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How to deal with snacks and a family



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:crying:I'm wondering how you've handled this issue...

I've got a wonderful guy and 2 beautiful step daughters... He has been so supportive through this (haven't had surgery yet) but he doesn't understand my trouble with food... mainly my trouble NOT eating Cookies and ice cream and chips if they're in the house. I don't think asking to not have these in the house while I am going through this is a lot to ask. They can all eat junk food other places to get their fix. If he was recovering from a heart attack (God forbid) and we had to restrict fats and sodium, we would. We wouldn't be eating big macs and french fries and ice cream in front of him, nor would we ask him to stop at the store on the way home and get the restricted food for us... so why can't they understand that I NEED to not have it around for a while, and I can not be the one buying it. I need to NOT touch it at all until I know I can resist... and at this time I know I can't.

So how do I explain this? How do you tell someone who really believes "you just have to not eat it" will work?

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I have a DH and also 3 grandbabies I take care of a couple times a week and I keep snack cakes and I also bake alot for them I make my DH a big full country dinner every night, The way I handle it is I have my worst fat picture I could find hanging on the fridge. It helps remind me of where I don't want to be. I will say I have the advantage of already having a band but it really helped me with my 2wk pre op also. Then there are days where I just let myself have a little something but I always count it in my calorie count for the day. It might help ir you start journaling your food now. Try fitday.com. Sorry I couldn't be of more help. Lots of luck.

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I'm sorry that you're going through this and having difficulty resisting food that is within arm's length. My belief though is that we can't ask others to change for us in much the same way that our own internal changes must be for us and not for others. My significant other is naturally thin and loves to snack at home. That hasn't been easy to deal with for the past five weeks of my all liquid diet and it honestly doesn't get easier. I wouldn't ask that those things be removed from our home though as I think it's up to me to resist them just as I would resist pulling into a fast food restaurant and grabbing a quick burger. It's my job. Every time I open the pantry and see the Cookies and chips it's difficult. Every time I smell the yummy food being prepared it's difficult. I keep imagining though that it will get easier once I get restriction. As mentioned below, journaling your food intake really does help and so does going for a walk when you're feeling a major urge to snack. Good luck and hang in there.

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Wow, I think I posted that myself (nah, not really, but this is something I have had problems with for years). Have you tried throwing the stuff out? I know, expensive but I would think it would take like one or two times. They just do not get it. Or, maybe you can request that he take your daughters OUT for ice cream or dessert. My husband is notorious for this, and I must say, that since getting my band, he is a little more receptive. He brought home a cake the other day (yes, shame on me but I tried and had no problem) I allotted it in my calories, but told him the next morning when he went to work, the cake went with him. Understand honey, you are not alone in this boat. {{{{Hugs}}}}

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I have spent my entire life fighting my weight and that was one of my biggest battles. I was a kid and while my family ate fried chichen I was expected to eat salads.

You need to honestly tell him that you have not reached the point in your journey to handle the temptation when it is so readily available.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
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