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She's approved, I'm trying to be supportive

MyKdsDad

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MyKdsDad    1

MyKdsDad
Posted

She (MsJoy) is approved. Now I'm being supportive. "We" have to get past the stress test. Hopefully she'll be banded on the 28th by Dr. Jayaseelan, in Dallas, TX. Any advice for the spouse?

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Alexandra    55

Alexandra
Posted

You have made a GREAT start just by coming here and posting!! Really, that shows an interest that many spouses just can't muster. :) You are doing great!!

The one thing my husband wishes he'd been better mentally prepared for, he says, are the times when I just had to leave the table when I was done eating. It really can take a long time for the bandster's brain to get used to the idea that the meal is OVER after only a small portion, and during that time sitting at the table while everyone else continues eating can be difficult. I literally had to get up and leave, and when that happens small children can be confused and the husband can feel abandoned. But it helped me immensely during the tough times, and I deeply appreciated his patience.

I hope we'll get to know you both. Welcome!!!

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MyKdsDad    1

MyKdsDad
Posted

Thanks Alexandra, that's one area I hadn't even thought about. Luckily our kids are 25 and 23, but mom wants to keep them in the dark until she's got something to show them. She's keeping it a secret from as many as possible because she doesn't want to be thought of as "weak". You know, having to use a band just to lose a little weight. I'm just standing by her, no matter what she wants. I just want her to be sure that she's here as long as she can be.

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shirley77519    0

shirley77519
Posted

I totally agree with Alex. I am not sure what weight / size your spouse is but I was unable to get into 30-32. Anything over that size is soooo hard to shop for. I say prepare for her to do some serious shopping, It is such an awesome feeling to actually go into a store and pick up something and say...I will take it!!

Huggs and good luck to yall.....Shirley

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MyKdsDad    1

MyKdsDad
Posted

Shirley, I've already been put on notice and I'm standing by with the checkbook. MsJoy and I have been married for 30 years as of Sept 5th, 2005. She's 5 foot 3 and knocking on 300. I use to buy her clothes, but after watching them come out of the box and go into the closet for the last few years, I don't do that anymore.....I really want to, though.

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MyKdsDad    1

MyKdsDad
Posted

Jack, could you suggest an emergency preparedness kit for those "new issues not forseen"?

And Cauerba, thanks for the encouragement. I'm just glad I found LBT. I would be willing to bet that I'll be leaning on someone before this is all over with.

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Shari Lou    0

Shari Lou
Posted

Dont forget about the mood swings, the short circuiting of our female brains due to the loss of sugar, carbs. Those dreaded hormones that are going crazy for the drop in weight.

Just practice the follow .....YES, DEAR..... it will be your friend and keep you out of alot of trouble in the beginning.

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MyKdsDad    1

MyKdsDad
Posted

MsJoy has her stress test tomorrow at Dr Gopal's office. Just down the hall from Dr J's office. What should we expect during the test?

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Go To Topic Listing Tell Your Weight Loss Surgery Story

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    • Alisa_S

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

        LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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