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Jax, my new Body Bugg, came today. YAY! I can't wait to get home tonight to get it all hooked up and ready to go. I have PROMISED myself that I will do a few productive things before I start. Ha! I fully expect this thing to make me lose 30 pounds in the next 3 months! Just kidding! I know it won't do the work for me, but wouldn't it be nice? Yesterday was my 2nd full day of logging calories consumed. I worked SO hard and what was my reward?? No movement on the scale. It must be broken. Surely if I'm doing something I don't want to be doing, the earth would shift, the heavens would shine down on me and I would get what I want, right? Apparently, the universe begs to differ. Off to do some work. I will post some pictures of me and Jax tomorrow.

Well, let's see. Yeah, I did. I bawled like a baby. No matter how hard I tried to keep the calories down and do what I was supposed to do, I still gained weight. I don't see how. But I did. On Friday, October 27, I found out I weigh 280 pounds. That's the heaviest I've ever been in my life. I don't want it to become 290 or 300 or... more. I am also diabetic, have sleep apnea, bad knees, bad ankles, bursitis in both shoulders, chronic bronchitis, depression, absolutely NO energy for exercise.. shall I go on???? Dr. S., my endocrinologist, has referred me to who she thinks is the best to do the surgery. I've printed out the paperwork so I can fill it out and send it in. I've called the insurance companies (I actually have two, strangely enough) to find out their take on this. :angry UHC, of course, states that my policy does not cover WLS. Period. WHATever. I will fight it, of course. My second insurance, which is from my DH being retired military, will cover at least 80% of the cost, if not more.:clap2: We'll see. So at least I know I have one hurdle partially done. Funny thing, when I finally decided I wanted to do this, I want it over NOW. Is that normal? I guess it is for me. I'm not a patient soul.

Went for a walk today in the most bizarre weather. It was so foggy and you could feel the temperatures change as you went from one area to another. Even though it was one in the afternoon, I wished I had brought a light because it was so foggy. I miss walking outside so much I could cry. I am sucking up every shred of evidence that Spring is coming. Easter stuff in the stores. Local pancake house opening soon. 57 degrees today. Lots of potholes. I have been too hungry lately so I scheduled a fill for 2/28. Since I am a teacher and this is my vacation week I will call to see if there are any last minute cancellations. My restriction is great until 5 in the evening. Then the gates of hell open and temptation begans. I still love food! Lot's of banders say they lose interest-you know eat to live, but I still love food. Tomorrow the inevitable grocery shopping-What shall we buy. kashi golean, whipped fat free, sugar free cream, bananas, laughing cow cheese. V8, some south beach protein bars, 60 calorie pudding cups. I still have lots of other food. I throw out a lot of food because I can't eat it all before it spoils. I never think to freeze stuff. What a wasteroo!!:thumbup:

Even when I weighed 150 I thought I was fat! I used to go to diet Dr.s all the time.....to get shots, or pills or what ever the fad was. I would just say I need to loose 30 pounds, they would give me diet pills and a shot (vit. or what ever and give me a 1000 calorie diet plan and out the door I would go, 2 weeks worth of amphetamines neatly tucked away in my purse! That was a long time ago, and they don't really prescribe anything like what they used to! Oh well!

Eat slowly and chew thoroughly Food can pass through the new stoma only of it has been into very small pieces. Always remember to take more time for your meals and chew your food very well. Stop eating as soon as you feel full Once your stomach is full, your body receives a signal that you have eaten enough. It takes time, though, for you to become aware of this signal. If you rush through your meal, you may eat more than you need. This can lead to nausea and vomiting. Take time to eat you meal. Try to recognize the feeling the fullness - then stop eating at once. Do not drink while you are eating This operation can work only if you eat solid food. If you drink at mealtimes, the food you have eaten becomes liquid and the effectiveness of the LAP-BAND System is greatly reduced. You should not drink anything for one to two hours after a meal. This allows you to keep the feeling of fullness as long as possible. Do not eat between meals After a meal, do not eat anything else until the next meal. Eating snacks between meals is one of the major reasons for weight-loss failure. It is very important to break this habit. Patients with proper "fill" levels do not feel hungry in between meals. If you are, this may be a sign that your band is too loose and you should tell your clinician. Eat only good quality food With the LAP-BAND System in place, you should be able to able to eat only a small amount so the the food you eat should be as healthy as possible. Do not fill your small stomach pouch with junk food that lacks vitamins and other important nutrients. Your meals should be high in protein and vitamins. Fresh vegetables, fruit, meat and cereals are good foods to choose. Foods high in fat and sugar are not. You may eat apples and oranges, but try to avoid orange juice and and apple juice. Ask your doctor or dietician before you take any vitamin supplements. Avoid fibrous food Food such as asparagus that contains many fibers can block the stoma. That's because you can't chew this food well enough to break it up into small pieces and your saliva can't break it down. Fibrous food should be avoided. If you would like to eat asparagus or other fibrous foods once in a while, then you must be sure to cook them well, cut them into very small pieces and them chew them thoroughly. Drink enough fluids during the day If you lose weight, your fat content will drop. This results in waste products. You will need to drink large amounts of liquid every day in order to urinate more and excrete these waste products from your body. Individual needs will vary, but you should drink at least 6 to 8 glasses of water a day. Drink only low-calorie liquids. Drinks, including those containing calories, simply run through the narrow outlet created by the band. If you drink liquids high in calories, you will lose little weight, even if you otherwise follow your diet. Exercise at least 30 minutes a day This rule is just as important as the other nine rules. Since physical exercise consumes energy and burns calories, it is very important to successful weight loss. Exercise can help improve your general health. Your size may make it hard for you to exercise as much as you should. But get started, even if it is a little at first. The more weight you lose, the easier it should get. Start with simple exercises such as walking and swimming. Gradually expand you program to include more vigorous forms of exercise such as cycling, jogging and aerobics. Increase your activity level in the course of daily living. For example, stand rather than sit, walk rather than stand, be outside rather than inside, walk rather than drive, climb the stairs rather than use the elevator, etc. Remember you should always check with your doctor about the amount and type of exercise that is best for you. Food Choices Use this section to help you plan what you eat. you may choose what you would like from each of these food groups on a daily basis: Fruits and vegetable 1 to 2 servings of fresh fruit daily 2 to 3 servings of fresh vegetable daily Bread and Cereals 1 small portion of corn flakes for breakfast 1 to 2 slices of whole wheat or rye bread each day Meat, Fish, Poultry, Eggs 1 oz. to 2 oz. of meat, fish or poultry or one egg each day (remove all visible fat from the meat. remove the ski from poultry. Grilling, steaming, microwaving or boiling are best ways to prepare them with low fat). Dairy Products Milk and yogurt are calories in liquid form. In theory, then, they should be avoided. But these types of food have calcium. That makes them an important part of a healthy daily diet. Choose a maximum of 2 cups of skimmed milk or low-fat yogurt and 1 oz. of cheese a day. Fats Restrict the use of fat to 3 to 4 teaspoons of margarine, butter or oil per day. You can have low-fat salad dressing and mayonnaise in moderation. Drink as many calorie-free liquids per day as you wish. Suitable drinks are: Tea or black coffee with low-calorie sweetener Water Non-carbonated beverages containing few or no calories Clear soup Note: Some doctors have reported that carbonated beverages may contribute to enlargement of the small pouch and should be avoided. Foods to Avoid Some foods have a concentrated supply of calories with little nutritional value and should be avoided as much as possible. They include: Sugar and foods containing large quantities of sugar, such as: High-calorie soft drinks Syrups Cakes Biscuits Sweets Jam Marmalade Honey High-fat foods including: Chocolate Pies Chips pastries Alcoholic drinks should also be consumed in moderation

Met with my NUT practice today(not the one affliated w/my surgeon). I explained that I was confused about what to eat and how much(don't know about everyone else, but I've gotten so many conflicting tidbits that I've got pages of notes). So the ladies get out the ADA Pocket Guide to Bariatric Surgery - Appendix C - LAGB Stages and Postadjustment Diet Instructions. Right there on the front it says, "Note: There is no evidence supporting a specific diet transition. Expert opinion suggests (a) a staged approach; ( diet advanced as tolerated. Some other notes of interest: Stage III (whole grain crackers may be added to eat with protein) StageIV (your calorie needs are based on height, weight , age and activity - so much for the "1,000 calorie" pat answer) Another great help was the ADA's EatRight - Bariatric Surgery Blended and Pureed Nutrition Therapy which provided a Sample Menu by Hour with amounts to consume - you are literally eating or drinking every hour from 8am to 10pm! I had no clue - so this will help as I go through the stages again following my fills.

Feeling much better today. It seems that once I realize what the cause of my stress is...regardless of whether I can do anything about it... I feel better. Just knowing the cause it a relief!! So now I'm 6 days after my 2nd adjustment (well 2nd, 3rd & 4th) ... and I'm finally able to drink without pain. I'm still taking it slowly as far as eating is concerned. Egg salad, tuna salad, cottage cheese, yogurt etc. Keeping it soft just in case. I am in love with shadybrook farm turkey meatballs!!! As an italian with the mac daddy meatball recipe... I highly approve of these. They are nothing like MY meatballs, but as far as turkey products are concerned...they are GREAT!!! They have a little bit of spice, but just enough to make it interesting. The texture is great too. They are pretty low calorie vs beef products and they have a good amount of protein!!! They have been my "go-to" protein source!! Also, Jennie-O hot dogs are fabulous. A regular hot dog has about 170 calories each!! These have only 70 and taste just like a beef hot dog without the greasiness. And in my area... a package of the Jennie-O hot dogs is only $1!!! Crazy right?? Butterball makes a great Turkey Kielbasa too...that is awesome on the grill!! Shadybrook farms has good Sweet and Hot italian sausage... it's not bad. The texture isn't quite like pork sausage, but it's pretty decent!! Anyone else have any secret foods they'd like to share??? :smile:

I have had the munchies all day long today. I've done pretty good. I've had a bowl of chili, with a 1/4 cup of cheese, a protien bar from south beach, my sugar free pudding for the meds that I crush and a couple handfuls of cinnamon wheat thins. I have drank water, serveral glasses and just switched to crystal light lemonade. Need to get supper fix, having left overs. I still have problems eating chicken. I just doesn't go down very good. I going to eat meatloaf tonight and leave the chicken to my dh. I have to pack my bags, new york here I came. I'm getting excited about going. Hope all goes well. I going to take a few protien bars and my crystal light with me. I will have to play it by ear on what I will eat there. Breakfast should be no problem. I have been tracking my foods on fitday.com and I am still getting to many fats and carbs. Fats seem to be in every thing. I will have to work on that when I get back. It is a really good way to see how I'm doing. I have been much better the last couple of day on my calorie count, around 1500 cal a day. I will be happy with that as long as I start to lose. I really need to excerise more. Maybe next week in New York will jump start my walking. I have this deadly fear of dogs and when I go by myself it really worrys me. Need to work on that fear. I not so down on myself today either. I'm going to watch my 2 youngest grandkids tomorrow. That should keep me busy for awhile. I told them only for a couple of hours as I have a lot to do. If I didn't watch them once and while I would never see them and they are so cute. I what my grandkids to remember me some day with fondest, like I do my grandmothers. Oh well its supper time.

Weight today 203! Total: 980 Fat:34 307 32% Carbs:52 191 20% Fiber:4 0 0% Protein:73 293 31% Alcohol:22 155 16% Activity - 30 mins on treadmill 3.1mph @ 2.5 incline - 200 cals recumbant bike - 10 mins - 50 cals Net calories 730

Yay for you!!! so glad your doing so well. I am feeling like i am in the same boat.. lost some weight after surgery but not seeing any movement on the scale. :biggrin: I know it is a process but man after spending all that money... I am wanting some quicker results.. :thumbup: i know i know. Fill two will hopefully be much better. I just want it now:).. My workout goal is to include yoga 3-5 times a week. I went on Sat and Mon and BOY AM I SORE TODAY!!! yaoozaar. I feel EVERY Muscle in my body. Trying to stay positive and continue to love myself without over eating.. Oh yeah.. for eating out. I have been checking out the soups. They tend to go down well and not have to many calories. Mexican resturants i do Beans rice and veggies, cheap and good protein. i can still eat sushi rolls. ooh and shrimp cocktails too.. purrfect. take care and let me know how it goes with Dr Smith. Can you go in when ever you want or do they make you wait a long time before the next fill. i think he only comes up to ABQ once a month or so ... boo.. I was even thinking about coming back to dfw just to get a fill.. LOL...

CONSISTENCY *If the food you are eating is keeping you full for 3 or less hours you must increase the consistency/thickness of your food. (Generally when you are on clear liquids and ready to move to full liquids, full liquid to mushy, etc) *If the food you are eating is keeping you full for 4 or more hours your food is at a good consistency/thickness. *As soon as you feel full (this may feel like discomfort in your chest) STOP EATING. If you ever feel like something is stuck STOP! Do not drink or eat. Typically, in 30 minutes the food will come up or go down. · Special note: If all you can eat is soft/mushy foods, you are too tight and need fluid out of the band. ADJUSTMENTS · You are ready for an adjustment when you are eating good solid nutritious food (the highest consistency) and it is no longer keeping you full for 4 hours and/or your portions are increasing, and/or you are not losing weight. DAILY ROUTINE · Upon waking drink 20 oz of water (anything 1 calorie or less, no caffeine, no carbonation). The first 8 oz may need to be hot clear liquid. This is also a good rule to apply when preparing your meals. (If you feel pressure/tightness, you need to loosen your band before you eat with hot clear liquids and deep breaths, then repeat water process) · Wait 10 minutes. No eating or drinking (let the fluid drain out of the pouch). When dining out, this would be when you are waiting on your food. At home this will be the time you take cutting meat, moistening meat, and getting it ready to eat) · Breakfast: Protein 1st (use fork and knife and cut up food well), Fruit 2nd (Sample breakfast: ½ cup low fat, low sugar yogurt, 2 T of almonds, ¼ piece of fruit w/ no skin OR 1 very soft, moist scrambled egg, 1 crisp piece of bacon, ¼ piece of fruit w/ no skin · Wait 1 ½ hours (no eating or drinking) · Drink 20 oz of water up until time for lunch. · Wait 10 minutes. No eating or drinking (let the fluid drain out of pouch) · Lunch: Protein 1st (use fork and knife and cut up your food well), vegetable 2nd, carbohydrate 3rd (sample lunch: ½ cup chili (beef or turkey and beans), 4 whole grain crackers OR 1/3 cup chicken salad, ½ seedless cucumber, 4 whole grain crackers OR 1-2 oz grilled chicken on 1 cup garden salad w/ low fat dressing, 4 whole grain crackers · Wait 1 ½ hours (no eating, drinking) · Drink 20 oz of water up until time for supper. · Wait 10 minutes. No eating or drinking (let fluid drain out of pouch) · Supper: Protein 1st (use a fork and knife and cut up food well), vegetable 2nd, carbohydrate 3rd (sample supper: ½ cup stew (beef and vegetable), 4 whole grain crackers OR 1-2 oz meatloaf, ¼ cup green beans, ¼ cup mashed potatoes OR 1-2 oz bake or grilled fish, 2-3 tops of broccoli (steamed and very tender), very small baked potato w/ no skin · Wait 1 ½ hours (no eating or drinking) · If you are getting hungry between meals, you are waiting for an adjustment and you feel you must eat a snack, it should be a protein snack. (low fat chunk cheese, T of peanut butter, nuts, turkey jerky) · Once you get close to your ideal body weight you may have to pay closer attention to your calories. You should not have more than 1200 calories a day. They also recommend when drinking right before your meal to drink/gulp to see if it moves smoothly. This will let you know if you are ready to eat yet. Also, my doctor's office does not recommend snacks.

Had a quiet day at home yesterday. Pain is almost gone. Incisions itching like crazy!!! Took a 20 min walk. Had trouble getting my food in 'cause I'm getting bored with everything I have in the pantry. Protein was horrible, fat was way high, calories too low. Will try again tomorrow! Total: 728 Fat:40 357 49% Sat:21 189 26% Poly:3 29 4% Mono:11 96 13% Carbs:63 224 31% Fiber:7 0 0% Protein:36 144 20%

I have an appointment to see Dr. Curry this morning at 11:00am. I am excited, yet nervous. Last night I dreamed that he told me that I wasn't a good candidate for a lap band, and told me to go home and lose weight the "old fashioned" way. Well, THAT way hasn't worked for me at all. I've been fat ever since I can remember. My parents and three siblings were never fat, but I was. Mom started taking me to Weight Watcher's meetings when I was 8 years old. She gave me Ayds to chew on, helped me count calories, signed me up for gymnastics and dancing lessons in the hope I'd burn more calories and lose weight, threatened and cajoled me into losing weight, bought my sister new clothes but not me, in the hopes that I'd "straighten up" and lose weight, punished me other various ways because I wouldn't lose weight, had me on various liquid diets, including the Cambridge Diet, took me to a hypnotist for subliminal weight-loss messages, and paid for me to go to Diet Center. In my adult life I continued to life with family put-downs because of my weight and I finally topped out at 352 pounds. I stopped eating on July 1, 1998 and in 23 months I lost over 150 pounds. But that's only because I was eating about two cups of food a day, and mostly protein. Since that time I've tried to stay to two cups of food a day, but I cannot. I've steadily gained weight (big surprise) and am now back up to 247 pounds. At this rate, before the end of 2007, I'll be right back up over 300 pounds. I've calculated that I've lost and gained close to 200 pounds over and over again in my lifetime, and I'M SICK TO DEATH OF THIS STUPID HAMSTER WHEEL I'M ON!!!!!!!! Please, Dr. Curry............you're my last hope!

I have an appointment to see Dr. Curry this morning at 11:00am. I am excited, yet nervous. Last night I dreamed that he told me that I wasn't a good candidate for a lap band, and told me to go home and lose weight the "old fashioned" way. Well, THAT way hasn't worked for me at all. I've been fat ever since I can remember. My parents and three siblings were never fat, but I was. Mom started taking me to Weight Watcher's meetings when I was 8 years old. She gave me Ayds to chew on, helped me count calories, signed me up for gymnastics and dancing lessons in the hope I'd burn more calories and lose weight, threatened and cajoled me into losing weight, bought my sister new clothes but not me, in the hopes that I'd "straighten up" and lose weight, punished me other various ways because I wouldn't lose weight, had me on various liquid diets, including the Cambridge Diet, took me to a hypnotist for subliminal weight-loss messages, and paid for me to go to Diet Center. In my adult life I continued to life with family put-downs because of my weight and I finally topped out at 352 pounds. I stopped eating on July 1, 1998 and in 23 months I lost over 150 pounds. But that's only because I was eating about two cups of food a day, and mostly protein. Since that time I've tried to stay to two cups of food a day, but I cannot. I've steadily gained weight (big surprise) and am now back up to 247 pounds. At this rate, before the end of 2007, I'll be right back up over 300 pounds. I've calculated that I've lost and gained close to 200 pounds over and over again in my lifetime, and I'M SICK TO DEATH OF THIS STUPID HAMSTER WHEEL I'M ON!!!!!!!! Please, Dr. Curry............you're my last hope!

I watched a documentary last night on The History Channel about the history of tobacco and its uses. It wasn’t a biased program – anti-smoking Nazi’s, et al – rather, it was truly about the history of tobacco – from the growing of it originally in the Americas by Native Americans for various needs, to the distribution of it across the world, thanks to the Europeans who had the means to ship it back to the mother country and beyond – for personal use as well as financial gain. The hour-long show detailed all kinds of tobacco use – cigars, cigarettes, pipe tobacco, snuff, moist tobacco, and chewing tobacco. As I sat there and watched, I waited for the anti-smoking rhetoric to being. But it never did. Instead, facts were laid out very matter-of-factly. I debated at first whether to even watch the show, given my state of mind. Yesterday was a bad day for me, as far as nicotine cravings go. It was my fourth day smoke-free, and it was the worst day thus far. The documentary showed frequent images of people smoking cigarettes. I wondered how that would affect me. Would I crave one all the more? I nearly changed the station, but changed my mind. I continued to watch. And I’m so glad that I did. Today’s blend of cigarette is not comprised solely of tobacco. It’s only half tobacco – and that half is laced with enticing food flavorings such as chocolate and sugar, to mellow the original tobacco into a pleasing form. The other fifty percent of a cigarette is made up of “recon” – tobacco product remnants swept from the tobacco factory floors, mingled with cigarettes sent back to the factory because their shelf life has expired. And then there’s the chemicals. Aside from the few I knew of – tar, ammonia, acetone, and carbon monoxide – I was surprised to find the myriad more: arsenic (rat poison), styrene (think of the things that Big Macs used to be packaged in – those Styrofoam containers), lead, methanol (rocket fuel!), and the one that REALLY gave me the willies -- hydrogen cyanide. That’s the poison they use to kill the bad guys in the gas chambers, folks. Holy crap! I’m a real hypocrite, yanno? I mean, for the past several years I’ve taken great pains to record what I eat – down to the most miniscule ingredient – recording those findings into FitDay, counting calories and carbohydrates, making sure that I don’t ingest sugar, and thinking very well of myself for doing all of that. Yet, I ingested arsenic and cyanide on an hourly basis for years. What the Hell was I thinking? How could I think that that was an okay thing to do? Well, I didn’t think it was okay. In fact, I knew that it wasn’t okay. What had me hooked was the nicotine. In fact, the documentary last night reinforced what my doctor had been telling me since last year. Smoking brings pleasure because it affects the pleasure centers of the brain. What he DIDN’T tell me – and what I found out last night – was that the more I smoked, the more nicotine/pleasure receptors developed in my brain, waiting to be fed, so the more I smoked, the more of those thingies popped up, waiting to be fed, the more I smoked……. You get the drift. It’s a vicious cycle. Much like overeating. The more you eat, the more you are ABLE to eat, because the more fat cells your body produce, waiting to be filled, the more you eat, yadda, yadda, yadda. So, I’m a double threat. I’ve been fat since I was a little child, so I have all of these fat cells waiting to be filled. They’ve been filled and then unfilled through weight loss more times than I’m willing to admit. And now that I’ve smoked all of these years, I have all of these nicotine receptors waiting to be filled in my brain. Holy Jesus weepin’ on the cross. What a fool I’ve been all of these years. I’m gonna quit whining and complaining that I’m craving a cigarette and just suck it up. I did this to myself, so I can just undo it. These cravings will stop eventually – possibly days – possibly months or even years – but, so the Hell what? I can’t go back to mistreating my body. I only have one, and I don’t get another shot at this. I’ll think about that today when the cravings hit.

Goooood morning all. I was so scared prior to starting the pre-op diet (which I've started 2 weeks early) that there was no way I was going to be able to survive that phase without massive cheating from the start. I'm an all or nothing girl - I either don't cheat at all or I cheat big time. The last 10 years or so I have not been able to survive more than about half a day of any diet without cheating and I was terrified this would be true with this pre-op thing. This time I, with Lisa's help, applied the "Yes, I can" attitude and guess what - Despite my seriously jonesin' for some seriously bad food (especially the first three days), I'm on the fifth day of the pre-op diet and I'm I have not had one single bit of food that one would not classify as a healthy choice!! Not only am I surviving but I am feeling great. It is so much easier when you think this is the last time you're going to have to do this and you can see the finish line is just a few weeks away. I can't wait for the next official weigh in (never thought I'd say those words!!). I've decided my Thursday morning weight is going to be my official weight. I tend to weigh myself constantly (which I know is really not a good thing to do). The first two days were hell on earth - I was so hungry that I could eat a horse and then chase after the jockey! Also, I had shocking sugar withdrawal headaches that didn't go away despite me drinking litres of water and taking Panadol (Tylendol for US readers). Then, there's the crankiness - no one else was gonna have any fun if I wasn't having any!! I think having both Lise and I going through the same thing made it easier for both of us - one could help the other through their humps and provide encouragement to keep going. Also, as we're both fiercely competitive, one couldn't let herself lapse if the other one wasn't lapsing too. There were moments where each of us tried to cajole the other into giving into temptation but, fortunately for both of us, the two of us didn't feel the same way at the same time and one could always help steer the other toward the healthier choice. The only exception was last night where we both thought we should swap a shake for a very small serving of lamb (from a spit) and salads. Neither of us see this as a cheat. The calories are no worse than the shake and its a swap of protein for protein. Are we kidding ourselves?? If you've got an opinion, please let us know. To distract ourselves, we're going out a lot - we went to the movies on Thursday night, we took our gorgeous two-year old nephew to the park on Sat arvo and then we played poker at the fabulous poker room at Melbourne's Crown Casino on Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights (which ended up a profitable exercise to boot)!! For anyone out there that was in my boat about wondering if they could survive the few days of the pre-op diet, I'm living proof that "YES, YOU CAN". Just do it. The first few days are horrid but they can be survived and it is true that it gets easier after those initial few days. The other thing that has been on my mind over the last few days have been thoughts about how I ever got to my current weight. I feel my biggest mistake was thinking I was fat when I was about 14 and then going on my first diet (I weighed 62kg [about 135#] and was 5'6" tall - not fat but not rake thin). Wish I had someone say to me back then what our surgeon said to us when we first saw him - fierce dieting is a sure fire way of putting on weight in the longer term. It is a fact of life that some of us have a genetic propensity for storing calories as fat. We would have been the survivors in the stone age when sources of food were scarce (our fat stores would provide energy to go looking for food when food was in short supply while the skinny runts would all die as they would have no energy stores to rely on if they missed out on eating for too long etc) - its just too bad we live in a time of relative feast and not famine!! Maybe I would have felt a lot more comfortable with myself and would never have started the yo-yo dieting thing. Last night I was talking to one of the rake-thin women at poker. Lisa and I were discussing what to do for dinner. I explained to the woman that Lisa and I were dieting and both starving. She said she never feels really hungry and fills up as soon as she eats anything. I soooo hope the lap band is going to do this for us - help us not feel so hungry almost all the time. I hope it's the tool to help me avoid slipping back to bad habits. However, I know that weight is still only lost by exercising more and eating less (more calories out and less in). I'm prepared to do this - I just wanting eating less to be easier than it has been!

Yesterday, was the big day!!! I tried to update my blog last night, but hit the wrong key and deleted my update. But, I am happy to say everything went great yesterday. :cool: I love my surgeon's assistant, Melissa, who did my fill. She took her time and explained the whole fill process and all the questions they will ask me each time to determine if I should get a fill. She said after this first appointment, I can decide when I want to come in again (anywhere from 2 weeks to 8 weeks). She also explained how important it is to focus on reducing percentage of body fat... that over the course of time it takes to get to goal, she wants me to go from 51% body fat to 30% body fat. I'm all for it! And, she cleared me to return to Jazzercise (which I have been dying to do - walking is so boring to me). I'm just not supposed to do the stomach crunches they do at the end of class until 8 weeks. That's OK, I am usually so worn out by the time we get to the floor work that I just lay there anyway when everyone else does the crunches. OK, so on w/the fill. They have a big chair in every one of the exam rooms and I didn't know until this appointment that they electronically adjust all the way back so you are lying down when they put the needle in. So, I got to lying down, she cleaned the area, and told me to look away while she put the needle in. It was quick and no big deal. She gave me 2cc and then sat me back up to drink some water. The water went down fine, so she put in another cc (for a total of 3cc in a Lapband APS 10cc capacity). I drank some water again and it felt a little weird like it was not going through as fast and I felt some little bubbles, but it did not hurt. She stopped there. She told me after that she can give 2, 3, or 4 on the first visit, but most people get 3. So, I guess that makes me average. Now, the hard part... I am supposed to be on clear liquids for 72 hours (but no juice or sugar). I am trying, but I'm not sure if I'm gonna make it that long. I already cheated a little and put a little soy milk and agave nectar in my decaf tea. I am drinking clear protein shots I got from Costco (25 grams of protein in a 3 oz tube - tastes like unset jello - 100 calories). I drink my broth or tea as my 'meal' and then the protein shot like a 'dessert'. Yeah, right, not sure how long I can last like this! :thumbup: I'm also just curious to see if I can feel any difference when I eat from the 3cc. I might try a yogurt later today if I can't get my mind off of food after lunch. I did discover an AMAZING broth I just had for lunch. It is made by 'College Inn' and is called 'Culinary Broth' in 'Thai Coconut Curry' flavor... chicken broth infused w/a blend of coconut, curry, garlic, and coriander flavors. It has a lot of sodium, though, so I cut it half-and-half w/low sodium vegetable broth. It has great flavor, though... just the right amount of spice. OK, I am probably becomming delusional at this point from lack of calories if I am raving about a broth.

Yesterday, was the big day!!! I tried to update my blog last night, but hit the wrong key and deleted my update. But, I am happy to say everything went great yesterday. :thumbup: I love my surgeon's assistant, Melissa, who did my fill. She took her time and explained the whole fill process and all the questions they will ask me each time to determine if I should get a fill. She said after this first appointment, I can decide when I want to come in again (anywhere from 2 weeks to 8 weeks). She also explained how important it is to focus on reducing percentage of body fat... that over the course of time it takes to get to goal, she wants me to go from 51% body fat to 30% body fat. I'm all for it! And, she cleared me to return to Jazzercise (which I have been dying to do - walking is so boring to me). I'm just not supposed to do the stomach crunches they do at the end of class until 8 weeks. That's OK, I am usually so worn out by the time we get to the floor work that I just lay there anyway when everyone else does the crunches. OK, so on w/the fill. They have a big chair in every one of the exam rooms and I didn't know until this appointment that they electronically adjust all the way back so you are lying down when they put the needle in. So, I got to lying down, she cleaned the area, and told me to look away while she put the needle in. It was quick and no big deal. She gave me 2cc and then sat me back up to drink some water. The water went down fine, so she put in another cc (for a total of 3cc in a Lapband APS 10cc capacity). I drank some water again and it felt a little weird like it was not going through as fast and I felt some little bubbles, but it did not hurt. She stopped there. She told me after that she can give 2, 3, or 4 on the first visit, but most people get 3. So, I guess that makes me average. Now, the hard part... I am supposed to be on clear liquids for 72 hours (but no juice or sugar). I am trying, but I'm not sure if I'm gonna make it that long. I already cheated a little and put a little soy milk and agave nectar in my decaf tea. I am drinking clear protein shots I got from Costco (25 grams of protein in a 3 oz tube - tastes like unset jello - 100 calories). I drink my broth or tea as my 'meal' and then the protein shot like a 'dessert'. Yeah, right, not sure how long I can last like this! :thumbup: I'm also just curious to see if I can feel any difference when I eat from the 3cc. I might try a yogurt later today if I can't get my mind off of food after lunch. I did discover an AMAZING broth I just had for lunch. It is made by 'College Inn' and is called 'Culinary Broth' in 'Thai Coconut Curry' flavor... chicken broth infused w/a blend of coconut, curry, garlic, and coriander flavors. It has a lot of sodium, though, so I cut it half-and-half w/low sodium vegetable broth. It has great flavor, though... just the right amount of spice. OK, I am probably becomming delusional at this point from lack of calories if I am raving about a broth. :thumbup:

First, I want to stress that I truly wasn't compliment fishing yesterday. I was just so happy that I had seemed to get past a mental block of mine. But your comments just made me feel so good. Especially you, Janet! Your email made me decide to change my avatar, so I will be doing that soon! Thank you all, truly. Okay, onto the rest. I was sick yesterday. I'm afraid that until I get my tonsilectomy (29 more days) I will be constantly fighting this. But I went to the doctor and got some meds. About 2 hours after I took them, I started feeling better. I think it was the steroids. I feel SO MUCH better today. It is like I am a different person. But I was determined to get my fill yesterday. So I went and told the doctor that I wasn't as concerned with how much I was eating at once as I was that it didn't keep me full for very long. He took a look and gave me .25 cc's. The last few times I got fills, I only got .1 cc, so this is quite a bit more. I was a little nervous that it would be too much. I sipped my water just fine and I left. I had asked my PCP for liquid antibiotics, but it turned out that none of the pharmacies (including the compounding pharmacies) have them in stock. I would have had to wait until today (probably this evening) to start taking them. So I went with the horse pills. The steroids were small and caused me no issues. I crushed up the pill and put it in my frozen custard. It tasted disgusting, but went down just fine. I had a lot of gurgling through the evening, but I didn't have any reflux problems while I was sleeping. YAY! Today, I had my coffee and smoothie for breakfast. I took my steroids and even popped my full antibiotic without thinking about it and it went down just fine. I guess I'm not TOO FULL at all! :scared2: I'm eating some soup for lunch today and I will do that tonight too. Tomorrow I will start on some mushy soft stuff like mashed potatoes or something. I'm sitting out of Jazzercise tonight. It is hard for me to really get up the energy when I haven't eaten anything solid. BUT, my cousin is coming for a visit tomorrow and I am going to go home and organize at home. My housekeeper comes tomorrow and she will clean, but I need to sort out the clutter. That should burn a few calories for sure! Last night I got on my Wii Fit for the first time in MONTHS. I'm surprised my little Mii believed it was me. Anyway, I had lost 60 pounds since the previous time which was AWESOME to see!! But I had to laugh when the Wii still made sad noises and told me I was obese. Stupid Wii. BUT I was happy to see that the line didn't go off the charts anymore, it just hovered in the obese section. And finally, I get to today's clothing choice. My favorite part! The last time I had lost a lot of weight was 2005-2006. In 2006, my company took on a new partner company and my group tripled in size. I was in charge of the hiring and averaged 2 interviews a day. There would be some days I would have FIVE! I felt like an HR person...it was good experience though. Anyway, I had no time for myself and I put on about 50 pounds in 6 months. I hung there for about 3 years before I gained another 30 pounds and started this journey. Sooo...at the end of Winter 2006, before I had gained anything, my mom and I went shopping. I tried on a XL sweater dress that I never dreamed would fit me. Not only did it fit, but it looked spectacular! Unfortunately, since it was the end of the season, I couldn't wear it and I put it in the closet until the following Winter. Well, we all know what comes next. By that time, I was entirely to big to fit into the dress. BUT I kept it all this time and today, I took it out of the closet, took off the tags and wore it! Woo hoo! I wanted to take a pic for my mom, so I thought I would go ahead and include it. I'm 2 pounds away from the lowest I was at that time and only 8 pounds from the lowest I have ever been as an adult (1999). It is so close that I can taste it!

I have a couple of tasks at work that I am responsible for each week. Then there are a few each month and so on. Sometimes, like today, it comes time to do these tasks and I can't figure out where the time went. How could it possibly be time to do this when I feel like I just finished it? It's a never ending circle. Dieting is a task. Quite frankly, all my life, it was a task of low importance. At the beginning, I would plan my entire week of food, exercise, etc. It would go on like that for a few weeks, until I wouldn't have the time and then suddenly the diet is over. With the Band, I have found that I can break that cycle! Life is getting in the way of my tasks (exercise, calorie tracking, etc.), but the Band is still there for me. Right now, I'm in a great place! I still got myself to work out at lunch today, but I know that there will come a time when I won't. Something will get in the way. And it will be okay because I have my Band and it will keep me enough in check that I will be able to take a pause and get back to it without failing. That, my friends, is an amazing feeling! Side note: my mom has been diagnosed with glaucoma and is having a procedure today to help with it. So, I'm praying extra for her today. Also: thank you to you all out there for your posts. Each and every one of you are inspiring me to get where I want to be and I can't possibly thank you enough. You guys rock!

Y'all know how much I HATE to feel feel down. This week, I have not been losing and this morning on my official weigh in day, I was up .6. (At first I thought I was up a whole pound, so I'm not going to get too upset about just over a half!) Anyway, when I think back to why... Exercise: I exercised for a total of 3 hours last week. One hour of Jazzercise, 2 - 30 minute treadmill sessions (couch to 5k), & 60 minutes with my trainer. Not bad, but far from my best. Food: If I am honest with myself, I know that I did not make good food choices this week. I don't think it is about stress or comfort. I think that I'm hungry and I have no will power. The doctor had said that he thought I was close to my sweet spot and might not need another fill for a while, but I think that might not be the case. Typically, I'm not hungry in the mornings. I will usually drink a protein shake in the morning (around 9:30-10:00), not because I'm hungry, but to make sure I'm getting good protein. Today, my stomach was growling (with hunger) by 7:30 AM. I don't want to be so tight that I can't eat, but I do need to be tight enough to curb my hunger more. Punishment: because I have gained weight this week, my punishment is to log my caloric intake. I HATE DOING THIS! I know some people are completely focused on this and I know that it is probably extremely helpful. But I HATE IT. So, it is an effective punishment and motivator to not have to do it again. Interestingly, I seem to do better when I'm away from home. Pre-band, vacations were weight gain guarantees! However, now, it seems to have the opposite effect. I don't snack much and I find time to work out. So...I will track my calories Mon-Wed. If I'm on the right track by end of Wednesday, I won't track my vacation (Thurs-Tues). When I get back, I will have one week until my fill. Now that week includes my birthday...so wish me luck!! Ha! Random question: do you all update your avatar pictures? I know that picture is how people here know me, but it isn't me anymore. Do you all leave them or update them??

My doctor and nutritionist also recommend snacking. I have 3 meals and 3 Snacks a day. My "meals" are pretty lightweight -- usually between 150-200 calories and my snacks are smaller -- maybe 75-150 calories. I don't always get all the snacks in -- if lunch is a little late I might not have the afternoon one, for example. Even just a plum or a spoonful of Peanut Butter for me counts as a snack. I can't imagine going 5 hours without eating even though I don't feel hunger, I think it would make my energy bottom out too much.

You had major surgery and sleep is your bodies way of healing itself. Add to that the low calories and it will take weeks to feel really right again. I take 2 Vitamins and I take one at different times of the day. I'm going to move to Flintstone vitamins +Iron after I finish all my freebies. If that doesn't help then I'll adjust. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Try eating your bigger meal during the day, not at night. When you eat it during the day, your body has the rest of the day to try to use up some of those calories. When eaten at night, all it can do is digest while you sleep or otherwise take it easy.

I wouldnt get another fill. Ive been there. I thought the tighter I was the more weight I would lose and that just wasnt the case. I had to end up getting an un-fill. I found I wasnt able to get enough calories in to substain my workouts let alone lose fat. Its been 10 months for me and I just hit 45 lbs lost. For many of us it is a VERY slow process. If you are one of those people you must just learn to accept that. The band does about 15% of the work. 70% is your diet and te other 15% is your exercise. 5 bariatric surgeons told me this in a seminar I went to before surgery. I didnt believe them. I really thought I could work out hard and lose weight quicker. NOT true. I lose maybe half of a pound a week and I do all the right things.