sure I was going to pass out. Looking back on my last few days I have had a total of less than 1000 calories. Am I just not getting enough nourishment in me? Once again a friday where I can't get ahold of the doc until Monday rolls back around so I am hoping maybe someone here has some experience on how to keep energy going. I do have fibromyalgia too and that may be where some added fatigue comes into play. How did you all fair with the goals the week after surgery?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      2 days until I fly out to San Diego to have my Bypass Surg. in Tiajuana Mexico. Not gonna lie, the nerves are starting to surface. I don't fear the surgery itself, or the fact that I'm traveling alone, but its the aftermath that I'm stressing about the most, after this 8 week wait. I'm excited to finally be here, but I am really dreading the post surgical chapter. I know its going to be tough, real tough and I think I'm just in my head to much now that the day i here. Wish me luck, Hopefully I'm one of the lucky ones, and everything goes smoothly. Cant wait to give an exciting update,. If there is anyone else have a June bypass or even a recent one, Id love to have someone to compare war stories with. Also, anyone near San Antonio Tx? See ya soon with the future me. 💜
      · 3 replies
      1. Phil Penn

        Good Luck this procedure is well worth it I am down to 249.6 lb please continue with the process..

      2. Selina333

        I'm in Houston so kind of near you and had the sleeve in Dec. Down 61 lbs. Feeling better. Was definitely worth it. I hope the everything is going well for you. Update us when you can!

      3. Doughgurl

        I am back home after my bypass surgery in Tiajuana. I'm post op day 4. Everything went great! I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who have not encountered much pain at all, no nausea thus far and I'm having no problem keeping down broths and water. Thank you for your well wishes. I cant wait to keep up this journey and have a chance at better health and simply better quality of life. I know there will be bumps in the road ahead, and everything won't be peaches and cream, but at least I have a great start so far. 😍

    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×