Mountaingal

Yea, and ugh, this is why I am not sharing with my family (other than H and kids). Sometimes I wonder if their own regrets may be a factor. What would my 63 yo future self say to me if she had a time machine? I'm pretty sure she would kick my butt for staying obese and unable to live the life she/I deserves << maybe that is what my 75yo mom would think about my upcoming surgery, but about herself?

Thanks. Just seems like every time I talk to one of them they have something negative to say. I would say they're just concerned for me, but it doesn't feel that way! Lol

Everyone has issues like that.
People are always going to be unsupportive.
You need to do what is best for you.
It's not about losing some weight, it's about losing weight and keeping it off.
Anyone can lose some weight, but long term success is what matters.

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Congratulations on your choice Rainbow Warrior. Time to start telling people who want you rush you to the hospital over the holidays you have just started to make new and better choices for your health. Tell them long enough and they will believe you as you get healthier all the time. I told two of my children and my husband who were all great supporters. I left out remaining children and friends that would have not be positive influences on me. One of my children would have every sniffle and ache and pain directly caused by this choice for the rest of my life. Do what you need to for yourself. Good luck

It's a mental mechanism others develop to assume that all calorie controlled diets with exercise are easy and that I (and 95% of other grossly obese and morbidly obese people) are just not trying hard enough.
Over the las t 40+ years, I have watched some formerly very skinny and some average weight people become overweight then obese. I see their eyes when I say, "I know it's hard to diet for long periods of time, eh? ... harder than you used to think, eh?"
Some do begin to empathise ... but not all.
- - -
People who tell me my upcoming gastric sleeve op is cheating get both barrels from me.
I emphasise that I am spending megabuck$ to buy the advantage ... i.e. paying a direct price for all my failures at dieting because I want to "get in the game" and end the medications, the painful joints and the combined negatives of hal a lifetime of obesity.
Thanks for reading my 10c worth.

I just feel as though people believe this is a easy way out ; and emotionally it's far from easy and they don't understand unless they are going through it themselves so it brings me peace knowing I have others who are with me

Hear, hear to that.
There's a lot of judgemental nastiness out there.
As a BMI over 50 man, going to shops, cafes and public places has been an ordeal for many years. It's not the little innocent toddlers and pre-schoolers who say, "Mummy, why is that man so fat?"
It's the people, not just skinny ones either, who say things audibly (or before I'm out of earshot) who say the cruelest, nastiest, most vile things. Sadly, most of them also belittle Muslims, the handicapped, Pakistanis, people with physical deformities, etc.

Are you having a hiatal hernia repair too? I am and the recovery eating is the same as our food plan. So my thoughts are I will still be on puree at Thanksgiving (and smaller which can be explained by not being able to eat solids since my hernia surgery). Then come Christmas I can say that I am eating smaller portions because it still bothers me and I want to keep the weight that I loss off from the surgery. It is a shame I plotted it out this far....... I just don;t want to ruin Christmas!!! lol

I understand. So much negativity from random commentators that it's better to choose carefully who to tell. (I have replied to others here if you wish to read my 'fine print'.)

Yup! From my family only my mom and husband know. Dad, his family, stepmom and her family are too judgmental in life for me to care about their opinions to begin with so yeah, keeping it from them is the best choice in my life. Thankfully I have a handful of very supportive friends who back me up 100% as well, so family support is not really missed 🤣🤣

Me three! My mum and husband know that's it. And my mum knows because she's coming with me to be my nurse [emoji57]

I am not telling my family either. My wife knows but no one else. Really not in the mood for well-intentioned yet ill informed advice from the family. Even if the flip side is correct and they full support me 100%, I dont want it to be a constant topic of conversation. Other people thrive on support from family and friends and that was works for them. But for me, this forum and my wife is all the support I want.

Me and my daughter both ha gastric bypass we have no issues. But we the things we should do

Just another thought for you. I too did not want a large non reversible surgery. Rejected the idea of a lap band due to the things terms issues I read about. Having lost weight and regained before thought a balloon would not be a permanent "fix" for me so I investigated and then had a gastric plication. Surgery was two yrs ago and I have been very happy with the results. I had my surgery through Bariatric Pal and it cost me no more than a balloon procedure would in the US.

That's what I've been leaning towards. Just weird, when I started having problems with my band, I immediately wanted and was ready to have it removed and be revised to a different surgery. It took years for them to help me out and now I am super nervous about and scared to have revision surgery. I am not even interested in having the surgery, but I do realize I need it to help with weightloss. I can't do it on my own, especially with my metabolic and hormonal abnormaloties. I need to be brave. Every time I think about surgery, I get major anxiety. Been this way for about 7 or 8 years now. Hoping I get over the fear an axiety soon!

I was just there a week ago! Wonderful!

I saw a you tube of him doing the actual sleeve surgery and he seemed very thorough. I was actually scheduled at ALM-Mi Doctor and there was a death on 3/25. Scared the crap out of me and I canceled! I liked dr illan because of course the price is right and he only does 2-3 sleeves in one day as opposed to 7 or 8.

You are going to get a lot of responses for him. I went to him and my experience was awesome. He and the hospital staff were the best. The care was better than state side. I had no complications and I work with 3 other patients of his. All of us are very happy! Make sure to talk to the Coordinator, Bill.

How are you doing now Connie? I hope it is going well. I also got sharp stabbing pain when I drank for the first few months. Gradually got better and is now gone completely. I am 65 had surgery at 64. Wish I had done it sooner but husband and Dr were against it. Finally took control of my life and am glad I did.

I did not use Dr Illan as he was not on the scene when I had my surgery with Bariatric Pal Mexico. However I will say they take the best care of you possible. Far better than in the US. I am sure they have only chosen the best Dr and hospital to represent them. My husband was not keen on the idea either but now he says he should have encouraged me to do this years ago.

I think most US Drs aren't keen on us going elsewhere in the world for surgery. That said I believe I had far better care in Mexico than I would have in the US. If it is the only way you can get it done research your Dr well or put yourself in Bariatric Pal Mexico's hands. They will take good care of you.

You will get what you put into it, but that would be from any weight loss surgery. If you are thinking that WLS will be a solution to being overweight, you're going to be sadly disappointed. The weight will come off with any WLS, but there is only so much surgery alone can do for you. The honeymoon period after WLS is gone very quickly and you will be able to gain weight back if you are not making everlasting changes. My advice is to make big changes to your diet and lifestyle in conjunction with WLS to achieve the results you want. Being healthy is a way better goal than a number on the scale. Good luck to you.

I think most US Drs aren't keen on us going elsewhere in the world for surgery. That said I believe I had far better care in Mexico than I would have in the US. If it is the only way you can get it done research your Dr well or put yourself in Bariatric Pal Mexico's hands. They will take good care of you.

I was warned by a friend who went thru this surgery years ago to watch for your husband trying to sabotage your results. I was two weeks post op on V day. Still on liquids and my husband walked in with my absolute favorite chocolate covered strawberries. I got so upset with him. He say well " I know you can't eat these so I'll eat them" . He did that just to be mean and I'm not falling for that this time.! I lost 100lbs on my own years ago and he did everything he could till I felt bad about it and gained it back. Don't let anyone come between you and your success.

Heck, I even throw stuff in the trash and make sure it's mixed well with the garbage if I have to. [emoji23]