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I've gone mental...



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So I finally had the fill of fills. You know, the one where you can no longer eat the crap you're not supposed to be eating anyway without it all coming back up? It's actually kind of great because I'm eating a lot less and I'm not hungry very often. However...my brain has started to panic over the fact that it can't have "the crap" and subsequently all I do is walk the halls in a desperate search for food that I don't/won't eat. I'm like an alcoholic looking for the bottle of vodka I hid from my family. Yikes. :thumbup:

(For the record, when I say "crap" I mean things like crackers, Very Thin wheat toast, Pasta. I don't even care about chips or cupcakes anymore. Well, maybe a little.)

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sweet spot for you? It does get better. Without the "real hunger", the head hunger gets better after awhile.

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I don't know if it's the sweet spot or not. I'm actually thinking it may be a little too tight. I'm getting some stuff down in the afternoon and evening, but have been pb'ing a lot (maybe I have to chew even more). I want to wait a bit until I decide to take some Fluid out because it's only been a week since the fill. My body and mind both need time to adjust. My brain's panic for bad food is actually amusing me for some reason. Almost like I can't believe how far gone I was with my food addiction!

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That's what I was thinking, You might be a little to tight. Just keep an ear out and listen to your body.

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Goalwatcher, After my last fill it took a little longer for me to work my way back in to more foods. The few important things I watched for were coughing at night, acid reflux, and the ability to eat/drink full liquids. I think it is so different for everyone with the sweet spot. I have stayed very tight from my 2nd fill in September. Others may have gone back for an unfill. If I had the night coughing and stuff I would have had a tiny unfill, but I am doing ok with being pretty tight.

How much have you lost?

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I haven't had any coughing, acid reflux, etc. Just pb's. Yesterday I was able to eat with only one incident in the morning. Things seem to be going down somewhat more smoothly now. For example, I could hardly eat my Greek yogurt yesterday, and today, while it went down slowly, I ate the entire container with no problems. I knew I just had to get used to changing what I was doing, how I was eating (bite sizes, chewing, taking my time). The reason I was hesitant to contact the doctor is that creamy Soups, puddings, and drinks were all going down just fine, and I was sometimes even able to take large gulps. I'm glad I held off!

I have lost 45 lbs since surgery. I think one of the main reasons I haven't lost more is because at my appointment that was supposed to be my third fill I didn't allow them to do it. I felt my second fill still needed some adjustment time. My third fill was just last week. In between those two fills (November to January) I only lost 2 lbs. I had increased my exercise, but I didn't make the smartest food choices. At least I didn't gain over the holidays! By the time last week rolled around, I was able to eat well over a cup of food at a time, and I knew that I needed this next fill.

Looks as if you've done really well! I'm envious. How much do you want to lose total? I'm just aiming to get under 200 in the next month or so.

Last Friday I was at Macy's trying on clothes, and for the first time in maybe 20 years I saw a normal person in the mirror. I got a little teary.

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It really sounds like you are at your sweet spot. I hope you are. You just may feel a little too tight for longer than you expected, but the weight will start coming off better. I want to take off at least 114 lbs total.

I want to be at 150 lbs. I am 5'7", but have very small bone structure I think. Maybe even 140 lbs.

I was about 130 lbs when I met my husband, but don't think that weight is realistic. ...plus with the extra skin I will have.....

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Goalwatcher-

Headhunger bites the big one huh? My head still hasn't shut up after 10months! But I guess when it's been talking to me for 26years, it may think it has a right. haha

I was just going to mention that when you get a fill/adjustment- maybe giving your stomach a rest. My surgeon advises that you do a clear liq diet for a day or 2 after the fill/adjustment and work up to fulls for a couple of days & then to soft and then normal food again! Gives your tummy time to rest from the "trauma." I've found it to be a good idea, especially since I'm not hungery after the fills.

Just an idea :thumbup:

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

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        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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