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Do I tell or do I keep it a secret???



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I just got approval for my surgery, it has been a long road, but it is going to be well worth it. I have only told my husband, parents and my best friend. I am wondering if I should tell the rest of my family, or keep it to myself? Anyone else wondering about this?

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I told my family once I had been approved. My family has been very supportive. I was laid off last year but maintain a close relationship with some former coworkers. I have not told them yet. I did have to postpone my surgery so it ended up taking longer than normal. I will wait to tell them until I meet them again for lunch (we usually get together once a quarter).

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For me, I am only telling my husband and a sister that I am very close with. Looking thru the site you will see lots of people positive reasons for telling others w/great stories of support.

You will also find a million stories of how badly it can go wrong when they share. I say you have to really really assess the people you want to tell to find out if it will be safe for you. Besides the trying to talk you out of it, saying you took the easy way out stories....there is the feeling of being monitored all of the time. I would hate that! The weeks that the scale is not budging (or even going up) I cant imagine all of the "how much have you lost" questions. "Should you be eating that?"

Not for me.

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I decided to be upfront about my surgery. I figured if I ever had an incident where I needed their help, it would best benefit me if they knew ahead of time. But, at the same time my mom was banded before me, so I already knew how people would respond.

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I have chosen to tell my family and a few close friends. I am also afraid of the constant judgement and monitoring. I figure when I reach my personal goal then I will tell the reaminder of my friends. That way I will be proof that it works and I won;t have to deal with the skeptics.

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I had surgery back in June. I wish I would have only told close family...because everyone is "expecting" to see how much weight I'm loosing. Plus, you always have those people who are "frenemies" that you have to watch out for. Ahh well!

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I only told my children at first and when I told my parents it was like I was sinning. My dad doesn't say much but my mom thinks its a bad idea because she has only heard the bad stuff from the tv. She'll see when all is said and done.

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So far, I have only told my mother and this guy I have worked with for a long time, who I trust. I will be telling my dad, sister and her fiance (only because I know my sister will tell him), I am going to tell my supervisor when I give my time off request, only because I have a physical job and will probably have to limit lifting and stuff for a couple weeks and I don't want her to think I am slacking.

I'm don't think I am going to really let it out right away, I may eventually tell, but not right now.

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I've told everybody in my life.

Mainly because I'm just so excited, but also because I really don't care if they support me or not.

This is me, this is what I want and I don't need anyone else to validate what I'm doing for my own health and vanity.

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hi, so far the only ones that I have told are a few close friends of mine, my husband of course knows. My two oldest daughters know but my youngest I haven't said anything to. I don't think I will say anything to anyone else for awhile because I don't want to hear any negative.

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I've only told my husband, parents and sisters. Oh and my longtime neighbor since I bumped into her at the hospital while having my pre-op tests done. Once I have the surgery, I'll tell more people (like my in-laws).

I haven't told anyone else because I don't want to hear any negative comments or how I'm choosing "the easy way", because this wasn't a decision that I came to overnight.

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I started off by only telling my immediate family. Now I will tell if I am asked about my weight loss. I have also been hearing alot of "horror" stories - that is why I haven't been very open about the lap band.

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Im asking myself the same question! My immediate family knows and fiance. I want to keep it a secret from my friends because I want to surprise them and have them wonder lol Also, I see them a couple times a month due to work and school and just busy schedule so it will just seem like I have been trying to lose weight and time has passed by.

But my quetion is what do I tell my co-workers and boss? I gave my boss a heads up for Dec or Jan I will be taking a couple days off but im not sure when until insurance approves and I set the date. She keeps asking me silly questions like are you getting a nose job, boob job, stomach stappled, hair implants, botax, sex change I just told her she will see after a couple of months. Now what about the co-workers I eat lunch with? They will see that I will be on a liquid diet for the 2 weeks before surgery and couple weeks after. What do I tell them now?:rolleyes2:

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I told most of my family but only a few know on my husband's side of the family. I also told one friend. I am glad I didn't make a big announcement or let everyone know because my weightloss has been fairly slow. There have been times I have felt guilty when someone has asked "How did you do it!?" and I say, "counting my calories and exercising!" Both of which are true but I have that extra help from the band.

As far as whether or not you should tell or keep it a secret, I think that depends on your personality. If you are an open book and the type to not dwell on what others think, then I would say tell whoever you want to tell. If you are more private and do concern yourself with what others think about you, then I would say only tell people when you are completely comfortable with it. :rolleyes2:

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Im asking myself the same question! My immediate family knows and fiance. I want to keep it a secret from my friends because I want to surprise them and have them wonder lol Also, I see them a couple times a month due to work and school and just busy schedule so it will just seem like I have been trying to lose weight and time has passed by.

But my quetion is what do I tell my co-workers and boss? I gave my boss a heads up for Dec or Jan I will be taking a couple days off but im not sure when until insurance approves and I set the date. She keeps asking me silly questions like are you getting a nose job, boob job, stomach stappled, hair implants, botax, sex change I just told her she will see after a couple of months. Now what about the co-workers I eat lunch with? They will see that I will be on a liquid diet for the 2 weeks before surgery and couple weeks after. What do I tell them now?:rolleyes2:

I wouldn't tell my lunch buddies or boss. Just tell them that you are trying to lose weight and you are doing a liquid diet to kick start your diet. Which is really not a lie because the liquid diet helps cleanse our liver and gets it ready to filter out the fat more efficiently.

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