LoseIt!

I too will be banded in January. Good luck to you! I'm sure everything will go smoothly.

I love that you wrote "You don't have to read this. Just some thoughts." at the beginning of your entry. That's what I think about every single one of my entries. Ha! The truth is though that everything you write down means something to you and I'm guessing will benefit someone out here. We are all out here for a reason. We are in this together! Good luck, chica!!

Thanks guys. **hugs**

I just read a whole bunch of posts from people who have had bad experiences with LB. There were studies sited and personal experiences shared. Sigh. Then there were people not being so nice to the posters. There are flat out denials, but then there is some compromise. Double sigh. I do understand that this is not magic. I understand that it will be up to me to make good food choices, to chew well, to exercise, and do all of the other things I need to do. I understand that I will need to listen to my body and trust my intincts. My biggest fear from what I was reading is that I will either feel no restriction or feel so restricted that I'm constantly throwing up. There were several people that had that experience and it scares me because the point of the LB is restriction, but too much is so unhealthy and counterproductive. My second biggest fear is that my stomach will erode around the band or that I will develop scar tissue on my liver and not realize it until a lot of damage has been done. I'm certainly not talking myself out of this, but it I can't say that it didn't dampen my spirits a bit this afternoon. I guess everyone faces the same thing. I am definitely not turned off by how much work it will be, but it is disheartening to think that I will do this, work hard and still could end up in a worse place. I prefer happy posts. :tongue2:

I just read a whole bunch of posts from people who have had bad experiences with LB. There were studies sited and personal experiences shared. Sigh. Then there were people not being so nice to the posters. There are flat out denials, but then there is some compromise. Double sigh. I do understand that this is not magic. I understand that it will be up to me to make good food choices, to chew well, to exercise, and do all of the other things I need to do. I understand that I will need to listen to my body and trust my intincts. My biggest fear from what I was reading is that I will either feel no restriction or feel so restricted that I'm constantly throwing up. There were several people that had that experience and it scares me because the point of the LB is restriction, but too much is so unhealthy and counterproductive. My second biggest fear is that my stomach will erode around the band or that I will develop scar tissue on my liver and not realize it until a lot of damage has been done. I'm certainly not talking myself out of this, but it I can't say that it didn't dampen my spirits a bit this afternoon. I guess everyone faces the same thing. I am definitely not turned off by how much work it will be, but it is disheartening to think that I will do this, work hard and still could end up in a worse place. I prefer happy posts.

Wow, dude, that's just not right! Hopefully the cold won't linger too long.

Congrats on feeling the change! That's great. Good luck on the novel. That's a big undertaking!

I just told my boss that I had to have a medical procedure done and will need to take some time to recover. Do you have a male boss? If you say that and look slightly uncomfortable, they often think it's "women problems" and don't ask anything more. Being out a week, I have to coordinate with a lot of folks at work. I've found that if I stay consistent and say I'm having a small surgical procedure, nothing to worry about...more preventive than anything, that seems to do the trick. Good luck!

Thank you for sharing that. I get banded on 1/27 and I like hearing real world experiences to help me prepare!

I LOVE Jazzercise! I haven't been able to do it lately because my feet hurt. One of my biggest reasons for doing this is so I can get back to Jazzercising with my friends! I don't get banded until Jan 27th. Best of luck to you next week!!

I can hear the pain in your post and my heart is breaking for you. I wish I could say something to you that would magically make it better, but that just isn't possible. We all understand the unhealthy relationship you have with food because we all have it, although it is a little different for everyone. I'm not banded yet, so I can't even offer you any advice. Be honest with your doctor though. That seems to be extremely important. Best of luck to you going forward. I know there is something inside you that you can bring out to help you do it!

I read this after I posted my blog today. Interestingly, mine was about all the health ailments I hope to eliminate or lessen. Go YOU!

Wow, good for you for facing it head on and getting back into it!

This might not be a very fun blog entry to read, but I felt it was one I needed to write so I could see it for myself. I keep saying that I want to be healthy, so what does that mean to me? Once I wrote it, I looked at it before I posted it. Wow. I need this surgery. I need help so I can get and stay healthy. Thank you all for existing so I have somewhere to do this. SLEEP. About 5 years ago, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea. Once I got used to my CPAP machine, I had the best nights of sleeping that I had in my life! Then I gained 40 lbs. It certainly didn't happen all at once, but it's like I noticed it all at once. I can feel that my machine is not effective any longer. I am exhausted all the time. I yawn constantly. I remember being like this before I got my machine. While I could go make appointments and get another sleep study and get it all changed (about 60-90 days), my hope is that in the next 3-4 months, I will lose the 25 or so lbs that will make the machine effective again. My ultimate goal would be to get off the machine altogether!! Acid Reflux. I take two Nexium a day. I have terrible reflux that my doctor has indicate would lessen considerably with weight loss. All the research I have seen indicates that people who suffer from acid reflux benefit greatly from the effects of the LB. I would love to be able to take only one a day with no flare ups. It would be super great if I didn't have to take it at all! Blood pressure & cholesterol. My blood pressure is mostly fine, but I had a period earlier this year when it was high. I took medication for one month and it seemed to lower and I was able to go off. My cholesterol is hovering near the elevated area. My goal is to NOT have to get on medication for these things! Skin. I've noticed that as the heavier I get the more issues I have with my skin. I know part of that is nutritional and that will help alone. Part of it is that I am less flexible and it is harder to clean and moisturize in every area. Gross and sad, but true. By being able to reach everything, and areas not being "lost" under flab rolls of skin, I think my overall skin will be much better! Feet. My feet hurt constantly. I honestly believe that I'm just trying to carry to much weight. I used to be able to exercise and then ice them, but I can't even do that anymore. I'm actually wearing flector patches during the day just so I can do normal walking. I should be at least able to do normal walking and low impact aerobics without ridiculous pain. I'm hoping for high impact aerobics, but I will settle for low if that is all I can get! Knees. In the last year, I noticed that as I exercised, my knees started to really hurt. No question in my mind that if I were carrying less weight, this would not be a problem at this point. Energy. I think this goes along with sleep, but since I'm not able to exercise, I just have no energy whatsoever. I'm sleeping 9-10 hours per night and it just doesn't feel like enough. I remember when I was exercising 7 hours per week. I was bouncing off the wall with energy! Anxiety. Yes, it would nice to be thin for looks. But mostly, I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. i didn't have any physical reactions to anxiety, but then I was like a volcano. I have it under control, but it would be nice to not have it at all. I feel that with weightloss, I will feel more comfortable and in control. With that, I feel that my anxiety will lessen. Comfort. Speaking of comfort, it would just be nice to be able to sit down in a chair and not be concerned if it is sturday enough. It would be nice to sit in a plane without being concerned that the person next to me is hating life because they are stuck next to a fat person. It would be nice for my nephews and neice to not innocently say things about how big/squishy/fat etc. their aunt is. I said to someone the other day, "The more you love yourself, the easier you are to love by those who love you." I believe that and I want to make it easier for my family and friends to love me. I want to LOVE myself. ALL of myself!! I am ready for my new life.

This might not be a very fun blog entry to read, but I felt it was one I needed to write so I could see it for myself. I keep saying that I want to be healthy, so what does that mean to me? Once I wrote it, I looked at it before I posted it. Wow. I need this surgery. I need help so I can get and stay healthy. Thank you all for existing so I have somewhere to do this. SLEEP. About 5 years ago, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea. Once I got used to my CPAP machine, I had the best nights of sleeping that I had in my life! Then I gained 40 lbs. It certainly didn't happen all at once, but it's like I noticed it all at once. I can feel that my machine is not effective any longer. I am exhausted all the time. I yawn constantly. I remember being like this before I got my machine. While I could go make appointments and get another sleep study and get it all changed (about 60-90 days), my hope is that in the next 3-4 months, I will lose the 25 or so lbs that will make the machine effective again. My ultimate goal would be to get off the machine altogether!! Acid Reflux. I take two Nexium a day. I have terrible reflux that my doctor has indicate would lessen considerably with weight loss. All the research I have seen indicates that people who suffer from acid reflux benefit greatly from the effects of the LB. I would love to be able to take only one a day with no flare ups. It would be super great if I didn't have to take it at all! Blood pressure & cholesterol. My blood pressure is mostly fine, but I had a period earlier this year when it was high. I took medication for one month and it seemed to lower and I was able to go off. My cholesterol is hovering near the elevated area. My goal is to NOT have to get on medication for these things! Skin. I've noticed that as the heavier I get the more issues I have with my skin. I know part of that is nutritional and that will help alone. Part of it is that I am less flexible and it is harder to clean and moisturize in every area. Gross and sad, but true. By being able to reach everything, and areas not being "lost" under flab rolls of skin, I think my overall skin will be much better! Feet. My feet hurt constantly. I honestly believe that I'm just trying to carry to much weight. I used to be able to exercise and then ice them, but I can't even do that anymore. I'm actually wearing flector patches during the day just so I can do normal walking. I should be at least able to do normal walking and low impact aerobics without ridiculous pain. I'm hoping for high impact aerobics, but I will settle for low if that is all I can get! Knees. In the last year, I noticed that as I exercised, my knees started to really hurt. No question in my mind that if I were carrying less weight, this would not be a problem at this point. Energy. I think this goes along with sleep, but since I'm not able to exercise, I just have no energy whatsoever. I'm sleeping 9-10 hours per night and it just doesn't feel like enough. I remember when I was exercising 7 hours per week. I was bouncing off the wall with energy! Anxiety. Yes, it would nice to be thin for looks. But mostly, I just want to be comfortable in my own skin. i didn't have any physical reactions to anxiety, but then I was like a volcano. I have it under control, but it would be nice to not have it at all. I feel that with weightloss, I will feel more comfortable and in control. With that, I feel that my anxiety will lessen. Comfort. Speaking of comfort, it would just be nice to be able to sit down in a chair and not be concerned if it is sturday enough. It would be nice to sit in a plane without being concerned that the person next to me is hating life because they are stuck next to a fat person. It would be nice for my nephews and neice to not innocently say things about how big/squishy/fat etc. their aunt is. I said to someone the other day, "The more you love yourself, the easier you are to love by those who love you." I believe that and I want to make it easier for my family and friends to love me. I want to LOVE myself. ALL of myself!! I am ready for my new life.

Thanks Ima! I think it is interesting that you feel this was easier than quitting smoking. I can feel your excitement and that gets me excited. Good luck to you too!!

Good luck!!

I think it is harder to make friends the older you get. Kudos to you for getting out there and bettering yourself. In my opinion, it's not about actually losing weight or getting the degree for other people. It's that the better you feel about yourself, the more lovable you become to those you love!

Wow, a marathon! Good luck! Congrats on the weght loss too. I would say that 60 lbs is pretty fanstastic for 4 months!!

I would love to run a 5k. That is so awesome! Congratulations on the time too! I'm hoping that losing weight will make my feet hurt less so I can do some things like this. Way to go and keep it up!!

When I visited my surgeon, he said that he felt that with hard work, I shoud get to around 145 lbs. I laughed out loud...with disbelief and delight. I currently weigh around 275 which is more than my dad. And my dad is a hefty dude! I gained quite a few pounds this year, about 15-20 from quitting smoking and 5-10 from being lazy. My "normal" weight is around 250. My lowest point which I hovered around for a few months two different times (once in 2000 and the other in 2006) was 200. I felt downright hot at those points! I was wearing clothes from "normal" stores. I really felt that I looked good, but I just couldn't stay there. In college, I was right around the 200 mark as well. In high school, I remember lying on my driver's license that I was 155, but I was really 165-170. By the time I graduated, I think I was around 180. I found some high school sennior pics the other night that I have posted to this entry. I remember thinking that I was SO fat, but at this age, I think I look great! If I were to get to 175 (100 lbs. lost) and maintain it for the rest of my life, I think I could be quite content. But before I make that goal, I'm going to make the goal of the doctor's goal of 145. Maybe with the right help, confidence and focused work, I can get to that weight and maintain it. I'm willing to keep my mind open and set small goals as I go. I don't want to frustrate myself or set too lofty goals, but I also don't want to close my mind to an amazing possibilities. Shortterm goals for now...but the mind stays firmly open!!

When I visited my surgeon, he said that he felt that with hard work, I shoud get to around 145 lbs. I laughed out loud...with disbelief and delight. I currently weigh around 275 which is more than my dad. And my dad is a hefty dude! I gained quite a few pounds this year, about 15-20 from quitting smoking and 5-10 from being lazy. My "normal" weight is around 250. My lowest point which I hovered around for a few months two different times (once in 2000 and the other in 2006) was 200. I felt downright hot at those points! I was wearing clothes from "normal" stores. I really felt that I looked good, but I just couldn't stay there. In college, I was right around the 200 mark as well. In high school, I remember lying on my driver's license that I was 155, but I was really 165-170. By the time I graduated, I think I was around 180. I found some high school sennior pics the other night that I have posted to this entry. I remember thinking that I was SO fat, but at this age, I think I look great! If I were to get to 175 (100 lbs. lost) and maintain it for the rest of my life, I think I could be quite content. But before I make that goal, I'm going to make the goal of the doctor's goal of 145. Maybe with the right help, confidence and focused work, I can get to that weight and maintain it. I'm willing to keep my mind open and set small goals as I go. I don't want to frustrate myself or set too lofty goals, but I also don't want to close my mind to an amazing possibilities. Shortterm goals for now...but the mind stays firmly open!!

I love your hair! Too cute!

I'm so impressed with you. My surgery is on 1/27 and my preop diet starts 1/13. I feel strongly that I will be able to do it when it comes time, but I'm having a horrible time being disciplined now. There is food out EVERYWHERE for the holidays. From here on in, I'm going to think WWLD...What would ldswims do? :sneaky:

Good luck! I'm sure that your doctor would not require anything he didn't feel you could accomplish. I hope all goes well!